View Full Version : Motherhood and newfangled ways of doing things
I had four kids in the late 70s/80s. As was usual at the time, my contractions told me when the baby was going to be born.
These days there are a lot more cases of induced labor for a variety of reasons. I bring this up, because DIL, who is due March 26 (my birthday, actually), is probably going to choose to have her baby on March 21, and have the labor induced. There is no medical reason for her to be induced--she just wants to know "what's going on." She has chosen March 21 because it's the first day of spring.
Apparently my son is not for this--yelling to his son in utero, "Get out while you can, before your mother kicks you out!"
Any thoughts? She asked me what i think. I told her it's her baby so I think she should do what she wants to do, but I wouldn't do it. I like to let Nature take its course. I don't know if that's old-fashioned.
Gardenarian
3-18-14, 5:39pm
I'm surprised that any doctor would agree to do this.
This seems wrong to me on so many levels that I am not sure how to respond.
Yes, you're right, Gardenarian... there are hospital metrics in NJ that are tracking induced labor to try to minimize them. I've always been appalled at working women who induce in order to be able to take an important conference call, for instance. So I'm really surprised by DIL, because she has no medical or business reason to induce. No reason period, actually. I do know that she's a control freak, and I think that's what this is all about. But still, it's not my child.
I've noticed this trend, as well. My own daughter who recently had a baby (induced) had trouble breastfeeding. Her milk just never really came in very well; the baby was very fussy (I think she was starving/big baby).
Her prior two experiences with nursing were highly successful. So we're thinking the whole pitocin-letdown process was never given a chance to engage and work for her. It was heartbreaking for my daughter, she wanted to nurse so much. But, then, she wanted more for the baby to be born at 39 wks.
Around here it is getting harder for doctors to induce for non-medical reasons. The hospital I give birth at won't induce you before 41 weeks without a medical reason. I, unfortunately, have had to be induced before 38 weeks all but twice for things like PROM (water breaking early) or preeclampsia. I wouldn't recommend it. If you want I can tell your DIL my 48 hour induction and failed epidural story from a month ago. :) I say this as someone who has given birth six times, as annoying as pregnancy is at the end, I would gladly be pregnant longer if I could ditch the pitocin.
My dd was born in the early 80s at three weeks overdue. My son three years later was also induced after a week of consistent contractions. He was two weeks early. guess my body doesn't know how to birth a baby.
My dd had two inductions too. Both of hers were due to very large babies. Her first was a DAY over and 8 lbs 12 oz. The second was a week early but they predicted up to ten pounds!
My granddaughter came through being induced as well - at two weeks early. The mom went for a well baby check and the fetal heart rate was irregular. Baby was crushing the cord.
My family skews the numbers, that's for sure!
Today's newspaper had an article about a movement to let babies come naturally, and that means slow down expectations of when they should pop out. It seems counter to what you describe.
The article was about reducing the number of C-Sections by lowering expectations for everyone as to how fast the babe would appear. It encouraged the mom to not time contractions, stay home and walk around and be in no rush to get to the hospital.
Induction is correlated with higher c section rates, from what I remember reading. I would never choose it until after 43 weeks. Due date is a range from 37-43 weeks. We have forgotten that ...
When you all talk about "overdue" babies: by whose measure? Do physicians really know how long that baby has been cooking? I am skeptical.
edited to add: Tammy added a guideline that makes sense to me. Not all babies are meant to appear at the same time.That said, 43 weeks?!!! That's 11 months PG. egad, I would say GET THAT KID OUT OF ME!!!
Teacher Terry
3-18-14, 8:59pm
When I was pregnant with my 3rd the doc wanted to induce me 3 weeks early for his convenience since we were moving & he wanted the $. I said no way-this was 1980 and we moved & delivered naturally. During those 3 weeks I developed pre-ecalampsia and the new doc was worried that his lungs were not developed enough so I was on bed rest trying to keep him in the oven so to speak. He arrived exactly on his due date and was fine. I would never do it unless totally necessary. I have had friends that had to be induced and they said much more painful then going into labor gradually.
I think the AMA has put out to no longer induce before 40 weeks due to complications...not sure. But, I agree. I'm always shocked at the level of inducement, and the level of acceptance of women to be induced. They just take the doctor's word that is necessary and the way to go. Of course, sometimes it is. But based on how many women tell me they are being induced, I know it isn't going with nature. Having had all 4 of my kids at home, I'm an oddity.
