View Full Version : why does this matter? holiday greetings
So it is earlier every year, I haven't even had my favorite holiday yet (Halloween) and already there are comments and posts about how we 'can't' say Merry Christmas anymore. These are dear friends and family on facebook, I get a lot out of keeping in touch this way so I am not bothered enough to cut this communication out. However I already have 2 people who posted that the US is a CHRISTIAN country and it is horrible that we cannot say Merry Christmas.
Here is what I don't understand, they are reasonably close to me and therefore know I am Buddhist. They also know many people who are not Christian. I grew up without everyone I knew being Christian and I am 47. I have never lived in a 100% Christian community, and they have not either. So do they just blank out the people who are up front not Christian? When I was Christian as a child I loved saying Happy Holidays because it included my friends.
Also I don't get this 'not allowed' deal. I don't take any offense if someone wishes me Merry Christmas, but I am going to say Happy Holidays. I also don't refer to the time off school in December as Christmas Break, but rather winter break. However people are 'allowed' to speak, unless it is a work rule and then you have your perrsonal life you can speak as you wish. Could it be that they are just uncomfortable with not being in a homongenous group? I dont' understand but I would like to.
Now I just don't feel good about posting anything on facebook on this topic. I pretty much use it to see pictures of relative's kids and keep in touch with my Buddhist groups that communicate there. It seems inflammatory to post even something very positive about the reason I feel good about saying happy holidays. However if anyone has a beautiful and respectful link or wording to say something on this topic I would love to hear it.
My wife's elementary school doesn't have Christmas Break, it must be referred to as Winter Break, which just happens to be the same week they used to have Christmas Break. That's the sort of thing that drives people nuts. Political correctness isn't inclusive, it excludes most people's most cherished traditions.
Wish enjoyment of the spirit of the holidays. Just a quick question, would you celebrate the season as part of the Bhuddist belief system?
rosarugosa
9-26-14, 8:57pm
I always thought this was a nonsensical thing dreamed up to foster divisiveness. I'm an atheist, so I'll tend to wish people a good holiday, but if someone wishes me a Merry Christmas, I will wish him/her the same. I think I'm perhaps just more likely as a non-Christian to realize that those around me are not all Christians (although most are), so I go more generic to be more inclusive. There are other major holidays celebrated in December. Who even cares? Good wishes are good wishes.
"Can't say"....
Odd concept indeed, if you are acting as a private person in your normal daily life, and not as a representative of some organization.
What are they going to do, arrest you? For what?
"Can't say"....
Odd concept indeed, if you are acting as a private person in your normal daily life, and not as a representative of some organization.
What are they going to do, arrest you? For what?
+1 - people seem more upset of their inability to force others to say what they want to hear. They of course can say whatever they want.
For me, it has more to do with the intent of the wisher. If someone is sincerely wishing me well within the parameters of their belief system, I will it accept it gladly and graciously regardless of how they label it. If they are saying "Merry Christmas" merely because they think it will put some people off, or just in defiance to whoever is supposedly banning them from saying it, I'm not going to respond as positively to that. If they aren't happy that I don't respond as they would like me to respond (I'm not likely to say Merry Christmas), well that goes back to the beginning of what I said.
"Can't say"....
Odd concept indeed, if you are acting as a private person in your normal daily life, and not as a representative of some organization.
What are they going to do, arrest you? For what?
That is it, other than some policies you may have to follow at work (I have had telephone and customer scripts in many jobs) no one is going to have any say over what you choose to say. We do have freedom of speech, however not everyone necessarily likes what you say of course.
My wife's elementary school doesn't have Christmas Break, it must be referred to as Winter Break, which just happens to be the same week they used to have Christmas Break. That's the sort of thing that drives people nuts. Political correctness isn't inclusive, it excludes most people's most cherished traditions.
I guess I don't get it. I spent my childhood with best friends who were not Christians and my own adult life raising kids who are not Christians so I am so relieved that I can say winter holidays or happy holidays and not get the stare down or negative comments anymore. I have had some pretty rude encounters when I said happy holidays in the past, I am sure that others have had rude encounters from saying Merry Christmas. I would rather look for a way to have a respectful understanding and conversation based on knowing that this is a sensitive topic for many,
IshbelRobertson
9-27-14, 5:42am
But..... Surely for many of us 'Merry Christmas' holds the same meaning as 'happy New Year' or even 'happy birthday'?
I have Jewish friends who accept and return Merry Christmas wishes, ditto atheists, muslims and agnostics. There is no duty connected to the words. Most sensible folk just acknowledge the celebration, even if they do not hold the same beliefs.
