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Thread: Being Mortal

  1. #1
    Geila
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    Being Mortal

    Has anyone read Being Mortal: Illness, Medicine, and What Matters in the End
    by Atul Gawande? https://www.amazon.com/Being-Mortal-...e%2C222&sr=1-2

    I got it by accident in my latest library batch. I thought it was Being Moral and assumed it was a philosophical book. Also got A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic - which made it clear that I am not meant to be a stoic! Plus Educated and Hillbilly Elegy. A good batch of books.

    But this book, Being Mortal, is blowing me away.

  2. #2
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    Being Mortal is one of those books that has stuck with me. I have always thought that the practice of medicine today interferes more than it helps especially as we age.

  3. #3
    Geila
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    It really makes you think about what kind of life you want to live. The idea of living until your body literally decays and you slowly waste away is scary to me. I really appreciate how honest he is about doctors' limitations and their human failings in addressing many issues with their patients. It puts things in a new light for me. I appreciate knowing what it's like from their perspective. I'm now at the chapter for nursing homes and it is horrible.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    I don’t intend to go to a nursing home and don’t intend to pursue unrealistic treatments to stay alive a little longer.

  5. #5
    Geila
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    The book has made me realize what a slippery slope the treatments are. How quickly it snowballs and people don't know when to stop. I'm also learning a lot about hospice.

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    Thanks for the update. Sounds like a good book to read!

  7. #7
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    The book was interesting and informative.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Simplemind's Avatar
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    I don't intend to go into a nursing home either but life has shown me that intentions are great but the reality of the situation may play out much differently. My mom never went but thankfully she predeceased dad. We tried to keep dad at home for a long as possible but with dementia it was a losing battle. Thankfully each of both places we had him as he progressed were ones that I would have been happy to be in myself were I in the same circumstances. I have had many conversations with my son and I don't want him to feel he has to care for me at home. On the other hand, he also worked for a mortuary company for a bit and went to many nursing homes after a patient had passed. He had horrific tales about some. He would never let me be in any of those. He also worked for MedCure, a body donation company. He came away with many thoughts on that as well. I was recently surprised to find he is very much against physical assisted suicide, which I am all for and hope I don't ever need to look into.

  9. #9
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    When my mother-in-law died on the last day of vacation in VT because the doctor suggested that we consider the physical and emotional toll surgery would have on her, we went with his advice and she died. I have often wondered what would have happened if it had been a week later when we would have been back from vacation, in NJ, and might have taken her to RWDNJ--a big academic teaching hospital. Another doctor would probably have pushed for surgery. She may or may not have recovered from it.

    I still feel guilty sometimes for not going to "extraordinary lengths" to keep her on this earth, but OTOH, I know qualitatively from my observations and conversations with her, that she was ready to die. She was 85.

    I am starting to learn, at 68, about loss... and how inevitable it is. It's an education in acceptance.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
    www.silententry.wordpress.com

  10. #10
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    MIL just turned 86 and is in assisted living and basically in prison due to Covid. We are going to drive two days to see her as we are finally allowed to visit for 30 minutes through a window. I have a sense that she would like to see family members one last time before she lets go. We marvel at her staying power...her mind is sharp but her physical state is horrible. What is the point???

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