Co-housing approach

[pinkytoe]

Just today, walked through an inner city co-housing area nearby. It was lovely. The structures appear to be two-story Victorian style duplexes with skylights and lots of windows placed at various angles on a city block. There are many trees and plants affording privacy and winding paths throughout; a huge food garden in the central area and flower gardens everywhere. In the right unit, fantastic view of the mountains. They also have a large common house with massive fireplace with dining facilities, library, meeting rooms etc. All ages - children to elderly - were about. The units range from $250-350K so not affordable for many. Plus a monthly maintenance fee of $250. Sure beats the yucky senior living place MIL ended up at for $5000 a month.

[Teacher Terry]

Here seniors sometimes rent out 1 or 2 of their bedrooms.

[rosarugosa]

One concept that has not been mentioned is what I hope will happen in my life. I live in my own home and, if necessary, have a support person/couple live in part of the house.

I know there are vulnerabilities with this but these can be managed appropriately. If the cost of assisted living indicates that I will spend $$$$ money in a facility or in my own home making the decisions, I will stay in my own home. From reports that I read over the past few years, it is only the last year of life that basically independent individuals need extra personal care. My lawn and gardens are low maintenance and the snow removal is minor. I made all the decisions with this in mind when I purchased this home.

For me being forced to live in a single bedroom condo/apartment because I don't have a partner at present and being judged by society as wasteful in having a home of my own seems very, very wrong to me. It is ageist and patriarchal thinking that a solo loses the freedom of choice but couples have total freedom. RUBBISH!!!!!

I am certainly not suggesting that anyone be forced to do anything. It sounds like your house was carefully selected with thought given to aging in place, and it also sounds like you have the financial resources to make it work when/if your abilities diminish. I'm talking about people in old New England housing stock: 3 bedrooms, 2 floors, 1 bathroom, not ideal for aging in place, and perhaps without the resources for for hiring help when/if necessary. My mom wants to stay in her home of 56 years, and I will do what I can to make that possible for as long as possible. That means I get to kind of manage two houses, since neither of our houses is really set up well for co-housing. It just seems like there could be better options. For example, just tossing out a quick thought, if all houses were built with an "in-law apartment," it would provide a lot more living arrangement flexibility to accommodate different scenarios.