I think people who get aerated about this topic are simply seeking validation of their view!
goldensmom
9-27-14, 6:29am
Wish me happy anything, anytime. I don't think wishing someone a happy/merry whatever has malicious intent behind it nor would it bother me if it did. I assume that the statement is meant for good. It's simply something someone says. I do wonder when people wish me a Happy Memorial Day, a day on which those who died in active military service are remembered, hard for me to think of as a happy thing but I just wish them the same in return.
Many people recall when the country was far less inclusive, unfortunately, and are unintentionally basing their nostalgia on that. When I was growing up everything was Merry Christmas, Christmas break, Christmas this, Christmas that. But this was in a Connecticut suburb where there were maybe two non-Christians in my public high school class of 300.
When I moved to NJ, I experienced the whole Happy Holidays things, but that made sense. If you add up all non-Christians (Jews, Hindus, Muslims, Buddhists, B'hai and other) in my town and lumped them together, Christians are DEFINITELY the minority. So if I took offense because I "couldn't" wish people Merry Christmas, I'd very self-absorbed, and should move somewhere else, like the Bible Belt. My husband definitely is not an "I can't" type of person, so he wishes Merry Christmas to everyone he sees. No one has shunned him (or, to bae's point, arrested him) yet.
I think people pining the fact that not everyone is on the "Merry Christmas" train are people bemoaning "the good old days."
Making a big deal out the holiday thing gets really tedious. And OTOH, if our citizenship in the US is 80% Christian (which it is), national efforts to squelch displays that are meaningful to the vast majority might be encroaching on the liberties of the majority (depending on the situation)--so that's where I might agree with Alan. But overall, I wish people could just chill out about it and be respectful all around.
That makes sense. I am of course aware of a Christian majority but since I haven't been in that group for a long time I tend to know the non-Christians. None of us have talked about any problems with being wished merry or happy anything, mostly we get frustrated with the same things as many others. The commercialization, the early focus on Christmas that starts earlier each year, etc. But the only displays I have heard have been holiday displays that include something like a peace sign in a neighborhood with a covenant.
I just wish there was a way to engage in the conversation, to help us all test things out (such as keeping track if you have ever been shunned for saying Merry Christmas rather than assuming all the happy holidayers are out to get you), and not put negative feelings in a small part of the holidays.
I think my response would be "I don't really care whether you say merry Christmas or not. But please wait until the appropriate time of the year. September is the time of year to focus on pumpkin spice latte, not Christmas."
iris lilies
9-27-14, 10:31am
I think my response would be "I don't really care whether you say merry Christmas or not. But please wait until the appropriate time of the year. September is the time of year to focus on pumpkin spice latte, not Christmas."
hahaha yep! I would like Christmas celebrations to last about 2 days. Maybe I could put up with a week. But no longer than that.
ToomuchStuff
9-27-14, 10:44am
I just wish there was a way to engage in the conversation, to help us all test things out (such as keeping track if you have ever been shunned for saying Merry Christmas rather than assuming all the happy holidayers are out to get you), and not put negative feelings in a small part of the holidays.
Some people will take offense to anything one says. Sometimes it is by choice, and other times, there may be some reason/memory/etc. that the talker doesn't know about. I don't think too many people get upset with the happy or merry part, just the Christmas part. And while there are lot's of jobs/area's/groups that can't say Merry Christmas, they can be responded to that way. (part of the political correctness thing) School's, government jobs, etc. are ones that I know of.
I personally am not a fan of the pagen holiday, that was usurped by Christians and then usurped by commercialism. While I have no problems saying Yule tidings to some women I know (who gets that reference), or shocking one friend who says Merry Christmas, by responding Happy Hanukkah (he's Jewish and never had anyone do that before), I just kind of wish the whole thing would go away. Too many bad memories, (example, couple Christmas's in hospital with those I didn't know if they would make it) let alone dealing with the public, with their fake holiday cheer, while they are slugging it out trying to by the hot thing this year. I definitely more miserable that time of year.
We don't have TV - get what we want from internet. And I avoid shopping as much as possible. So I rarely notice anything about holidays except outdoor decorative lights which are nice. and I love it that way.
ApatheticNoMore
9-27-14, 11:41am
We don't have TV - get what we want from internet. And I avoid shopping as much as possible. So I rarely notice anything about holidays except outdoor decorative lights which are nice. and I love it that way.
