Hi all, wanted to run this scenario by the group and get your opinions. A few months ago, my son and I talked and he agreed to host Thanksgiving at his house, as it is pretty central for both sets of grandparents, and he wanted to get together with us for Thanksgiving. He said he would do it, and I was relieved, because the plans were set, and it would not involve any hardship for anyone to drive there. It was understood that we all wanted to be together at Thanksgiving.
Yesterday he informed me that dil talked to her mother and changed the plans so now Thanksgiving would be at the mil's house. He instantly wanted to know whether we planned to come. I was upset because I had been really looking forward to Thanksgiving at his house, which we did last year and was really fun. I had been happy to have it sorted out a few months ago. I said I was disappointed that their plans had changed, and not sure if we would be coming. It's a difficult drive to their house, over 2 hours through mountainy roads, and no bathrooms along the way--we are getting old and this is a problem for us. I told him that, feeling really old and infirm and embarrassed.
It bothered me they switched it, that we were now being told to adjust to going to these inlaws house, which we really don't want to do on a holiday, especially since the weather gets iffy around here. It's dumb but I'll be anxious the whole week going into it, worried about snow, as I don't want to cancel the day of, and I don't even want to go in the first place.
But if we don't go then we're by ourselves feeling lonely and let out, and we could have gone, we would be invited.
This is not the first time by a long shot this has happened--the mil is always changing things at the last minute, and we are just supposed to adjust and be grateful to be invited anywhere.
And I'm feeling upset. What would you all do in my shoes?