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Thread: Menopause - a time of power

  1. #1
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Menopause - a time of power

    I read Apple News and love the diversity of sources that are included. When a female in my 50's with minor impact from menopause symptoms, I felt that I could do anything that I chose to do. In my 70's, I still don't accept all the limitations that society has imposed on older women.

    This article https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine...opause/596662/ explores very well all the influences that menopause has had in a woman's life socially, financially, politically and sees life as I do, full of possibility and adventure and hope.

    Yes, I am aware that menopause can be truly awful for some women and I do empathize but can we, please, please, please, avoid discussing menopausal symptoms and comparisons and focus on the power of the menopause for the human race as this article is suggesting.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  2. #2
    Senior Member rosarugosa's Avatar
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    That was an interesting article, Razz. As someone who decided at a very young age that motherhood was not for me, I did not have the same feeling about moving from a fertility stage of life to another stage.

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    Senior Member herbgeek's Avatar
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    Me too Rosa. Since I didn't want children, no longer being able to have them was a relief and a blessing. Menopause was a non event for this reason, although the marker of "aging" is still there.

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    My hot flashes started in perimenopause, over a decade before menopause, so The Change was liberating, with no worse physical symptoms and the elimination of cramps and mess. I was looking forward to it for years, but everyone's experience is different. On 90 Day Fiance I see post-menopausal American women involved with younger foreign men who expect them to have biological children. One is trying to convince her daughter to be a surrogate mother and another is thinking of test tube technology. I am happy to be in the US where women can be valued regardless of their fertility.

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    I have children. Once I was comfortable with the idea that I was not going to have any more, I would have been perfectly delighted to reach the end of my fertility. I have been looking forward to menopause for over a decade. I reached the post child(and no grandchildren) phase while still fertile. The two are not linked for me.

    I have always been comfortable with my age as a number - perhaps because I was a withdrawn, out of shape teenager and 40 y.o. Me could have outperformed 16 y.o. Me at pretty much anything. 50 y.o. Me is a bit annoyed by the wear on the equipment though.

    i was also raised around strong older women who did not make a big deal of menopause (apparently my mother in law was practically dying ��) and simply said things like “i’m done with all that.” In the same tone they would have used for washing diapers or teaching a child to drink out of a cup. - another messy annoying chore out of the way....

  6. #6
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    To me, this stage of life, after raising 4 children, represents freedom. I was just talking about this to my DIL, who is in the throes of raising young children. I told her about the day my DH was traveling and a friend of mine told me to get a babysitter, and we would go to the movies. I hadn't been to the movies in about 6 years because of my family responsibilities, and I balked at paying a babysitter just to see a movie. She talked me into it, and I'll never forget the experience. It was just a movie, but it could have been a day at the most expensive spa in the world. I'll never forget how I felt in the dark, with the popcorn and soda, watching Running On Empty. (Kind of an ironic movie title to be honest, now that I think about it--I had been running on empty--doing, doing, doing for everyone). During those two hours in that movie theatre, I felt carefree, calm, and ALONE.

    As the kids gained their independence, I found mine as well. The actual physical stuff related to moving out of the childbearing phase was very minimal for me.

    In 2012, I turned 60, and that was the year I got my permaculture design certificate. My general attitude about this stage of life is personal expansion. I've gotten Master Gardener credentials in two states, I volunteer on causes that I believe in, and, now without a dog, I'm pretty free to do whatever floats my boat, and I LOVE it. And my clients still value my work. At 67, I've booked more projects this year than I ever have.

    Of course, I loved my childbearing years, and my children continue to be a source of great joy. But, as the song goes in Spamalot, I may be "elderly" according to doctors, but I'm not dead yet. Far from it. I'm alive, I'm living and I'm loving it. I loved the article, razz. Thanks for posting.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
    www.silententry.wordpress.com

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    My career is taking off since my mid-40s. Im in my prime, career wise. Having a great time. Age 57.

    I have two distinct phases to my adult life. 20s and 30s were raising kids. Which was also wonderful - I loved it.

    Being older at work is great for me. People generally respect my years of experience.

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    I can wear white pants if I want to, I don't want to but I was always in awe of women wearing white pants when I knew they had periods

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    Once I had 3 kids we knew we were done so my husband had a vasectomy. I was glad not to worry about it. Menopause lasted 10 years and I had horrible hot flashes and lots of bleeding, etc. I spent a ton of time at the doctors. I was so glad when it was over. Once my kids grew up I loved my freedom and could focus on my career and friends. I also got dogs for the first time. A whole new life.

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