vaccine and family conundrum

[Yppej]

I believe my brother will decline to visit if I tell them about DH which makes me very sad...

Is your brother worried about infecting your DH? Or about DH infecting him? Or both?

[Gardnr]

He can go to a motel for the length of your brother’s visit.

I agree with TT. If you want your family/guests in your own home, hub can leave. It is your life too, not just his. He does not have the right to eliminate your family/friend access.

[razz]

Yppej, she has not shared her DH's choice with her brother as yet and trying to work her way through this by posting here. The US may be different but there is a concern here about how to deal with those who choose not to have the vaccine jab. This issue is going to come up frequently until more is known about the effectiveness of the various vaccines. To the best of my knowledge, but maybe Gardnr or another could clarify, the vaccine causes antibodies and reduces the severity of the covid if infected but does not completely prevent it.
If PT's DH won't take the jab, he is limiting her freedom to have visitors in their home. That is not right.

[iris lilies]

Yppej, she has not shared her DH's choice with her brother as yet and trying to work her way through this by posting here. The US may be different but there is a concern here about how to deal with those who choose not to have the vaccine jab. This issue is going to come up frequently until more is known about the effectiveness of the various vaccines. To the best of my knowledge, but maybe Gardnr or another could clarify, the vaccine causes antibodies and reduces the severity of the covid if infected but does not completely prevent it.
If PT's DH won't take the jab, he is limiting her freedom to have visitors in their home. That is not right.

Oh I don’t know, I limit my DH’s freedom to have visitors in our home. There has been quite a lot of support on this board for women who do not want visitors in their home for various reasons, mainly having to do with shouldering the burden of being a hostess.

This is the same kind of thing, one partner’s wishes or circumstances are in conflict with the other partner’s wishes and circumstances. They will have to figure it out together. As it is often pointed out on this board, guests may stay in a motel and visit at places where it is convenient for all.

[iris lilies]

Also to consider, It might be that pinkytoe’s DH doesn’t like her brother. So he could say to himself “hey I can have a nice little spa vacation away from home by staying in a nice hotel” and everybody could be happy. That is one solution as well, that the DH voluntarily would like to leave.

[Gardnr]

To the best of my knowledge, but maybe Gardnr or another could clarify, the vaccine causes antibodies and reduces the severity of the covid if infected but does not completely prevent it.

You are correct.

[Rogar]

From the CDC site updated April 2. https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019...ed-people.html

• A growing body of evidence suggests that fully vaccinated people are less likely to have asymptomatic infection and potentially less likely to transmit SARS-CoV-2 to others. However, further investigation is ongoing.

[Simplemind]

I would let my family know my husband wasn't vaccinated and wasn't planning on it. I wouldn't feel the need to explain for him. I also wouldn't tell him he had to leave his own home. Me........ I wouldn't mind a get away with family at a place that could accommodate us.

[pinkytoe]

Actually, DH likes my brother(s) quite a bit and vice versa. They don't know as I do that he is not the same person since all this started. He was never politically opinionated or paranoid before so I feel unsure about how to respond to friends and relatives. Even our DD isn't aware of his stance and has already gotten hers. I am leery too of the vaccines but I am going forward as I want to see my grandchildren and others. He isn't there yet or may never be. It is a hard thing to know how to go forward. Perhaps separately in the end.

[iris lilies]

You can only go forward separately in the end because you are two separate people.

When you say you “feel unsure about how to respond to friends and relatives “ have you talked to your husband about what words he would like you to use to represent his point of view to your mutual friends? Or you could say “you will have to ask him. “


When I say my DH is not getting the vaccine, for the moment anyway, our friends invariably ask why. I say he has concerns about messenger RNA and leave it at that. Actually I can’t say more because I don’t know what exactly his concerns are.

I think it will be interesting to see if your daughter sets a boundary to say her father can’t see his grandchildren without a vaccine And what he does if that is the case.