May have to let this one go . . .

[fidgiegirl]

I was asked to help start a young philanthropy group for an organization I'm involved in, where alumni of the group would get together and eventually it might turn into a giving thing. We have been at it for a year . . . maybe more? No bites from hardly anyone. No one attended our happy hour events (two of them). Our planning group has dwindled to 4, one is paid, 1 kind of comes once in a while. Two of us are regular but sometimes we butt heads the teeniest, weeniest bit. It's not something I'm enjoying too terribly much.

I'm feeling obligated to attend an event I have no interest in. The other planner has gone ahead and booked the date. It is picking grapes and he feeds us and gives us wine. It benefits a private person/business rather than an organization/charitable group. Gosh darn it, the dude needs to pay people to help him pick his grapes, and I don't drink wine. So there.

With only 4 of us involved, though, I feel incredibly unsupportive to just not show up, and I'm a terrible liar. I am free that day - I just don't want to do it. And frankly, I think it's too little time to advertise and get anyone else there, so it would just be us. But it's kind of just steamrolling ahead. If at least I had had my chance to say my piece, but the group still moved ahead with the plan, ok, I could buck up and go. But I'm crossing my arms and stomping my feet and thinking "you can't make me."

I am ready to resign from this group, but not quiiiiiiiite. There are some good opportunities on the horizon to draw some people in, and it would be fun with a few more people.

Ack!

[rosarugosa]

I would work for wine
Unfortunately, the distance is prohibitive.

[iris lily]

I'm not entirely sure I understand, but are these points true?

1) Your group has never taken off on the main intent, right? Which is to do philanthropic activities, yes? (In my mind that means exclusively giving money, but perhaps mine is too narrow a scope.)

2) Lacking the ability to carry out the main purpose, there is a small group of people who are making it entirely a social group with silly time wasting events that do nothing to advance the original goal of the group.

If the above are true I'd say: get out! Get out now. If you don't need more social stimulation and you don't even get along with 1/3 of the group, why bother to continue?

I belong to hobby groups that fill needs I have. Once those needs are no longer being met, I skip out.

It appears the Universe has spoken and there's not enough mojo to get your organization to a place where you all want it to be. Accept the fact that there just isn't enough interest. Let it go. Stories are rife of groups that die and yet continue to flog their members to go on and on in an endeavor that clearly is dead. Your paid person has to do it, she's got no choice, but you have a choice. I would also say that as the salaried leader she's got a certain responsibility to bring resources to the group to gen up interest. It's not entirely on your shoulders.

[fidgiegirl]

Thanks guys. I need to cut it off, I think, but I feel bad. Time to "man up" so to speak and do it.

[reader99]

I picked grapes once 40 years ago. It was very hard, very hot, very sweaty, very buggy. 40 years later I remember it as a negative experience. "Thank you, but I prefer not to do that" is what I would say.