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Thread: A silly chuckle to enjoy

  1. #11
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    All Brilliant!


    Since God is watching us,
    We may as well be amusing.

  2. #12
    Senior Member SteveinMN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tradd View Post
    Steve, that is FUNNY!
    Thanks. Micro Flash Fiction (@MicroFlashFic) is a great account to follow on Twitter. Very efficient writing and a dry sense of humor/foreboding in many of the posts. Worth following even if you have no interest in the rest of the morass that is Twitter.
    Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. - Booker T. Washington

  3. #13
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.

    * I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.

    * I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

    * Still haven't decided where to go for Easter ----- The Living Room or The Bedroom

    * PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

    * Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

    * I don't think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we'd go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone

    * This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog..... we laughed a lot.

    * So, after this quarantine.....will the producers of My 600 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?

    * Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.

    * My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.

    * Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

    * I'm so excited --- it's time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

    * I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyardah. I'm getting tired of Los Livingroom.

    * Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

    * Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said "I hope I don't have the same teacher next year".... I'm offended.

    * Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  4. #14
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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  5. #15
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    Razz, I am not turning into a better cook)

  6. #16
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Hi Guys,
    Just be careful because people are going crazy from being in lockdown.
    Actually I have been talking about this with the toaster and the microwave while drinking coffee and all of us agree that things are getting bad. I didn’t mention anything to the washing machine as she puts a different spin on everything. Certainly not to the fridge as he is being very cold and distant.
    Eventually the iron calmed me down as she said that everything will be fine, no situation is too pressing.
    The hoover was very unsympathetic… telling me to just suck it up but the fan was more optimistic and hoped that it would soon blow over!
    The toilet looked a bit flushed when I asked its opinion and didn’t say anything but the door told me to get a grip. The front door said I was unhinged so the curtains told me to…. yes, you guessed it…. pull myself together.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  7. #17
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    Razz, these are all great - LOL. Thanks.
    To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." Mahatma Gandhi

    Be nice whenever possible. It's always possible. - Dalai Lama

  8. #18
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    These are great!! I read them out loud to my husband and we both laughed!!!! It's good to laugh. Thank you!

  9. #19
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Some more taken from images forwarded to me. I don't know how to add images that don't turn to code when I paste.

    * if they shut schools for too long, mothers are going to find a solution for the virus before the scientists.
    * isolate, practice social distancing, clean yourself, - omg, I have become a housecat.
    * for the first time in history, we can save the human race by laying in front of the TV and doing nothing. Let's not screw this up!
    * after 6 days without sports, we are watching the birds fight over worms. Blue Jays 3, Cardinals 2.
    * gas is finally affordable and we can't go anywhere.
    Gandhi: Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony .

  10. #20
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    New York Times article by Virginia Heffernan, When Assistance Dealing With Addiction Must Go Online contained this observation, from an AA meeting participant: "Alcoholics fear two things: Change. And the way things are right now."
    Yes, and "The trick is accepting both."

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