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Thread: My dear husband is in Pallative Care with days to weeks to live...

  1. #1
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    My dear husband is in Pallative Care with days to weeks to live...

    Please send us all of your good thoughts and prayers that he can go without too much pain and be as peaceful as possible for him, myself and family.
    He was admitted to hospital under Pallative Care on Wed and we had been doing it at home for the previous six weeks with help for from Family Doctor and Community Nurse, but he was starting to lose his balance and I was too afraid for him.
    Story was diagnosed with Stage 4, Grade 4, Kidney Cancer Aug 2010,
    surgery Nov 4, 2010 and then a chemo drug starting Jan 4, 2011. The CT scan
    April 2011 showed he had skrinkage and things looked promising, but by end of June 2011 the drug had stopped working and the cancer had spread very aggressively to the plureal (sp?) around the left lung and a spot on the spine. This past summer has had 4 trip to emerg with two admissions, serveral procedures and one surgery to try and remove fluid none of which worked. Also, a second chemo drug that just caused a lot of side effects and did not help at all. A third hospital stay 7 weeks ago when the good kidney failed, hemogolin low and other issues. They settled all that down the then made the move to palliative care. So hard to be told this and feel so helpless except to keep him as comfortable as possible. This is a very loved man of 67 who was so well, fit and still helping in his club, community, friends and family. My only comfort at this time is how much our wonderful son, daugther and dil, all other family and friends have been here for us.
    I know I will be okay in time but right now it is really difficult to see that.
    Thank you for letting me share this with you all...

  2. #2
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    Sending my deepest strength to you and your husband. Take care of yourself.

  3. #3
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    You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers...hoping for a peaceful and painless passing for your husband! God bless you.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Azure's Avatar
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    I'm so sorry Danna. We just lost my MIL to lung cancer a few weeks back so I have an inkling of what you're going through. I'm praying for you all.

  5. #5
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    Danna, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope your husband passes peacefully and painlessly. May God console you in this time of difficulty.

    Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death (or through the darkest valley),
    I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
    --the 23nrd Psalm.

  6. #6
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    my deepest condolences to you, your husband and family as you want through this bardo and into the next (in buddhism, a bardo is a phase of death, and there are several phases -- the first as coming toward death). I will also pray for a peaceful passing into the next bardo, and likewise for your family as you move into the more subtle layers of grief from the loss.

    blessings on you all.

  7. #7
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    I am so sorry for you and your family. Sending good wishes to make the best of the days to come.

  8. #8
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    Heartfelt condolences to you, danna. Best wishes to you and your family as you bear this time of sadness and coming loss.

  9. #9
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    danna thank you for allowing us to share this burden...I hope it is just a little bit lighter. Please know that this community of strangers who are now friends are sending positive energy to you. As my mother was dying all my efforts went into keeping "grace & dignity" in her passage.

  10. #10
    Senior Member razz's Avatar
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    Sending thoughts of loving support to you and your family at this time.
    As Cicero said, “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

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