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Thread: A silly chuckle to enjoy

  1. #1
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    A silly chuckle to enjoy

    DD1 sent me this sometime after we had a discussion about protecting passwords, identity theft, etc.

    "Don't be worried about your TV and smartphone spying on you. Your vacuum has been gathering dirt on you for years".
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  2. #2
    Senior Member KayLR's Avatar
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    My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already!

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    LOL. Cute.
    To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." Mahatma Gandhi

    Be nice whenever possible. It's always possible. - Dalai Lama

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    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Very clever and witty daughter!
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
    www.silententry.wordpress.com

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    Senior Member CathyA's Avatar
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  6. #6
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    This may have been around before but it is still a silly chuckle. Don't think that the ages as stated reflect today's reality of those in their 80's acting and looking like those in their 60's. A friend is alertly driving herself daily at age 99.

    THE MANY ROADS OF LIFE AND A FEW WORDS OF WISDOM

    GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

    1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats..
    2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
    3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always Catch the second person.
    4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
    5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food..
    6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair..
    7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
    8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
    9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
    10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.


    GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

    1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jello to a tree.
    2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
    3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
    4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
    5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
    6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.


    GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

    1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

    2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
    3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
    4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
    5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
    6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
    7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

    THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

    1) You believe in Santa Claus.
    2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
    3) You are Santa Claus.
    4) You look like Santa Claus.


    SUCCESS:

    At age 4 success is . . . . Not piddling in your pants.
    At age 12 success is . . . Having friends.
    At age 17 success is . . Having a driver's license.
    At age 35 success is . . . . Having money.
    At age 50 success is . . . Having money.
    At age 70 success is . .. . Having a driver’s license.
    At age 75 success is . ... . Having friends.
    At age 80 success is . . .. Not piddling in your pants.

  7. #7
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Hope this works as an example of serious social distancing.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/ET57L0hXQAMx7GU.jpg:large
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

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    After checking out his room at the Redneck Motel the guest calls the front desk and says, "I've got a leak in the sink." The clerk says, "Well go right ahead."

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    Senior Member SteveinMN's Avatar
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    "In some ways, the quarantine suited him. He loved silence and he was great at avoiding people. Plus, folks were stockpiling cash and goods, and they were totally unimaginative about where they kept it all. But now everyone was always home. It was a weird time to be a cat burglar." -- Micro Flash Fiction on Twitter
    Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. - Booker T. Washington

  10. #10
    Senior Member Tradd's Avatar
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    Steve, that is FUNNY!

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