The xmas music, at stores, when buying groceries, when you just want to get your stupid food for the week? Yes earplugs are a good idea if one remembers. I have gone to extremes like stocking up on all non-perishable food/household supplies so I didn't have to buy ANY during the holidays and could get in and out of stores faster, but if one wants some fresh food (and I do!) it's hard to avoid entirely. And if they keep starting it sooner and sooner, I thought I'd avoid this by stocking up on the non-perishables/household stuff the weekend before the black friday weekend, but it wasn't enough! 1st of Nov may be more realistic, if even if is soon enough!
Also I walk through a mall on the way to work (yep a mall, because it's THE direct route) so no it's not going to be easy to avoid holiday music and displays etc. at a mall (it is a particularly ridiculous mall filled with the most both useless AND expensive stuff imaginable so it produces no temptation, a more normal mall, well at least there might be something to buy at a more normal mall). Now I may well go well out of my way to try to avoid this but it's not that easy to avoid the holidays, just not owing a t.v. is not enough.
IshbelRobertson
9-27-14, 11:56am
In Scotland, Hogmanay is our biggest holiday, and when I was young, Christmas was primarily a religious holiday and also for children. I can recall when Christmas Day was a working day if it fell Mon-Fri!
Oh and we don't wish people 'happy hogmanay' , although some of my foreign friends say it... We are superstitious and usually just say 'happy new year (when it comes')' in case the recipient of the good wishes should not make it to Ne'er Day. :)
Miss Cellane
9-27-14, 12:52pm
You can say anything you like on your own time.
Certain employers have guidelines for inclusiveness that do not allow for specific holidays to be mentioned. I don't see a problem with that. Employers dictate the clothes you wear to work, how you can act and what you can say at work--no foul language, no hate speech, nothing that could be considered sexual harassment--, when you eat your meals, how much you get paid. Saying "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas" is way down on my list of things I'd like my employer to change.
Retailers don't want to offend customers who don't celebrate Christmas. Except for Jehovah's Witnesses, pretty much everyone in the US celebrates Thanksgiving and New Years (or at least isn't opposed to them), and those are the two holidays that pretty much bookend the holiday season. So it is a safe thing to wish people.
Government organizations, again, don't want to offend the people they are there to serve. So a more generic greeting is appropriate.
The alternative would be to not mention the holidays at all.
On your own time, you can wish anyone anything you want to. I don't see why people complain about "I can't say 'Merry Christmas,'" when they can say it as much as they want to, just not at work.
hahaha yep! I would like Christmas celebrations to last about 2 days. Maybe I could put up with a week. But no longer than that.
12 days of Christmas?
iris lilies
9-27-14, 2:04pm
12 days of Christmas?
For you, Tradd, I would put up with 12 days if you would promise me that it's OVER on Dec. 26.
Make that weird twilight week between Christmas and New Years' Eve where nothing happens a thing of the past. No work gets done that week and it's just one more extension of Christmas hell.
Ah ... Yes. I delegate most grocery shopping to my husband. I live in a vacuum. :)
I think people who get aerated about this topic are simply seeking validation of their view!
It may be more self defense than insisting on validation of ones own view.
The aural assault of xmas music for 2+ months/year for our entire lives. The same annoying songs. Would anyone put up with Achy Breaky Heart & "Never gonna give you up" everywhere they went for 2 months of every year?
The irritable crowds one must fight for the most mundane non-gifts items like food and tampons!
Why would any Christian insist on saying Merry Christmas to someone who wouldn't appreciate it anyway?
It says, Love thy neighbor, not, Irritate your neighbors.
It's sad to see all the stress on peoples faces in their effort to have a "Merry" Christmas.
That's not a "Merry" Christmas for anyone.
So please don't spread that stress to me!
IshbelRobertson
9-27-14, 6:24pm
Thankfully, our 'holiday' season doesn't start until a couple of weeks before Christmas. In my family, we don't buy a tree or decorate until the week before Christmas (apart from advent wreaths and candles). Decorations come down on Twelfth night ( 6 Jan).
I know in the US 'the holidays' encompasses Halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year. No wonder many of you become all 'holidayed' out!
ApatheticNoMore
9-27-14, 8:41pm
The aural assault of xmas music for 2+ months/year for our entire lives. The same annoying songs. Would anyone put up with Achy Breaky Heart & "Never gonna give you up" everywhere they went for 2 months of every year? The irritable crowds one must fight for the most mundane non-gifts items like food and tampons!
