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Thread: Good advice is only good if you're willing to use it

  1. #101
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    There have been a couple of people in my life who could look like a million bucks on very little money, and I always admired them. One was a college friend/roommate of mine who always had such attention to detail it made all the difference, and she was so frugal, but always looked so put together. The other was my MIL who would fight with the supermarket manager over an overcharge of a nickel on her receipt, but she, too, always looked good.

    So, I think IL is really talking about the people who will use as an excuse a perceived need to "invest" in an expensive suit and haircut to spend more than they should. (BTW, we were talking about audiobooks on the other thread, and the first audiobook I read was the Nightingale-Conant cassette tapes of Think and Grow Rich. That was back when I was in the crapper and I would go down to the unfinished basement where the laundry area was, and I'd set up the ironing board and get the laundry basket and my Sony Walkman and listen to the tapes and iron away for hours. So every time I hear someone mention that book, it takes me back to my crapper days in the basement, a Cinderella wife and mother with a few hopes and dreams.)
    Yes that’s it.


    There are people who always look nice because they’re, you know, pretty! And they pay attention to grooming and the fit, texture, pattern, color, style of their clothing. But that’s not what we’re talking about you’re right.

    I am talking about dressing for success meaning borrowing thousands of dollars for clothing to impress.I don’t work in the world where anyone has to wear expensive suits and never have. Oh I know that there are those places, but I don’t work in them and I don’t run in those crowds. But along the same lines are the people who, and we all know them, who throw ip money to impress at the start of a career or business and they invest in all that business stuff that does not move the business along. It is as though they are playing at a business, like a,child.

    I know someone who gets “head shots” taken every few years for some planned Internet business, and then it never gets off the ground. Sometimes we never hear about that idea again.

  2. #102
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    There have been a couple of people in my life who could look like a million bucks on very little money, and I always admired them.
    My mother had good fashion sense in that way. She told me one of the best compliments she ever received came from a fashion conscious 15yo girl who said, "You never dress like any of the other mothers, but you ALWAYS look good." What that girl was too young to recognize was that my mother had a small collection of good quality clothes in classic styles that could be mixed and matched in various ways to fit any occasion. Instead of a closet full of clothes, she had style sense. And when a piece of clothing needed to be replaced she usually bought something very similar to replace it. IOW she dressed pretty much the same in the 1950s, 60s, 70s... And she always looked good in her classic casual style or classic business style.

    Appropros Fashion Trends: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ja2fgquYTCg The Devil Wears Prada -- Blue Sweater Scene

    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    So, I think IL is really talking about the people who will use as an excuse a perceived need to "invest" in an expensive suit and haircut to spend more than they should.
    I agree.

  3. #103
    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GeorgeParker View Post
    Appropros Fashion Trends: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ja2fgquYTCg The Devil Wears Prada -- Blue Sweater Scene
    As a market researcher, I LOVE that scene. I find clothes and clothing choices so fascinating. You can't NOT make a statement about yourself with your clothing choices. If you wear couture, that's a statement. If you wear Ann Taylor, that's a statement. If you wear Carharrt, that's a statement. If you put on a random shirt from Goodwill, that's a statement. If you wear a Steve Jobs style "uniform" that's a statement. You make a statement no matter what you wear, as much as people will deny it, just like Emily in the Devil Wears Prada.
    "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it--every, every minute?" Emily Webb, Our Town
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  4. #104
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    As a market researcher, I LOVE that scene. I find clothes and clothing choices so fascinating. You can't NOT make a statement about yourself with your clothing choices. If you wear couture, that's a statement. If you wear Ann Taylor, that's a statement. If you wear Carharrt, that's a statement. If you put on a random shirt from Goodwill, that's a statement. If you wear a Steve Jobs style "uniform" that's a statement. You make a statement no matter what you wear, as much as people will deny it, just like Emily in the Devil Wears Prada.
    I love that scene too and I know exactly which one it is without even looking at the video clip because I can tell in the URL is the scene that traces the history of the blue sweater. I thought that was fascinating.


    I have no interest in fashion or clothing, but Anna Wintauer causes me to go silent whenever she’s on the screen.She is so odd and dynamic and so laser focused on the frivolous. Yet fashion is a big deal in the art world, I get that. It’s just that so much of fashion is not really very arty.

  5. #105
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    I never thought UL was mean, I just thought he was extremely direct and he liked to be a provocateur much like George Parker.

    UL was pretty unsuccessful as an incel because he sure as hell spent a lot of time out there meeting women. The fact that his range for attraction was narrow hampered him quite a bit.
    Yeah--"mean" wasn't quite the right word. Sloppy writing. My bad.

  6. #106
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JaneV2.0 View Post
    Yeah--"mean" wasn't quite the right word. Sloppy writing. My bad.
    I think “brittle” is a good term. Hard, not flexible. Lotsa people are like this.

    We are who we are and no one needs to change, but there are consequences we may not like to our choices and behaviors.

    I always thought Ukrainian girls would be a good pool for UL to mine Because they would appreciate a clean living, simple living man with a steady income but his heart is not in the white women demographic.

  7. #107
    Senior Member jp1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JaneV2.0 View Post
    Remember, I have no money in the financial markets. I may have, one day. No one I know has ever lost money in real estate in this region.
    I'm not in the exact same region as you, but our real estate market is just as nuts, if not moreso. While I don't personally know anyone who has lost money on real estate, it has definitely happened here, both after the dot com crash and again a few years later in the big financial crash. While looking at real estate listings last summer it was not at all uncommon to see listings where there had been a purchase at a then really high price a year or two before those events unfolded and then another purchase of the property a few years later at a significantly lower price.

  8. #108
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    One of my kids has a fabulous sense of style and clothing. Me, not so much. LOL.

    I enjoyed UL's pictures and posts reflecting his minimalism. While I may not get to that degree of simplifying, I found it very inspirational and motivating.
    To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." Mahatma Gandhi
    Be nice whenever possible. It's always possible. HH Dalai Lama
    In a world where you can be anything - be kind. Unknown

  9. #109
    Senior Member JaneV2.0's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jp1 View Post
    I'm not in the exact same region as you, but our real estate market is just as nuts, if not moreso. While I don't personally know anyone who has lost money on real estate, it has definitely happened here, both after the dot com crash and again a few years later in the big financial crash. While looking at real estate listings last summer it was not at all uncommon to see listings where there had been a purchase at a then really high price a year or two before those events unfolded and then another purchase of the property a few years later at a significantly lower price.
    Yeah--I'm sure someone up here has, I just don't know anyone.

  10. #110
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    The people who go to a lot of trouble to look nice regardless no doubt care about clothes more than I can possibly make myself care. I just want to pick something out that looks decent and the only message I even want to send is: work appropriate.

    But as for things people spend money on, clothes at least are readily visible. Can you believe people actually pay for car washes just so their car leaves a better impression? Really.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

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