When you all talk about "overdue" babies: by whose measure? Do physicians really know how long that baby has been cooking? I am skeptical.
edited to add: Tammy added a guideline that makes sense to me. Not all babies are meant to appear at the same time.That said, 43 weeks?!!! That's 11 months PG. egad, I would say GET THAT KID OUT OF ME!!!
Not to be argumentative...but the average length of gestation is 40 weeks. How is 43 weeks 11 months?
My dd was born in the early 80s at three weeks overdue. My son three years later was also induced after a week of consistent contractions. He was two weeks early. guess my body doesn't know how to birth a baby.
My dd had two inductions too. Both of hers were due to very large babies. Her first was a DAY over and 8 lbs 12 oz. The second was a week early but they predicted up to ten pounds!
My granddaughter came through being induced as well - at two weeks early. The mom went for a well baby check and the fetal heart rate was irregular. Baby was crushing the cord.
My family skews the numbers, that's for sure!
All but one of my pregnancies was 43 to 44 weeks long.
Not to be argumentative...but the average length of gestation is 40 weeks. How is 43 weeks 11 months?
I guess I'm unable to do mathematics tonight. But I figured
36 weeks is 9 months
40 weeks is 10 months
43 weeks is 10+ months
Look, I've never had children so I only know of gestation as "9 months." I never thought about it in terms of weeks. Is my math off? I can't see how people can be having 10 and nearly 11 month pregnancies but I can't see my math error, either. Too late now, will go to bed, Maybe it will be clear in the morning.
I had one induced birth due to a medical problem. It was a quick but horribly painful labor compared to my other two natural births. I wouldn't recommend it unless absolutely necessary. Just to do it on a whim is wrong on so many levels in my opinion...
Actually a month is roughly 4.33 weeks (52 weeks in a year/12 months). Most months are 30 or 31 days, not 28 days. So 9 months is roughly 39 weeks.
My DS was stubbornly breech --- we tried everything, including an EXTREMELY painful external version at 36 or 37 weeks. I felt worse after that than after the C-section I ended up having a few days before his due date. In that case, the Dr. recommended the c-section come before the due date because it was better to have it prior to labor starting -- less risk of complications with a planned c than with an emergency one once labor has started, apparently.
For DD, I wanted to try VBAC, but she didn't want to come out. I had a bout of false labor at about 38 weeks, but got sent home when it didn't progress. When we got to nearly a week after her due date, my OB suggested we schedule the c, with the caveat that if labor started before that I could still try the VBAC. You can't be induced when you've already had a c section due to the high risk of placental rupture. DD was happy where she was, so 9 days after her due date we went ahead with the c section. OB said later that it was a good thing we did -- the placenta had started to calcify, and there could have been complications if we had waited longer.
I am very happy that I had the option of having elective c-sections for both my kids -- my son was very large and I have a small pelvis and a tilted uterus, and in an earlier era may well have died in childbirth. But the notion of inducing for non-medical reasons is very strange to me....
fidgiegirl
3-19-14, 8:47am
I guess I'm unable to do mathematics tonight. But I figured
36 weeks is 9 months
40 weeks is 10 months
43 weeks is 10+ months
Look, I've never had children so I only know of gestation as "9 months." I never thought about it in terms of weeks. Is my math off? I can't see how people can be having 10 and nearly 11 month pregnancies but I can't see my math error, either. Too late now, will go to bed, Maybe it will be clear in the morning.
We didn't realize it's measured in weeks either. But indeed! No one talks about it in terms of months at our medical appointments, etc., only in terms of weeks. Took me a while to figure it all out!
Has anyone seen The Business of Being Born? Interesting.
From my short experience being preggers and through limited contact with birth education class and the birth community, I think in the Twin Cities we have a pretty progressive birth culture. While I'm a bit worried about being railroaded into some kind of unnecessary medical procedure (being the good ol' control freak that I am), I've been reassured that it's not really typically the way our hospital works, and our midwife practice certainly isn't into doing anything that isn't necessary.
We're also planning to have a doula (kind of like a birth coach) at the birth. Both DH and I feel good about that, being our first time with this experience. I'm sure we would have done fine without her but I just feel that much better with her being there. Interestingly, Minnesotacare (I believe our Medicaid) pays for a doula because the outcomes so much better when one is involved. I find that very interesting. I do not yet know if our private insurer will reimburse us for the doula services. I am always on the lookout for an alternative career, but more so lately, and have been really intrigued the world of the doula.
