I wouldn't mind living in a low-key intentional community, wherein you had a loose support system and generally looked out for each other, without having to be knee-deep in other people all the time.
There's an organization called Villages that seems to serve a similar purpose. https://villagesnw.org/
"Do you think you should have pushed more because you said no to yourself? Or is it because you said no to others expectations."
Probably because, left to my own devices, I would be perpetually sitting in a corner with a book. I seem to have been gifted with no other ambitions to speak of. Which may or may not be a blessing.
Forums only know what you type. If you have really close friends they know you intimately. Forums are fun but not a replacement.
It doesn’t matter really what we choose to do with our lives - as long as we have autonomy to choose and we’re not hurting other people.
I despise social expectations.
yea really, and a lot of things are "all other things held constant" assumptions anyway, social life sure that's great, but we may be too overwhelmed with other crises to focus on that anyway (I am lately, all I really want sometimes is a quiet hobby. Keep in mind I spend time with my boyfriend and probably keep the place somewhat cleaner because of that too - I'm not a hoarder, but can be messy).It doesn’t matter really what we choose to do with our lives - as long as we have autonomy to choose and we’re not hurting other people.
I despise social expectations.
Trees don't grow on money
Jane, the village concept is interesting. There is a place in upstate New York (Ithaca?) where you can buy a house or condo so it’s slightly different. I had a party for 13 people yesterday and today I am exhausted. I feel my age today.
Chicken Lady, as I read it you are wondering if you should try to be more social? Because somebody that wrote a book/paper/article implied you were not sodcial enough? I am an intentional un-social person, having worked 25 yrs plus working with the public. (It also made me a bit of a cynic.) It doesn't mean I don't help someone that needs it, I just won't hang around with them afterward, LOL. Seems you are worrying about someone else's lable they put on you. Don't fret about it, ain't nobody in the whole world 100% "normal" and if they say they are, they are lying. God bless those who step outside the shackles that society puts on folks with their labels. Those who dare to be different often become great. Don't sweat the small stuff.
Interesting.... I know when my friend was coming in every day to let my dogs out while I was at work, I kept my house cleaner, because I didn’t want her to have to come into a mess, and “because I’m going out to the driveway anyway, might as well take the garbage and recycling to the cans”
... and, because, like Bae, left to my own devices very long, I have stuff for many projects in process all over the place... I know that’s not the same as hoarding per se, but many people looking at it wouldn’t see the difference.
CL, have you ever read “Refuse to Choose” by Barbara Sher? I am often reminded of her books when you write.
Mschrisgo2, I have not. It looks like it might be related to the renaissance mind concept.
Kappydell, yes, I am wondering if I should make an effort to be more social because somebody wrote a book/paper/article - on how being more social appears to lead to changes I am trying to make. Not because I am concerned about the evaluation of my social level in and of itself.
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