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Thread: Opposing viewpoints

  1. #1
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    Opposing viewpoints

    I read about a FB group (Wives of the deplorables) started by some women who are grappling with the opposing views of their Trump supporting partners. I am now dealing with something similar as DH seems to be moving towards the dark side. I noticed it after the lockdowns and him spending much more time on the internet. As an example, he has convinced himself that the virus is man-made and that the tests are manipulated to show positives. He gets upset when I try to explain to him that we can all find "evidence" to support whatever we decide to believe. Mostly I say I don't know what the heck is going on out there with all of this but I don't think it's all some great conspiracy. I am concerned at this point about his mental health (and mine too) if I have to listen to his rants anymore. For now, we just stay in our separate spaces most of the day. Is there anyone else dealing with this?

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    I work with a bunch of Trump fans who are convinced of voter fraud and that the Georgia recount is the start of things turning around so he can stay in power. It doesn't bother me because I know it's not true. I am similarly not bothered by people who hold religious beliefs I find fanciful.

    Some people you can't explain things to because they are not receptive and you have to try to find common ground on other topics.

    If he starts on a rant can you go on a walk or something?

  3. #3
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    I am glad that my Trump voting spouse takes the
    virus seriously. He is free to think whatever he wants to think as long as he doesn’t endanger me or others.

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    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    Fortunately my husband didn’t support Trump this time and he takes the virus seriously. I would agree not to discuss it but that won’t help with the virus denial.

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    Senior Member jp1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    I work with a bunch of Trump fans who are convinced of voter fraud and that the Georgia recount is the start of things turning around so he can stay in power.
    I guess these coworkers aren't very good at math? At this point Georgia doesn't matter. Or for that matter Pennsylvania. Arizona and Nevada were all that Biden needed to overthrow the fat corrupt a-hole.

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    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Even my Trump-loving husband is talking to him through the TV saying, "Just give it up, man! You lost!"

    It feels like the air is out of Trump's balloon. He's AWOL on the job. His colleagues in the White House are fading away. The dragon has turned into a little salamander. I can't imagine the emotional pain he's going through, having to call himself a loser.

    As for the virus, DH has always been very fearful of COVID. He's said "I know I can die of a lot of things [referring to all his bad habits], but I don't want to die from this!" We have told my DS-the one who practically lives here--that following his trip to Nashville he MUST quarantine for 2 weeks before we see him. And that directive is coming from DH.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Catherine, I’m glad your husband is taking the virus seriously because it probably would knock him on his ass.

    I do have to ask, what happened to the BIL? Where Did BIL land? If you tell me then I’ll give you an update on DH’s family farm situation. They were in court last month. It’s not pretty.

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    Junior Member ewomack's Avatar
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    As much as some people would like to deny it, which might serve as a coping mechanism of some sort, the virus is real, awful and one of the nastiest things that the current generations have had to deal with. Sadly, denial and defiance just make things worse, as biology doesn't listen to politically motivated gripes. But many people remain susceptible to "hearing what they want to hear," so any prominent figure proclaiming that it's not real or a fraud will inevitably attract some followers. People are often their own worst enemies, especially when they can't accept that reality isn't always what they want it to be.

    The original post sounds like an incredibly difficult situation. The current political landscape offers very little room for compromise or mutual understanding, so dealing with it in a relationship sounds pretty horrible. I hope that something works out. My wife and I agree politically so we don't have this issue, but I can't imagine what I would do if it sprouted up suddenly.

  9. #9
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ewomack View Post
    As much as some people would like to deny it, which might serve as a coping mechanism of some sort, the virus is real, awful and one of the nastiest things that the current generations have had to deal with. Sadly, denial and defiance just make things worse, as biology doesn't listen to politically motivated gripes. But many people remain susceptible to "hearing what they want to hear," so any prominent figure proclaiming that it's not real or a fraud will inevitably attract some followers. People are often their own worst enemies, especially when they can't accept that reality isn't always what they want it to be.

    The original post sounds like an incredibly difficult situation. The current political landscape offers very little room for compromise or mutual understanding, so dealing with it in a relationship sounds pretty horrible. I hope that something works out. My wife and I agree politically so we don't have this issue, but I can't imagine what I would do if it sprouted up suddenly.
    well this is a perfect topic where, when I think about who to vilify for their thoughts ��, I divide points of view into those that are reasonable and those that are crank. There are points of view that are reasonable that are not mine. Yes! In my world that is possible, a reasonable opinion that I don’t share.

    So for example, I think a reasonable point of view is grave concern about what lockdowns are doing to our society in areas of education, healthcare, employment, economy, and mental health. Expressing that view as a dominant concern seems reasonable to me.

    On the flipside, expressing grave concern about the virus completely as a health issue is reasonable to me too. Because it *IS*a health issue.

    These are fringe opinions:

    *China purposely spread this into the world,

    *The virus will disappear when Biden is elected/ media conspiracy to get Biden elected

    *Government of any size controlling our behavior in any way for the health of the populace is wrong

    I don’t know anyone who espouses the crank opinions as their sole opinion they are 100% invested in. I doubt that any of you do either. I think in the world of discussion, the “other side quote is demonized by oversimplifying their point of view.

    i’d also like to add that regardless of what someone thinks about the virus, one can still live with a partner who treats his own health casually. It’s entirely possible because I’ve heard about it that when a partner goes out and about in normal business even though he knows it’s a serious health problem.

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    I honestly think it is too much time spent on the internet and the fact that DH has always been easily persuaded on many topics. He doesn't like Trump but like so many angry white males feels like his world has been turned upside down I guess. Even though I'd like to plead my case, I am learning to just leave the room and say "you're probably right" to avoid conflict on the topic of politics. But it makes me so sad to know he feels that way.

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