Actually a month is roughly 4.33 weeks (52 weeks in a year/12 months). Most months are 30 or 31 days, not 28 days. So 9 months is roughly 39 weeks.
So that's where I went wrong. Not that this math matters, but it was bugging me.
A calcified cord is interesting, I didn't know what happened to the babies who refused to come out.
I think the AMA has put out to no longer induce before 40 weeks due to complications...not sure. But, I agree. I'm always shocked at the level of inducement, and the level of acceptance of women to be induced. They just take the doctor's word that is necessary and the way to go. Of course, sometimes it is. But based on how many women tell me they are being induced, I know it isn't going with nature. Having had all 4 of my kids at home, I'm an oddity.
I have read studies linking inducement to autism, and I've also read those studies being refuted (interestingly, the article panning the study was in Forbes magazine--too many female execs wanting to continue scheduling babies between business calls?)
Also, in my short amount of research since yesterday, I also found what Yarrow said to be true--inducements spur very fast onset of labor, and more painful.
I know that every birth experience is different (Tiam, I love yours!) and that not all women can have simple, straightforward births. I was really lucky to have taken Lamaze and have been able to practice it and had nothing unexpected occur during the birth process, enabling pretty routine, drug-free births. I just really do believe that unless medically necessary it's better for the baby and the mom's body to cooperate on the timing and leave it at that.
Four of my co-workers had babies about six months ago. It was interesting to watch their progress and hear their individual birthing details as they were all very different. They were all first babies for the moms. Two were induced though I believe they were only a week or so over. Two c-sections. I would imagine that ob gyns have to do a lot of things they might not otherwise do just to cover their rears in case something goes awry.
Oh gosh catherine...........that's very disconcerting! There's absolutely no reason to induce, unless there's fetal distress or they are way over-due.
Best of luck to your grand baby. Most of them know exactly when the time is right.
Miss Cellane
3-19-14, 11:15am
One of my sisters-in-law had a scheduled C-section with her first. But that was because they could see on the ultrasounds that one hip was dislocated and the baby's leg was sticking out to one side. A regular birth would not have led to a good outcome for one or both of them.
That baby had multiple physical disabilities and several severe medical problems that were not evident before birth. He was on a ventilator and needed home nurses when her second child was born. Because they needed to schedule 24 hours a day of home nurses for the time SIL would be in the hospital with the new baby and there were other considerations due to the first baby's needs, they decided to do a planned induction. And they did another planned induction with the third baby for the same reasons. Everything was scheduled for a week before the actual due date, and tests were done to make sure the babies were ready to be born. (And plans were also made, as best they could be, for the babies arriving on their own, early.)
Another SIL was induced two weeks after her due date because they were worried about the size of the baby. That SIL is a very tiny, petite woman. The baby almost but not quite broke the family record for the largest baby, at 11 pounds, 10 ounces. For her second baby, she was ready to be induced again and earlier, as the first birth had been difficult, but that baby arrived on time, at 10 pounds, 14 ounces. He looked so tiny next to his brother.
I think there are good medical reasons to induce labor. But designer birth dates? Convenience? I may be old-fashioned, but I think most babies arrive when they are supposed to--when they are ready to survive in world. It may not hurt the baby to come a week or so early, but it may not help them, either.
My DS was 1 week early and DD 2 weeks early, but they were ready to come out. Many times the date is a bit off to start with.
It's one thing to be early when the baby decides to come...........but quite another if it's early because the mom or doc wants it to come.
What is this world coming to??
Kelli, I think our doula was what saved me from a C section. I think it's great that you are going to have one. Veronica was sunny side up and I was stalled out forever. If the doula hadn't had her bag of tricks to help get her in a good position I really think we would have been out of luck. I've been thinking about you lately and keeping you and baby in my prayers for a smooth birth experience.
Kelli, I think our doula was what saved me from a C section. I think it's great that you are going to have one. Veronica was sunny side up and I was stalled out forever. If the doula hadn't had her bag of tricks to help get her in a good position I really think we would have been out of luck. I've been thinking about you lately and keeping you and baby in my prayers for a smooth birth experience.
