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Thread: The Daily Peeve / Rant

  1. #101
    Senior Member mira's Avatar
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    Today on my morning break at work I went up to the staff room to have some coffee and read a book, as I do nearly every day. A colleague from another department (who I've met once or twice) said to me "You're welcome to come sit with us and maybe, you know, get to know us. We don't bite." I said thank you and that I just like to sit and read on my break.

    I'm annoyed that I let myself get upset over her comment, since it implies that I'm being horrendously unsociable every day. I'm annoyed that my response probably paints me as some kind of socially inept, shy loner.

    I always say hello to colleagues I've met/been introduced to when our paths cross, or chat when they come into our department, which is more than I can say for a lot of them. I walk past a lot of gaze-avoiders in the hall and you're lucky if you get a 'good morning' out of the people in the office adjacent to ours.

    My entire job revolves around talking to people - I don't want to do that on my break OR talk about work on my break, which inevitably happens. I'm sure her intentions were good enough. It's not that I'm too shy to join anyone at breaks... I just choose not to for the reasons I just mentioned! ARGH! I'll be taking my break in our departmental office from now on, I think :/
    Last edited by mira; 12-20-11 at 8:31am.

  2. #102
    Senior Member treehugger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mira View Post
    Today on my morning break at work I went up to the staff room to have some coffee and read a book, as I do nearly every day. A colleague from another department (who I've met once or twice) said to me "You're welcome to come sit with us and maybe, you know, get to know us. We don't bite." I said thank you and that I just like to sit and read on my break. :/
    This is why I always eat my lunch at my desk! It's truly not that I never want to talk to my coworkers. It's simply that breaks, for me, need to be solitary, recharging times. And the barrage of small talk would not feel restfull at all. So, I hear you!

    Kara

  3. #103
    Senior Member mira's Avatar
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    Thank you for the words of solidarity, Kara! I don't want people thinking I am rude or unsociable when I'm not!

  4. #104
    Senior Member treehugger's Avatar
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    I have found that, in general, introverts are much more understanding of different personality types than extroverts (except for around here, of course!). Many extroverts I know assume that someone sitting alone is either lonely and bored and must be chatted with, or, if they don't respond well enough to the chatting, then they must be stuck up. *sigh*

    Kara

  5. #105
    Low Tech grunt iris lily's Avatar
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    my life is so good that I have to find tiny things to complain about. yet never fear, today two things struck me! but sinceI can report on only one today, I'll flip a coin between the consumerist rant and the family rant.
    ....

    Family rant won:

    I've been hearing for years about how one famous patriot was our "ancestor" blah blah brag and yet, when I put pencil to paper to research this, I come up empty. hmmmm, I'm not finding the family connection to this guy. So my aunt sent a pack of papers about him but cha know what? Printouts from websites about this Famous Person do not prove that we are descended from him. doh.

  6. #106
    Junior Member happy with less's Avatar
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    Because I work foodservice at a college/university dining hall, from Sept. til mid Dec I have enjoyed nutritious meals 5 days a wk at work and the other 2 days have been preparing meals from freezer and pantry with a little fresh produce. During those months I've been in a grocery store once a month for the produce. Well today I went to the grocery store for a large stock up and I was SHOCKED at the increase in price of almost everything I was going to buy. I couldn't believe the cost of so many basics, flour, bread, different lettuces... I could go on; I can't say it any other way, just shocked. Why? Have fuel prices caught up to us?
    Last edited by happy with less; 12-21-11 at 12:20am. Reason: for spelling

  7. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by mira View Post
    Today on my morning break at work I went up to the staff room to have some coffee and read a book, as I do nearly every day. A colleague from another department (who I've met once or twice) said to me "You're welcome to come sit with us and maybe, you know, get to know us. We don't bite." I said thank you and that I just like to sit and read on my break.

    I'm annoyed that I let myself get upset over her comment, since it implies that I'm being horrendously unsociable every day. I'm annoyed that my response probably paints me as some kind of socially inept, shy loner.

    I always say hello to colleagues I've met/been introduced to when our paths cross, or chat when they come into our department, which is more than I can say for a lot of them. I walk past a lot of gaze-avoiders in the hall and you're lucky if you get a 'good morning' out of the people in the office adjacent to ours.

    My entire job revolves around talking to people - I don't want to do that on my break OR talk about work on my break, which inevitably happens. I'm sure her intentions were good enough. It's not that I'm too shy to join anyone at breaks... I just choose not to for the reasons I just mentioned! ARGH! I'll be taking my break in our departmental office from now on, I think :/
    Speaking as an extrovert, I think the subtextual message in the invitation was that this pereon would really like to get to know you. May I recommend that you respond to that invitation, and then frame your need for alone time? You don't need to comply with an invitation to appreciate the intent... what pops to mind is something like this: 'thank you! I appreciate your kindness. Right now what I really need most is some quiet time, which I can imagine you understand.'

    Honoring the opening and the connection while keeping your boundaries is possible...

  8. #108
    Wildflower
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    People that toss their chewing gum out their car window onto the street, in parking lots, on sidewalks, etc. only for others to step in!

  9. #109
    Senior Member mira's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by redfox View Post
    Speaking as an extrovert, I think the subtextual message in the invitation was that this pereon would really like to get to know you. May I recommend that you respond to that invitation, and then frame your need for alone time? You don't need to comply with an invitation to appreciate the intent... what pops to mind is something like this: 'thank you! I appreciate your kindness. Right now what I really need most is some quiet time, which I can imagine you understand.'

    Honoring the opening and the connection while keeping your boundaries is possible...
    Thank you for that insight. I did say to begin with, thank you for the offer, I'm ok here just reading right now. But then she persevered. In those sorts of situations, I normally feel so caught off guard and personally affronted, that my emotions overtake any rational thinking .
    Last edited by mira; 12-21-11 at 1:47pm.

  10. #110
    Low Tech grunt iris lily's Avatar
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    Another Christmas, another full size garbage sack full of crap to deal with.
    Any more I'm experienced in just moving the **** out the door by making 3 piles:

    Pile to keep (the smallest)

    Pile to take to Goodwill

    Pile to go to dumpster

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