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Thread: Another Friend Who Is A Secret Hoarder

  1. #21
    Senior Member SiouzQ.'s Avatar
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    I find it interesting that my friend is a Spirit Medium/Professional Physic/Counselor and makes a very good living doing "readings" and other physic work with her clients. That is part of the reason why I find it so fascinating that in her home life she is COMPLETELY disorganized with her own stuff...

  2. #22
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SiouzQ. View Post
    I find it interesting that my friend is a Spirit Medium/Professional Physic/Counselor and makes a very good living doing "readings" and other physic work with her clients. That is part of the reason why I find it so fascinating that in her home life she is COMPLETELY disorganized with her own stuff...
    I don’t see these skills or life values or whatever as conflicting. Hmmm, what are you seeing?

    I guess I could uncharitably say “her brain is foggy and she performs Woo “work. “Yeah that fits.” I mean it is all pretty spacey and non-pragmatic, right?

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by SiouzQ. View Post
    I find it interesting that my friend is a Spirit Medium/Professional Physic/Counselor and makes a very good living doing "readings" and other physic work with her clients. That is part of the reason why I find it so fascinating that in her home life she is COMPLETELY disorganized with her own stuff...
    That seems very strange to me, too, as generally, people who work in energy and spirit fields are drawn to serene, peaceful spaces and find clutter disturbing.

  4. #24
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    I don't see the conflicts people point out, I mean suppose one didn't perform anything resembling woo work, they were an engineer let's say. There is nothing that prevents their house from being messy if that's how they are. Ha ok my mom is like that. It's all just silly generalizations, when people may be more compartmentalized. And anyway some people hold on to things out of emotional attachment some for more what seem like more practical reasons (like what if I ever need all those rubber bands I saved huh? jk)
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  5. #25
    Senior Member SiouzQ.'s Avatar
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    With the few hoarders I have worked with, I have still never been able to figure out the inability to even throw away dirty Kleenex and actual trash...one house I went into a long time ago (not to work, but to have some music recorded by the husband) had DIRTY USED BANDAIDS STUCK TO THE BATHROOM WALL. I have never used a bathroom that was so freakin' disgusting in my life. It was the guy's wife that was the hoarder, and he had to/chose to live with it.

  6. #26
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SiouzQ. View Post
    With the few hoarders I have worked with, I have still never been able to figure out the inability to even throw away dirty Kleenex and actual trash...one house I went into a long time ago (not to work, but to have some music recorded by the husband) had DIRTY USED BANDAIDS STUCK TO THE BATHROOM WALL. I have never used a bathroom that was so freakin' disgusting in my life. It was the guy's wife that was the hoarder, and he had to/chose to live with it.
    The reality is probably the hoarding practice has nothing to do with what they do for a living.

  7. #27
    Senior Member iris lilies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SiouzQ. View Post
    With the few hoarders I have worked with, I have still never been able to figure out the inability to even throw away dirty Kleenex and actual trash...one house I went into a long time ago (not to work, but to have some music recorded by the husband) had DIRTY USED BANDAIDS STUCK TO THE BATHROOM WALL. I have never used a bathroom that was so freakin' disgusting in my life. It was the guy's wife that was the hoarder, and he had to/chose to live with it.
    My hoarder cousin who I love and who has been a pretty successful professional person although I haven’t seen his home place in the last 10 years, once confessed to me that he feels like hoarding dollar bills. Not ‘ cause it represents money. I don’t know what that’s about. None of the hoarding, true pathological hoarding, makes any sense.

  8. #28
    Senior Member rosarugosa's Avatar
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    I am a Taurus and my sister is an Aquarius and Mom is a Capricorn. Mom has had periods in her life where I would call her a quasi-hoarder. Sister and I both have stock-up tendencies, but neither of us is a hoarder. We cull our belongings frequently. I do tend to form longer-term attachments to things, but I also tend to try to "buy it for life." Sis really enjoys the act of shopping, so objects flow through her life more, and she would just as soon buy cheaper items that need to be replaced more often.
    I've given a bit of thought to the need to stock up, and I think it's a way to feel some sense of control in life, e.g. "I can't fix Ukraine or cure Mom's Alzheimer's, but I can make sure I never run out of my preferred socks or good quality soap!" I think a lot of behaviors relate to that need to feel some semblance of control. It can be such diverse activities as prayer, keeping lists, making spreadsheets. I believe my sister's shopping behavior has a component of this as well, e.g. "I can't solve my relationship problems, but I can buy a new lamp!"

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by rosarugosa View Post
    I am a Taurus and my sister is an Aquarius and Mom is a Capricorn. Mom has had periods in her life where I would call her a quasi-hoarder. Sister and I both have stock-up tendencies, but neither of us is a hoarder. We cull our belongings frequently. I do tend to form longer-term attachments to things, but I also tend to try to "buy it for life." Sis really enjoys the act of shopping, so objects flow through her life more, and she would just as soon buy cheaper items that need to be replaced more often.
    I've given a bit of thought to the need to stock up, and I think it's a way to feel some sense of control in life, e.g. "I can't fix Ukraine or cure Mom's Alzheimer's, but I can make sure I never run out of my preferred socks or good quality soap!" I think a lot of behaviors relate to that need to feel some semblance of control. It can be such diverse activities as prayer, keeping lists, making spreadsheets. I believe my sister's shopping behavior has a component of this as well, e.g. "I can't solve my relationship problems, but I can buy a new lamp!"
    I was wondering how to explain my tendencies and you have hit the nail on the head, rr! I, too, have "stock up tendencies". It used to be I would hold on to stuff because "I may need this later!". I think/hope I've gotten past a lot of that, but still do stock up on some things. Mainly food. I consider myself a lifelong work-in-progress. Oh, and I'm a Pisces.
    To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." Mahatma Gandhi
    Be nice whenever possible. It's always possible. HH Dalai Lama
    In a world where you can be anything - be kind. Unknown

  10. #30
    Senior Member KayLR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iris lilies View Post
    The reality is probably the hoarding practice has nothing to do with what they do for a living.
    Yeah, one of my secrets is that I like to watch "Hoarders" on tv. I remember one home they featured where the owner collected all his pet's hair and would not part with it. Something going on there ---I think the hoarding was secondary.
    My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already!

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