+1000, and traffic ALWAYS gets worse too. Ok it gets somewhat worse on workdays in fall/winter anyway some kind of school year phenomena that doesn't last into spring, but it's at it's worst near xmas. It's pitch blacky darkness no matter how early you leave work (winter solstice - it can't be helped) and meanwhile everyone is driving about like a maniac in the dark. And yes the crowds at stores etc.. to buy the most basic things. At least stores try to make the non xmas music fairly bland and unobjectionable, they don't always succeed and not with everyone but at least it's not white christmas or jingle bell rock for the 10th thousands time in your life ..... Whatever enjoyment you may have taken in shopping - forget it during those months. It's why I'm already mentally toying with doing a 2 month "shopping fast" for Nov and Dec (no food is not included in the "shopping fast", nor household supplies if my stockpiles aren't sufficient). I may or may not do it, it goes without saying if I did buy any non-basics at that time of year I'd do it online! Even those grocery delivery services start to sound good, for a month or two :)
I know in the US 'the holidays' encompasses Halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year. No wonder many of you become all 'holidayed' out!
The odd thing is we don't actually get almost any time off for them of course. No noone gets a day off for Halloween of course. Now many people do get 2 days for thanksgiving, always a Thursday and a Friday, making a nice 4 day weekend. Christmas is only 1 day off on whatever day it falls (if that's a Wednesday then you work 2 days on both ends for 1 day off midweek). Sure in the UK there's boxing day etc. and additional days in Scotland I guess but in the U.S. the whole schebang is for one day. New Years is the same 1 day off on whatever day it falls. So really we put up with a month of stress inducing madness and get one day off (to rest and recover from the insanity?). So no wonder why many get holidayed out. Yes all the retail people are working those days, I know, I usually do the store boycott on holidays proper because of that (I mean a full boycott - not even buying food). But even if you get your federal holidays off it's still exhausting.
For you, Tradd, I would put up with 12 days if you would promise me that it's OVER on Dec. 26.
Make that weird twilight week between Christmas and New Years' Eve where nothing happens a thing of the past. No work gets done that week and it's just one more extension of Christmas hell.
Do we have to get the gifts from the song? I'd really rather have an iPhone 6 plus instead of a partridge in a pear tree. Although maybe some lords a leaping might be an interesting gift depending on what they are wearing...
Do we have to get the gifts from the song? I'd really rather have an iPhone 6 plus instead of a partridge in a pear tree. Although maybe some lords a leaping might be an interesting gift depending on what they are wearing...
:D
12 days of Christmas?
Just 12 days of Christmas.....I like that, I could handle that. Maybe...
I'm up with insomnia and now I have that damn song stuck in my head. ;)
early morning
9-28-14, 11:02am
Is it permitted for a simple-living member to ENJOY the holidays? ;) Personally, I love them. I like the lights, the bustle, the music. I don't do the parts I don't like - almost no shopping, and we exchange few gifts. I haven't been to a mall in years and don't enjoy them at any time. But we always try to go to a few holiday-themed events - concerts, plays, outdoor displays- religious and secular. I am not Christian or anything else that has a label, and I gladly wish people Happy Holidays, or Merry Christmas if I know they prefer it. I love to learn about other people's - and other culture's- holiday traditions. I do understand that if you don't like the holiday season, it must be very difficult, because it IS everywhere. To me, though, the holidays (and we treat them separately at our home) are a special treat, a time apart. They remind me that there is more to my life than just the mundane, daily grind, and that there is a "specialness", for want of a better word, in taking time out for a day, or even a few weeks, to feel something else, and be someone slightly different, slightly better in some way, than I was before.
I say Merry Christmas and happy New Year to everyone. I only know Christians and Jewish.
catherine
9-28-14, 12:08pm
Is it permitted for a simple-living member to ENJOY the holidays? ;) Personally, I love them. I like the lights, the bustle, the music. I don't do the parts I don't like - almost no shopping, and we exchange few gifts. I haven't been to a mall in years and don't enjoy them at any time. But we always try to go to a few holiday-themed events - concerts, plays, outdoor displays- religious and secular. I am not Christian or anything else that has a label, and I gladly wish people Happy Holidays, or Merry Christmas if I know they prefer it. I love to learn about other people's - and other culture's- holiday traditions. I do understand that if you don't like the holiday season, it must be very difficult, because it IS everywhere. To me, though, the holidays (and we treat them separately at our home) are a special treat, a time apart. They remind me that there is more to my life than just the mundane, daily grind, and that there is a "specialness", for want of a better word, in taking time out for a day, or even a few weeks, to feel something else, and be someone slightly different, slightly better in some way, than I was before.
