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Thread: Good advice is only good if you're willing to use it

  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    Not everyone can be content with their means. People experiencing $2 a day poverty often lurch from crisis to crisis. Many goals are not doable for them. Covid has made things much worse for them after years that saw improvements in tackling extreme poverty.
    But THAT is involuntary poverty, not simple living!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simplemind View Post
    I tried to duck out of the huge office gift exchanges whenever possible.
    I never had any difficulty avoiding workplace gift exchanges. If someone asked me to participate, I'd simply say "I don't do gift exchanges." When they asked why, I'd say "A gift given to someone because you're hoping you'll get an equally good gift in return isn't really a gift -- it's just a business transaction. I only give gifts when I really want to, and I only give gifts when I don't expect to get anything in return." They would always look at me like I was crazy, but being told that once was usually enough to make the point that asking me to participate in a gift exchange was totally useless.

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    Gift exchanges have almost always been voluntary anywhere I worked.

    My bf is one of those who doesn't use his vacation time, either scared of getting in trouble of it, or trying to use it as a savings account in case of job loss (yes you'll get paid the untaken time of course). But I will use my vacation days.
    If you want something to get done, ask a busy person. If you want them to have a nervous breakdown that is.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticNoMore View Post
    Gift exchanges have almost always been voluntary anywhere I worked.
    If I had a job and someone told me participating in a gift exchange was mandatory, or contributing money a party fund was mandatory, or participating in any other social function that required me to contribute time or money was mandatory, I would have told them to take their "mandatory" and shove it.

    Quote Originally Posted by ApatheticNoMore View Post
    My bf is one of those who doesn't use his vacation time, either scared of getting in trouble of it, or trying to use it as a savings account in case of job loss (yes you'll get paid the untaken time of course). But I will use my vacation days.
    All the places I ever worked, you had to use your vacation days within 12 months of the week you earned them. Any days not used within 12 months disappeared. The same rule applied to any comp days you got by working on a paid holiday. If you worked on a holiday you got a vacation day instead of holiday pay, and if you didn't use that day within 12 months you lost it.

  5. #15
    Senior Member herbgeek's Avatar
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    No, simple living is being content living within your means and also having reasonably doable goals.

    Having only modest goals when you're calpable of better things is sloth and lack of ambition, not simplicity
    That's YOUR definition, as Razz had hers. Yours may be equally valid, but you don't get to trump hers just because you say so.

    I've never heard having modest goals defined as sloth. I always called it work life balance.

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    Quote Originally Posted by herbgeek View Post
    That's YOUR definition, as Razz had hers. Yours may be equally valid, but you don't get to trump hers just because you say so.

    I've never heard having modest goals defined as sloth. I always called it work life balance.
    Agree. Plus, we each have our own definition of what is a goal and what is a desired goal. I don't expect mine to be the same as anyone else's, but that doesn't make it any more or less of a valid and valued goal.
    To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." Mahatma Gandhi
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    Quote Originally Posted by happystuff View Post
    Agree. Plus, we each have our own definition of what is a goal and what is a desired goal. I don't expect mine to be the same as anyone else's, but that doesn't make it any more or less of a valid and valued goal.
    I am a big fan of modest goals. I think that is the only way I have ever gotten anything done. It is kind of paralyzing to be accusing oneself of sloth, actually. That kind of judgmentalism can really do a number on one's mental health.

  8. #18
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tybee View Post
    I am a big fan of modest goals. I think that is the only way I have ever gotten anything done. It is kind of paralyzing to be accusing oneself of sloth, actually. That kind of judgmentalism can really do a number on one's mental health.
    Oh right! I love the idea of modest goals or modest expectations as I see them. That is how we achieve contentment in simplicity, by reaching for do-able, reasonable things and being satisfied with simple outcomes.

    But George Parker can accuse me of “sloth” and I just laugh. That characterization is ridiculous, for my financial goals anyway. It might be accurate for my couch sitting time, however.

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    Senior Member catherine's Avatar
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    I'm having a hard time distinguishing between "modest" goals and "reasonable" goals.

    Since we're talking about finances (as opposed to other goals), what are modest goals? I think of "buying a small 3-bedroom bungalow and paying it off in 10 years" as opposed to "buying a McMansion so I can entertain my hundreds of friends and family"

    A "reasonable" goal might be buying a small 3-bedroom bungalow or it might be getting an apartment in a walkable area of town or keeping a mortgage payment no more than 1/3 of one's income...

    I think both of those concepts are open to wide interpretation.

    When it comes to non-financial goals, I like to push myself to achieving large goals, but I think that the way to do it is by achieving small goals. "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time." That kind of thing.
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  10. #20
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by catherine View Post
    I'm having a hard time distinguishing between "modest" goals and "reasonable" goals.

    Since we're talking about finances (as opposed to other goals), what are modest goals? I think of "buying a small 3-bedroom bungalow and paying it off in 10 years" as opposed to "buying a McMansion so I can entertain my hundreds of friends and family"

    A "reasonable" goal might be buying a small 3-bedroom bungalow or it might be getting an apartment in a walkable area of town or keeping a mortgage payment no more than 1/3 of one's income...

    I think both of those concepts are open to wide interpretation.

    When it comes to non-financial goals, I like to push myself to achieving large goals, but I think that the way to do it is by achieving small goals. "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time." That kind of thing.
    I think George Parker has assigned an overly negative connotation to “modest” as in modest goals. We are all talking about the same thing. This is what unites us here, the pursuit of simplicity through achievable, simple life goals.

    While there certainly is such a thing as too low expectations for one’s life and that is sad (though not slothful) I don’t see that problem here.

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