Yes, Kelli, I'm thinking of you, too!!! You're due very soon, right? I agree with Stella that the doula is a great idea. I didn't have a doula, but coincidentally for my first birth my Lamaze coach (an obstetric RN) happened to be on call when I was in labor and she stayed with me the whole time, coaching me and DH. Wow, that was worth the price of the Lamaze class!
fidgiegirl
3-19-14, 6:22pm
Kelli, I think our doula was what saved me from a C section. I think it's great that you are going to have one. Veronica was sunny side up and I was stalled out forever. If the doula hadn't had her bag of tricks to help get her in a good position I really think we would have been out of luck. I've been thinking about you lately and keeping you and baby in my prayers for a smooth birth experience.
I am so glad for you that you didn't have to have a c-section! Thank you for the prayers!
fidgiegirl
3-19-14, 6:23pm
Yes, Kelli, I'm thinking of you, too!!! You're due very soon, right? I agree with Stella that the doula is a great idea. I didn't have a doula, but coincidentally for my first birth my Lamaze coach (an obstetric RN) happened to be on call when I was in labor and she stayed with me the whole time, coaching me and DH. Wow, that was worth the price of the Lamaze class!
Yes, due in about 3 weeks. I am getting pretty ready!!
rodeosweetheart
3-21-14, 6:25pm
Kelli, my daughter-in-law had a doula and a midwife for a homebirth. She was disappointed with the midwife but LOVED the doula and felt it made all the difference for a good birth experience. So fingers crossed for a short, easy labor and an easy delivery!
Speaking of which, I got a text from DS that their baby has just been born! Wow!
fidgiegirl
3-21-14, 6:56pm
Yippee!!! You are a grandma!!!!
rodeosweetheart
3-22-14, 7:04am
Catherine, congratulations! It is a wonderful thing, and you love them so much:)
Yes, DH and I saw him last night and of course he's gorgeous! Certainly a prettier baby than his dad frankly (haha--the day after my son was born, a stranger pointed to him in the nursery and said to the person he was with, "Look at THAT funny-looking baby!" DS grew up very handsome but I always thought that was hilarious).
What hit me sitting there as his grandmother in her 60s is the enormity of his innocence and the magnitude of the journey ahead. The first day of life! And yesterday he was curled up inside his mother's womb and today he's going "what the heck is going on here??" He was blinking at the light, making funny noises, sneezing, yawning and trying to suck his mitten-covered fingers. Life is truly a miracle.
wonderful about that new baby!
Congratulations Catherine!
IshbelRobertson
3-22-14, 10:28am
Congratulations to your family.
catherine
3-22-14, 11:03am
Thanks, everybody!
And also Stella, congratulations on Veronica Rose! I love the name. You are one busy lady!
leslieann
3-22-14, 12:02pm
Ahh, babies being born...such a lovely bit of news. So happy to hear of the new addition to Stella's brood and your new grandson, Catherine.
Gardenarian
3-22-14, 12:57pm
Congratulations Catherine!
Great news, Catherine, and enjoy having fun with him!
Congrats Grandma, and enjoy! :)
Catherine, did they induce? congrats on being a grandma!
I think this is one problem that arises with doctor-led pregnancy care rather than midwife-led care. We're very lucky here in the UK to have midwife-led care, meaning there are fewer unnecessary medical interventions.
Catherine, did they induce? congrats on being a grandma!
They did.. I was feeling uneasy about it for sure, but I felt that she gave me my one opportunity to give my opinion, which I did lightly, and any stronger opinions I had I felt were "expired". However, apparently the doctor said she was in the right place for inducement (I think there's a Bishop's score or something like that). All went smoothly, and the baby was 8 lbs 6 oz, so he certainly seems big enough.
She definitely has control freak tendencies, so that was part of it. There is also a very strange twist to her desire to have him born on the 21st having to do with the historic significance of that date for her. 'Nuf said for now.
Thanks!
rodeosweetheart
3-23-14, 7:32pm
There is also a very strange twist to her desire to have him born on the 21st having to do with the historic significance of that date for her. 'Nuf said for now.
Thanks!
Well, it's my birthday and Bach's birthday, so the baby is in good company!
Well, it's my birthday and Bach's birthday, so the baby is in good company!
Happy belated birthday, rodeosweetheart!!
Gardenarian
3-24-14, 2:25pm
There is nothing like a baby to let you go of trying to control everything. You just can't.
(I'm a control freak in certain areas.)
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