Nice post, early morning.
iris lilies
9-28-14, 12:48pm
Is it permitted for a simple-living member to ENJOY the holidays? ;) Personally, I love them. I like the lights, the bustle, the music. I don't do the parts I don't like - almost no shopping, and we exchange few gifts. I haven't been to a mall in years and don't enjoy them at any time. But we always try to go to a few holiday-themed events - concerts, plays, outdoor displays- religious and secular.... .
I agree, and I really am not that curmudgeonly about holiday season EXCEPT that work slows to a crawl because from Nov 24 through Jan 3 too many people are gone from work and projects to which they contribute can't be completed.
But I do like a holiday event if it's fresh to me and we usually gone on a holiday house tour and a concert. I loathe doing the same thing year after year, and this year I'm trying to figure out out to get out of one event that has become all too predictable.
I actually really like the holidays more the last couple years. I had some where it was just rough, I didn't have much fun. Now 2 out of 3 of my kids are on their own and I think that it is so special now because we don't see each other as often. The gifts are actually surprises since they are not snooping in the house too. It helps a lot to not work retail or do much shopping to enjoy things more.
But..... Surely for many of us 'Merry Christmas' holds the same meaning as 'happy New Year' or even 'happy birthday'?
I have Jewish friends who accept and return Merry Christmas wishes, ditto atheists, muslims and agnostics. There is no duty connected to the words. Most sensible folk just acknowledge the celebration, even if they do not hold the same beliefs.
I think people who get aerated about this topic are simply seeking validation of their view!
I agreed with this comment then was interested to notice it was from a fellow UK resident. We have Hindu friends who even send us a Christmas card, and we have been to one of their Diwali parties.
I work in an international school where few of the students (and not many of the teachers) are Christian but it never occurs to me to worry about saying 'Christmas holidays' or 'the exams are after Christmas'. I treat Christmas as a cultural calendar event rather than anything religious. I am not a Christian myself but do wish people a happy Christmas.
First of all, as bae said, no one is going to arrest you for saying Merry Christmas. And really, do you have first hand experience with someone being mad at you for saying it? Or are your 'tales of angst' coming straight from Fox and Rush? Cause I'm thinking the latter. Whoever said this meme is used to simply divide is spot on. The perpetually persecuted christian right has co-opted this innocuous greeting to use it for their political purposes. They really must stay up late nights thinking up these ridiculous wedges to to weave into their crown of thorns. The only war on Christmas being waged is by the christian right (or conservatives who think they can pin something on the liberals) against anyone who will sit for 5 minutes to listen to their rant.
Really, how is calling it Winter break excluding ANYONE? That pretty much includes every kid who will be off from school which is ALL OF THEM. As someone else said, it really isn't about your ability to say Merry Christmas but rather your inability to force everyone else to say it. Same with prayer in school, but that's another discussion.
Now, I do like Christmas. The music in the stores doesn't really bother me as I ignore it as much as I ignore whatever music they play the rest of the year. (which reminds me of the time my son reprogrammed my phone to play the Japanese national anthem and I was just walking through the store humming the tune not realizing it was my phone ringing)
To me, Christmas, and all the holidays, means family. Family gets so far flung and busy throughout the year that this gives us a reason to slow down a bit and come together. Sure we don't really need an excuse, but it's a good one I think. Also, in our travels we didn't just buy every trinket souvenir we came across. No Eiffel tower paper weights for us. Instead, I would get small Christmas decorations, or other small things to hang on the tree from each country as a memory. Each would usually have meaning to our visit, little chalet from the Alps, etc... That way, I wasn't stuck with a ton of crap to move and dust and clutter my home with. We pull out these little reminders of wonderful times once a year, talk about them and our memories for a short season, then pack them away in just a couple of boxes in the attic. Done and done!
As our kids move on with their lives, they can each take some of these for their memories and trees. (although I will have to buy a second pickle cause I only have one!)
Really, how is calling it Winter break excluding ANYONE?
It doesn't, and neither does calling it Christmas break, but for some reason one of those choices is not permitted within most public schools. I wonder why?
Because it's the universally inclusive option. Except maybe in the Southern Hemisphere...
Why is it considered inclusive to exclude Christmas from a holiday greeting or work respite? Are those who do not celebrate Christmas so easily offended? Can I not wish your neighbor a happy birthday because it's not your birthday?
Winter Break is considered inclusive because it is talking about a school schedule at a specific time of year. It in no way excludes how one chooses to use that break from school.
