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Thread: Weekend getaways

  1. #41
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    She is bearing the risks of the birth control side effects.

    Condoms and vasectomies do not have these side effects. Condoms also protect against viruses like HPV which men are generally not tested for, and which can cause cervical cancer. I don't see one shred of unselfishness here. Quite the opposite. But then again you have stated before that you see women of a certain age as desperate to marry, and so think there is a power imbalance that you can exploit.
    She is also reaping the rewards of not having to worry about getting pregnant.

    Women have a smorgasbord of birth control options. Many have little to no side effects. They are also reversible. They are also very cheap. They are in full effect at all times.
    Must be nice to have all these options...

    V-sec have side effects.

    Condoms do not protect against HPV.

    Wait... power balance I can exploit? What the heck are you even talking about?

  2. #42
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    The debts I was referring to are ones you might incur jointly, not ones you have already, and which she could be stuck with if you don't pay.
    I could be stuck with jointly incurred debts if she chose not to pay.

  3. #43
    Yppej
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ultralight View Post
    I could be stuck with jointly incurred debts if she chose not to pay.
    Yes, but the trip is for her family and friends to check you out.

  4. #44
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yppej View Post
    Yes, but the trip is for her family and friends to check you out.
    The trip is also for me to assess her family. It is also so I can see if there is a marked and/or significant change in behavior in her when she is around her family.

    Like a job interview, the employer is not just interviewing you. You are also interviewing the employer.

    I have actually met some of her family already. Back when I took the cruise you had an emotional hemorrhage over I spent that entire time with one of her sisters and brother in law.

    Good folks, real salt of the earth. They had the cabin right net to us for 4 days and then we shared a two bedroom Air BnB for 3 days. So it was close quarters!

    Her sister made it plain as day that she wants/expects me to marry her sister, or to move in that direction in good faith.

    But Yppej, let me set your mind at ease about my ladyfriend and I. Our relationship is rather egalitarian. When she comes over to my apartment, I do most of the cooking. When I go to her house, she does most of the cooking.

    When we go on dates, I pay about 6 or 7 times out of ten.

    We tend to make decisions together, though I have made "executive" decisions in a few instances that needed it.

    Sure, there are non-negotiable issues. Mine are:
    -She must convert to minimalism, for the most part
    -There can be no corporal punishment of dogs
    -She has to live a fairly active/healthy lifestyle
    -She has to use birth control

    Etc.

    She has her non-negotiable issues too:
    -She expects me to be monogamous
    -I have to work steady
    -I have to be quite financially responsible

    Etc.

  5. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ultralight View Post

    Women have a smorgasbord of birth control options. Many have little to no side effects. They are also reversible. They are also very cheap. They are in full effect at all times.
    Must be nice to have all these options...

    V-sec have side effects.

    Condoms do not protect against HPV.
    No side effects? You gotta be shittin' me!

    Cheap? Oh hell no they are not!

    V-sec: and what are these side effects? Do pray tell how it wreaks havoc on the body like Birth control hormones for women.

    You are living under some kind of self-protective shell.

  6. #46
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gardnr View Post
    No side effects? You gotta be shittin' me!

    Cheap? Oh hell no they are not!

    V-sec: and what are these side effects? Do pray tell how it wreaks havoc on the body like Birth control hormones for women.

    You are living under some kind of self-protective shell.
    I have personally known and dated women who said the side effects:
    -Did not appear for them
    -Went away completely after a cycle or two
    -Were very, very mild and worth it
    -Also, there is a lot of research showing how mild the side effects are for the vast majority of women

    Actually, yes, birth control for women is very cheap. Most insurance plans cover it completely (as is the case with my ladyfriend).

    I hate to "mansplain" but you got some learnin' to do today.

    This is from Planned Parenthood (an organization I donate to because I agree with their mission).

    "What is the price range for birth control?
    The birth control pill, patch, and ring usually cost about $20–$50 per month. The birth control shot costs about $30–$75 per shot. The shot protects against pregnancy for 12 weeks.
    Some health care providers require that women have exams before they’re prescribed hormonal birth control, and others do not. If needed, an exam usually costs about $35–$250.
    Many Planned Parenthood health centers offer reduced-fee services to teens with little or no income. To find out about birth control costs at a Planned Parenthood health center near you, contact your local Planned Parenthood health center."

    Boom! Here is where you say: "I stand corrected."

  7. #47
    Senior Member Ultralight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gardnr View Post

    V-sec: and what are these side effects? Do pray tell how it wreaks havoc on the body like Birth control hormones for women..
    From Mayo Clinic:

    Side effects right after surgery can include:

    • Bleeding or a blood clot (hematoma) inside the scrotum.
    • Blood in your semen.
    • Bruising of your scrotum.
    • Infection of the surgery site.
    • Mild pain or discomfort.
    • Swelling.


    Also: Dementia associated with V-sec:

    https://www.northwestern.edu/newscen...vasectomy.html

  8. #48
    Senior Member herbgeek's Avatar
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    Oh puleeze UL! You can't compare a temporary couple of days discomfort to the effects of hormones over a women's reproductive lifetime. Boo hoo I have an ouchie for a couple of days is not increased risks of some cancers, reduced libido, brain fog etc over many years (and the cancer risk may be permanent even if birth control is halted).

    I thought the effects of the pill were worth it at the time too, and then I went off it when I hit 40, and BAM, I got back to how I used to be. I thought it was just getting older that had made me that way, but it was the hormones. There are other non hormonal methods (I'd used a copper IUD) but those also can have bad side effects (and I had them, but won't list them here because too graphic).

  9. #49
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    Tubals and vasectomies are known for their low side effect profiles, as compared with hormonal methods. Probably the lowest side effects are from condoms. But they also allow the most baby surprises.

    I think UL should just admit that he is scared of a vasectomy. 😄

  10. #50
    Williamsmith
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tammy View Post
    Tubals and vasectomies are known for their low side effect profiles, as compared with hormonal methods. Probably the lowest side effects are from condoms. But they also allow the most baby surprises.

    I think UL should just admit that he is scared of a vasectomy. 😄
    Someone as vehemently against having children would have had a vasectomy a long time ago. I think quite the contrary, UL is not at all afraid of the procedure. He just secretly wants to preserve the option to have a child just in case he might fall head over heels for a woman who wants to procreate.

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