Geila, we are with you. Also, it is equally important to talk about the what ifs when you are younger. I have told my husband that I am not going to ever be the personal hands on caretaker for his parents. I will watch over his mom, take her places, ensure she is warm, comfortable, and fed. I am not a nurse and did not want anyone to "expect" those services from me. He clearly understands. My parents are deceased and lived on the other side of the country from me. Thankfully, they were able to take care of themselves.
Sounds cold but it is setting my own boundaries and making sure they are understood.