I've been meaning to write this for about the past week and this kind of goes hand-in-hand with Chicken Lady's post about being held accountable for what I eat, but I am finding that co-habitating with my boyfriend is causing both of our weights to creep upward. I have gained about 12 lbs since I moved to New Mexico back in 2016 and there are so many reasons why, but knowing all that doesn't make it any easier to do something about it. Almost five years post-Wholefoods job I realize my weight loss during then was very place specific, meaning I was running around ALL THE TIME at that job and it kept me fit. I also had no social life and rarely drank alcohol. I was really strict and anal about everything in my life - money-sleep-free time; I exerted so much control over everything I did and as a result I saved lots of money, was quite svelte and was building my jewelry business. All of that positioned me for moving forward in my goals for my life.
Fast Forward 4.5 years: I really do have the life I want, I am social when I want to be (but it all revolves around booze), have been in a relationship for three years, have a job much more suited to me (but is VERY sedentary) and now I am heavier than I have been in a long time. At least I am tall and hide it pretty well, but I don't like the fact that most of my old clothes don't fit and I hate wearing jeans now. So MANY factors go into this: losing my daughter the exact year I went through menopause, and having such a variety of health issues last year serve to make me feel like I have aged tremendously in the last 18 months. So many things on my body hurt - my lower back, my wrists, my neck - you name it, it will probably be hurting on any given day.
But back to the title of this piece: my boyfriend has to commute an hour each way and he really enjoys a good dinner when he gets home. He is a meat-n-potatoes kind of guy, and also a Type I Diabetic. We take turns with the cooking. On my days I usually cook a home made meal but he likes and needs to have a carb, a protein, and some fat in order to keep his blood sugar levels on target. He also has a terrible sweet tooth, which is not good for a diabetic. All fall we got into this habit of having a little ice cream while we watch Netflix. Ping, there's a few pounds on me right there...plus having a beer or two a couple of times a week. But on his day to cook, he procures dinner from the deli or the frozen food section at the grocery store on the way home; I can't expect him to actually "cook" something homemade after his commute. I rarely watch my portions either; I'll be doing something while he "makes" dinner on his day and when I go to sit down my plate is piled almost as much as he piles onto his. There are so many things I could be doing to get out of this overeating rut that I haven't been doing, but I am starting to now, at least. I don't think being too skinny looks very good on older women; I just want to lose 8-10 lbs; between 160 and 164 is where I would prefer to be.
So here is my start:
1. I joined the community center gym in Santa Fe but can only go once or twice a week, as it is a 30 mile drive. I go on my days off when I go to town to do errands. This schedule will be disrupted as I am on jury duty for the next two months.
2. I am cooking at least two vegetarian meals on my days to cook.
3. I need to measure out my own portions (and put on a smaller plate like I used to) instaed of letting him serve me.
4. We are not buying ice cream anymore, but K. keeps buying Pepperidge Farm cookies for Netflix time. I keep it at two cookies per evening.
5. I'm trying not to drink beer but once or twice a week at the most
6. I am doing more stuff around the house and yard (weather permitting).
7. I keep less food at the gallery (where I used to live) so I am not eating indiscriminately through out the day. I usually bring a specific lunch and snack and try really hard not to go up to the general store and buy a snack because I am bored.
8. As the days get longer and the desert dries out, we plan to do a lot more walking and also there is a TON of yard work and landscaping to do (as long as my hands hold out...they really get quite sore and I can't do the stuff I used to be able to at the intensity I am used to).
9. I need acceptance that my body really is changing and that is pretty normal for a woman my age. I actually look voluptuous, not fat really, just a lot curvier than I ever used to be. I was pretty skinny as a stick as a child and teenager . Now a lot of my weight gain is in the belly and chest area so I need to go buy some new bras. I do dress well to enhance my figure and have no desire to squeeze myself into too small clothes. I love leggings and stretchy skirts right now!
How do you manage living with someone when there are two different styles of eating going on? I am much better about what I eat when I am on my own!