Most people have always known if they don’t want kids. Did you feel the same? Sometimes people that don’t want kids have trouble finding a suitable partner.
I always thought I'd have a bunch of kids like Mom did. When he said that, I decided I really loved and wanted him so career it was for me. I never looked back to analyze or evaluate. By the time I was 1 year in, I knew it was right. I loved my career and knew I couldn't be the fulltime Mom that mine was-which would have made me crazy. The only angst I had, was all the people telling me I needed to have kids. "You have to do it, you don't know what you're missing". "Do it. He won't leave you". We were married 28y the last time I was asked when we were having kids........
We're 58, married 39y. Nothing is missing from our life.
I am 65 years old and I did not have an experience of everyone telling me I had to have children. I think there might of been an inquiry or two especially on DH’s side because my own side of the family knew my position pretty early on. But a general inquiry for talking about having kids doesn’t make it pressure. It makes a conversation.
Thanks for sharing G. My sister is 73 and knew when young she didn’t want kids and probably didn’t want to get married. By her 30’s she quit dating. People said many cruel things and made untrue assumptions. She was beautiful so it certainly wasn’t from a lack of willing potential partners. I am glad things are changing in this regard.
People should keep their mouths shut because what if the couple is struggling with infertility.
Right?
Met a Mormon 1st day of Family Nursing Class. "Do you have kids?" No. "I'm sorry". We don't want kids. "Well, then you are NOT a family".
Became quite an argument in class. To say I was pissed is putting it mildy. We're a family if we can't have kids but not if we choose? WTF.
G, that’s terrible! It’s amazing that you got married so young and still happy. That’s a real accomplishment. Being with the right person makes all the difference in life. Now that we are getting older I do think about how different my life would be if my husband died before me. I have lots of friends and kids but much of my life revolves around all the things we do together. We travel perfectly together and even with good friends being great travel buddies doesn’t always happen. The last 2 years my husband has went to visit his son for 2 weeks each which I am glad he did but it really hit home when he has done this.
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