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Thread: Co-housing approach

  1. #11
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    I don’tWant to share a house with anyone I’m not married to, and I often have trouble sharing it with the person I am married to. I could live in a cell, in a prison cell or a nun’s cell, will have to be there but I want four walls that I can escape to without a human.


    On a related note garden club friends are gearing up to attend a symposium that is being held at a nunnery. If we want to stay there super cheap we can, but we have to share rooms. I told the group sorry no I’m not doing that. I don’t mind sharing a bathroom, I don’t mind living in a simple nun cell, but I’m not gonna share a room.
    After my recent three-week bus trip and being in my own room each night, I fully agree. I need my own space and will pay the premium to ensure that happens.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  2. #12
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    I'll join the Privacy Club. I went to a polymer conference once where we had to sleep in a bunkhouse (!). Not an experience I'd like to repeat. Nun's cell, not so bad.

    I'm with Razz in that I'm prepared to pay for the privilege and luxury of having my own digs. I'm endlessly thankful that my life arranged itself so that I could. I might have been able to live with a partner--probably not without a lot of wrangling--but God help me, not roommates. Shudder.

    ETA: I found myself guffawing this morning over a radio bit, and thought how often I laugh, all by myself. I had no idea you had to have other people present to activate your humor response.

  3. #13
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    I am wondering in the co-housing situation, is this just for when one is still independent and doesn't need any sort of care or major extra help? One woman in the original article is quoted as seeing this as an alternative to a retirement home or long-term care, but I doubt if "roommates" are going to be up for providing the type of care offered in assisted living or long-term care . . . .

  4. #14
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mamalatte View Post
    I am wondering in the co-housing situation, is this just for when one is still independent and doesn't need any sort of care or major extra help? One woman in the original article is quoted as seeing this as an alternative to a retirement home or long-term care, but I doubt if "roommates" are going to be up for providing the type of care offered in assisted living or long-term care . . . .
    Reading between the lines, the situation described above is NOT about anyone needing assistance in daily living. It seems to be purely about finances.

    I would like more detail.

    I keep thinking of our friend’s father who lived ina senior community, a place that provided meals, for around $35,000. That was q few years ago so likely it is quite a. It more, ut
    I hought that was a good deal: two rooms of hisown, all meals, basic laundry service.

    For additional money he could have medications administered, help dressing and cleaning his apartment, etc.

  5. #15
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    It is all about the borders you put around the situation. Independent living is just that. Maybe the building has a few items like inside community rooms, coffee area, inside mail, etc. Hey, that sounds like senior independent apartments are pretty much just like others with an age restriction.

    Then there are the vast assisted living places where residents usually need assistance with things like cooking, maybe dressing, housecleaning, etc. Additional services as needed might be administering medication, assistance with bathing and eating, etc.

    Once the threshold is passed and actual hands on medical care is needed, the level of skilled care, the person may be moved to a different part of the assisted living area or another facility. Same with memory care. If the person exceeds the level of care for a dementia patient that the assisted living facility can provide, they will need to be moved to a segment or another facility that specialize in memory care.

    This whole thing is a continuum. In the Golden Girls, they were all independent and fully capable of living their own lives. It would be wise when entering such an arrangement later in life that discussion are held and contracts made for what happens if advanced care is needed. Cohousing groups have often had these discussions when they found that someone living in their midst needed much more care than they could or would provide. Taking a meal for a sick friend is much different from feeding someone who cannot feed themselves 3X a day.

    (Mom was asked one time to ensure that a friend took her medication. We had to nix that idea as it exposed her to too much emotional involvement if something should go wrong or if her friend would deteriorate. If you cannot take your own medication, you need a relative or paid assistant to do this.)

  6. #16
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    Co-housing is definitely not for me. I agree with IL.

  7. #17
    Simpleton Alan's Avatar
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    The only co-housing I've ever experienced looked like this.

    "Things should be made as simple as possible, but not one bit simpler." ~ Albert Einstein

  8. #18
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan View Post
    The only co-housing I've ever experienced looked like this.

    looks like a gaol setting but I am assuming a military barracks or scout camp OR ?
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  9. #19
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    Or maybe a modern revival of the Brother House of the Mystic Order of the Solitary <wink>.

  10. #20
    Simpleton Alan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by razz View Post
    looks like a gaol setting but I am assuming a military barracks or scout camp OR ?
    Military barracks, although that's a stock photo just for reference. The ones I knew first hand were mostly wooden frame buildings without such modern conveniences as Emergency Lighting on the walls and Exit Signs, and the beds were always covered with olive drab wool blankets.
    "Things should be made as simple as possible, but not one bit simpler." ~ Albert Einstein

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