Community-building outside of church

[mira]

I am not a religious person, so I don't ever intend to get involved with any church. However, I do really love the tight, active and welcoming communities that churches build.

Are there any types of secular organisations that you could recommend that generate the same type of community cohesion?

I'm technically a member of a local community organisation, but their meetings and events are sporadic and normally only held for a specific purpose (yearly street parties and halloween parties, for example).

[awakenedsoul]

I find that I'm meeting really spiritual people through Fiber Arts groups and knitting classes. We seem to have a lot in common. They are interested in yoga, Chinese medicine, self healing, and organic gardening. I may join a group of people here who grow rare fruits, too. I usually get along well with other gardeners. Oh, and volunteering is another good way to meet like minded people. I volunteered to plant the vegetable garden at our local elementary school, and the women there were very open and friendly.
Sorry, I know you said secular, but I haven't met people that way recently.

[fidgiegirl]

I am also seeking something similar. There is something about churches that (for better or worse) makes people commit for the long haul. It's hard to get that in a volunteer group ...

I have often thought that to achieve such a group, I'd have to create it myself. And I don't really take any community-building actions to speak of. Once in a while I volunteer for girl scouts, but it's not the same. It's been bugging me, and I've been thinking of doing things like trying to invite friends or family to dinner once a week, or put nice little notes on neighbor's houses when we notice a nice improvement, etc. but I just haven't!

We are interested In becoming involved with animal service, I.e. therapy dogs, but not sure you find people-community there, either.

Looking forward to others' thoughts ...

[pinkytoe]

I think if you get involved in whatever interests you, a community appears. Over the past few years I have signed up for classes, events and volunteer activities involving native plants, birding and tree-related things. I find that many of the same people show up at each and that slowly a community of sorts has evolved wherein we all share the same purpose of celebrating and promoting the natural world. Eventually, things like pot-lucks and social gatherings increase.

[bunnys]

Good post. And you're right. It's a lot easier when you're associated with a church--I'm not either.

There's something about people when they belong to a church. They're committed for the long haul. Good, bad or ugly.

[iris lily]

I will sound like a broken record here but to keep it brief: my neighborhood has all of the social stuff you are looking for in a community.

For instance, just last night, there was a neighborhood alert about a dropped off pitbull dog, dumped in our park. On my evening walk I encountered several people who had responded to one neighbor's EGroups post to come and help catch the doggie. I knew everyone in the group, they had come from all 4 corners of the 'nabe. This is just one example of hundreds of activities that go on here regularly: planned, spur of the moment, etc.

It's a wonderful place to live. We are not exactly unique in St. Louis in this regard but we have the strongest social structure of any other neighborhood.

[iris lily]

I think if you get involved in whatever interests you, a community appears. Over the past few years I have signed up for classes, events and volunteer activities involving native plants, birding and tree-related things. I find that many of the same people show up at each and that slowly a community of sorts has evolved wherein we all share the same purpose of celebrating and promoting the natural world. Eventually, things like pot-lucks and social gatherings increase.

I agree strongly with this. Outside of our neighborhood activites, I belong to a few hobby groups and each one grows into a little community. The people who circle the Missouri Botanical Gardens seem to pop up a lot in my life. I guess that is our place of worship and the being we pay homage to is cultivated Mother Nature.

[Lainey]

Good topic, Mira. I was just thinking of this same thing. I attended a funeral last month for an elderly man that was very well attended. One reason for the big crowd was his being a military veteran, and also a member of a good-size church. I was impressed with the caring, kindness and overall camaraderie among the church members.

I'm not a church member or a vet, so have to look elsewhere for this. I have some cherished long-time friends, and recently I've made new friends through some meet-up groups, and that's been fun, so that's one option. We'll see if it goes to the next level.

I agree about pursuing your own special interests with outside groups and see what develops naturally. I also think it's especially important as one gets older because it's easy to have your world shrink (friends moving away, family and/or friends dying, etc.) so you have to make a conscious effort to have mixed age groups in your world.

[try2bfrugal]

Most of the people we know that have a lot of friends just belong a a bunch of civic, volunteer or hobby clubs like a boating club, archery, rock collecting, bridge group, Rotary club, Moose Lodge, Soroptimists, the Sierra Club, art appreciation, book clubs or do volunteer work. We are not exactly role models for community and social involvement, but we have started joining a number of hobby groups and have been building up more of a social network this way.

[razz]

I am between membership in a church.
I happened to tell a couple of friends about one of The Great Courses that I was ordering and they were really interested. So I invited them to listen to the audio CD with me. We rotated between houses and the group grew to 6. Then some from that group with added new-to-me friends wanted to walk the local old rail lines which had been beautifully converted into hiking trails. I now do that with a wider circle of friends as time permits twice weekly.
What about a coffee group once a week with just one friend and then add slowly?