Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 15 of 15

Thread: I need some feedback on how to act in this situation, please.

  1. #11
    Senior Member RosieTR's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Northern CO
    Posts
    809
    I think it's pretty natural to feel bitter about any new person in a parent's life, especially after a long marriage and especially if there is a divorce rather than a death. My friends whose parents found new "friends" after the loss of their marriage one way or another had a hard time with it. Treating this person gracefully will be more a reflection on you as a person than your father, and hopefully send that message to your customers. If it's a small town, there will be talk. There is always talk. Your close friends, whom you feel can be discreet, would be good sounding boards/support. Otherwise, I wholeheartedly agree with Llamo. To stick to facts, some phrases may help: "I'm sorry, but I'd prefer not to talk about that right now" or "You know, even I don't know all the details at this point" and/or "Well, you might ask (dad) about that, because it's really his business rather than mine" etc.
    As for dad, not getting much more information it's hard to say what's going through his mind. He may just be wildly reacting to the whole thing and not really thinking about how this might be making you feel, or your son feel. It's sometimes difficult to see other points of view when you are in a lot of pain yourself, which may be where he is. If he has a history of being inconsiderate, this may be right in character, however. If the latter is true, you'll have to decide how much you're willing to put up with or go out of your way for.

  2. #12
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    4,188
    From your fathers perspective and not knowing the whole "dirty laundry". He lost his relationship and has a jagged one with you (from your post) and hopes to bring someone who he feels comfortable with, along.
    You both are looking for a comfort zone place to work from, as I see it.

  3. #13
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Phoenix
    Posts
    608
    Being a bimbo doesn't necessarily mean she's money-grubbing. What I mean is, she may be young and/or beautiful. Don't hold it against her if she is unless/until she proves her priorities one way or another.
    Bad spellers of the world, UNTIE!
    formerly known as Paula P

  4. #14
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    459
    Well, things turned out ok Sunday night. My dad brought his friend into the restaurant and directly to the kitchen so that he could introduce us all properly. I was really swamped at the time so I simply told her that it was nice to meet her and that I hoped she would enjoy her dinner. They sat in a booth alone but my dad chatted a bit with the table next to them where there were several people that he knew. I served them just as I did everyone else and when they left she and I exchanged the usual pleasantries and she suggested we get together again sometime when we can actually chat.

    The only comment that I heard from anyone was from a guy that went through something similar 2 years ago. He said it was nice to see that my dad was moving on and not sitting in the house waiting to die.
    I didn't want to look back at the end of my life or after some great catastrophe and think, 'How happy I used to be then if only I'd realized it.'
    Gretchen Rubin-- The Happiness Project

  5. #15
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    2,351
    I'm glad to hear it worked out better than expected.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •