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  1. #51
    Senior Member Yppej's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by razz View Post
    OK!!!! I protest this gloom and doom. We can do something about it, each and everyone of us instead of crying; go for a walk greeting your neighbours or find someone to greet. My dog and I do this twice a day and have friends along the different routes we take. People going by in their different vehicles usually take care to give me and my dog clearance and I nod my thanks. Now I get a wave from many of them. The sense of community begins with me wanting one and willing to invest the effort in creating one. End of protest.
    When you get old sometimes you cannot walk.

    When you get old you can lose your mind. While my mother was driving home from visiting her mother in the nursing home my grandmother would call her saying, "Why don't you ever visit me?" She could not remember the visit she just had.

    So yes it can be lonely.

  2. #52
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    I am not denying that losses and tragedies happen, not for a minute. I don't live on another planet or in a bubble. I also know that each one of us can make a difference. Back to the starfish story.

    If everyone turned off their TV for 3 hours a day and made a point of reaching out to another human being by phone or writing or waving to others, what changes might happen? It is easier to say the job is too big for me or it is too much effort or no one wants to hear/see/talk to me to excuse reaching out to others while respecting appropriate boundaries. I have vented enough on this, I think.
    As Cicero said, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by razz View Post
    OK!!!! I protest this gloom and doom. We can do something about it, each and everyone of us instead of crying; go for a walk greeting your neighbours or find someone to greet. My dog and I do this twice a day and have friends along the different routes we take. People going by in their different vehicles usually take care to give me and my dog clearance and I nod my thanks. Now I get a wave from many of them. The sense of community begins with me wanting one and willing to invest the effort in creating one. End of protest.
    Today would be good day to go for a walk... wind chills -29F. That surely would take care of the doom and gloom hehe.

  4. #54
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    I've had conversations on line with several people today--I surely don't want strangers pounding on my door. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels that way, so "reachers" be forewarned.

  5. #55
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    My great grandmother spent the end of her life in a nursing home. Local youth groups would visit, bringing presents or crafts, doing performances and visiting with residents. And my great grandmother would say “I don’t know why we have to put up with these kids. Can’t they find anything else for them to do?”

  6. #56
    Senior Member Teacher Terry's Avatar
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    Like Razz I meet people walking my dogs. I also talked to my friends and visited my kids. We are making plans to eat in a restaurant when we all are vaccinated. Also discussing what vacations we might take in the fall.

  7. #57
    Senior Member GeorgeParker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JaneV2.0 View Post
    I've had conversations on line with several people today--I surely don't want strangers pounding on my door. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels that way, so "reachers" be forewarned.
    I agree. I'm friendly, but when I'm at home I want to be left alone unless you call or text me in advance to see if I'm available. And I hate both small talk and people who have been taught that they should make friends by asking a lot of questions because "everybody" likes to talk about themself. Look people, it's a casual conversation between two people who just met, not a KGB interrogation! So talk about something we might have in common instead of trying to dig out all the most intimate personal facts about my life, because as soon as you start asking personal questions like how many children I have or what my address is, I'll politely tell you to go to hell in a heartbeat.

    True story: At work some guy I didn't know came over to where I was and said "You ride a motorcycle, don't you." I said "yes." And he says "Where do you live?" and I said "Why would that be any of your business?" So he says "I'm thinking about getting a motorcycle and if you don't live too far from here I was going to come over so you can give me some lessons." He actually thought I would waste my precious non-work time giving a total stranger riding lessons on MY motorcycle, and no doubt for free at that!

    Forget about relying on the kindness of strangers, it's a lot safer to rely on the strangeness of strangers and keep your guard up until you really know them well enough to trust them.

  8. #58
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    And here I was thinking we were talking about the lonely people as were described in the two songs from Alan and Catherine. Silly me.
    As Cicero said, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

  9. #59
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    Quote Originally Posted by razz View Post
    And here I was thinking we were talking about the lonely people as were described in the two songs from Alan and Catherine. Silly me.
    Not silly at all. I like your positive approach to building community, and wish you were my neighbor. We could walk our dogs together!

    I spend a lot of time lately at the nursing home. The problems of dementia are way beyond what is suggested in the Prine song. It's a good song, but with real life dementia, real life nursing homes, real life people at the end stage of life, I wish the answers were as simple as Prine implies.

    But that's not what you were talking about, and I think you are right, that we are all way to plugged in for our own goods. I was just at my son and dil's for example,a nd they do the thing where they are looking at their phone while having a conversation. He always said he would not get a cell phone for that reason, and now he does it, too.

  10. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tybee View Post
    Not silly at all. I like your positive approach to building community, and wish you were my neighbor. We could walk our dogs together!
    Count me in as well, razz. Just getting outside - even in freezing weather for a few minutes! - raises my mood, even if just slightly. I would socially distance walk with you and Tybee (no dog right now )! I'm a "waver" as well. When I walk, I always wave to passing cars. Most people wave back and I've even caught a few smiles as they go by.
    To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." Mahatma Gandhi
    Be nice whenever possible. It's always possible. HH Dalai Lama
    In a world where you can be anything - be kind. Unknown

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