I am offended by months of Christmas of music each year, the irritable crowds, the stress I see my friends go through every December all in the name of Christmas. I don't recall seeing any of that in Bible. This is just madness and wishing me a Merry Christmas is like trying to spread this stress germ to me also. I really, really don't want it.
Wishing my neighbor happy birthday is between you and my neighbor.
I am offended by months of Christmas of music each year, the irritable crowds, the stress I see my friends go through every December all in the name of Christmas. I don't recall seeing any of that in Bible. This is just madness and wishing me a Merry Christmas is like trying to spread this stress germ to me also. I really, really don't want it.
.
I think that's the root of much of this controversy. If someone doesn't like something they don't want anyone else reminding them of it. Since everyone seemingly has the right to never be offended, it's considered bad form to wish happiness and good cheer to those who don't appreciate it. In the absence of tolerance, we should probably just banish the tradition of well wishing, at least during the Christmas season.
Christmas isn't mentioned in the Bible because it's a pagan holiday that was co-opted by Christians long after the Bible was written. Many experts think the historical Jesus was born in the Spring--lambing season.
I don't care how anyone greets me, but due to the large number of celebrations and holidays--Hannukah, St. Lucia's day, Kwanzaa, Christmas, Yule, New Year, Bodhi day, Hogmanay, Festivus*...I think Happy Holidays comes closest to covering them all.
*http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_multinational_festivals_and_holidays
ToomuchStuff
9-29-14, 11:53pm
To me, Christmas, and all the holidays, means family. Sounds awful.:laff:
Thanks for the laugh, reminded me of this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juYg901PmFo
I think that's the root of much of this controversy. If someone doesn't like something they don't want anyone else reminding them of it. Since everyone seemingly has the right to never be offended, it's considered bad form to wish happiness and good cheer to those who don't appreciate it. In the absence of tolerance, we should probably just banish the tradition of well wishing, at least during the Christmas season.
You are welcome to wish me happiness and good cheer or well wishes :)
Those mean different things than Merry Christmas.
Christmas isn't mentioned in the Bible because it's a pagan holiday that was co-opted by Christians long after the Bible was written. Many experts think the historical Jesus was born in the Spring--lambing season. [/URL]
Sorry my poor writing misled you, I didn't mean the mention of Christmas specifically but the general excess (overspending) and stressful (over scheduling) things people do in December to have that "perfect Christmas"
Sorry my poor writing misled you, I didn't mean the mention of Christmas specifically but the general excess (overspending) and stressful (over scheduling) things people do in December to have that "perfect Christmas"
I would have to say that if there really were a War on Christmas, it would be what you mention above Dhiana.
And now the bast*#ds have encroached on Thanksgiving to get that materialistic hogwash started sooner.
Is it really that Communist to have 1 day where the crappy stores are closed?
Christmas is about a child born in a barn to an unmarried mother that had to wrap her baby in rags.
That's how God chose to become one of us - in the most humble of circumstances.
You want to believe that, fine. You don't want to believe that, fine.
It's still a beautiful story and has tremendous meaning to me.
I love, love, love Christmas.
We've started a family tradition where we put our tree up the day after Thanksgiving to get the most bang for the longest time.
I have ornaments that have been in my family for years - each one has a meaning.
I set my radio to the Christmas stations and go ape for 5 weeks. I'm that annoying person in the grocery smiling along to the infernal music.
We've even ventured into Elf on the Shelf - my kids are the perfect age & it's the best $30 I've ever spent.. we had so much fun with that thing last year.
I make family recipe cookies and dishes from recipes scribbled in dear relatives' script now deceased.
I even loosen the budgetary reigns and shop on the off times and let myself enjoy a little Crap Viewing.
We go for walks to see the lights.
Singing Carols at Church or in the Neighborhood - Count me in.
Going to Handel's Messiah - a must.
Collecting money or gifts for those that will have nothing --- the whole point!
All of that stuff above doesn't really cost a lot. And it brings me such Joy.
Sometimes I say Merry Christmas, sometimes I say Happy Holidays. Whatever seems the most apt for the scenario I'm in.
If I know someone is Jewish and practicing their religion, I say, 'Have a wonderful Hanukkah'.
This is a manufactured problem to sell Ad Time on Fox News and Far Right Conservative Radio Stations.
Period. End of Story.
I love a beautiful Nativity Set as much as the next Christian, but if it infringes on the Separation of Church & State, sell the town nativity to the church next to town hall for $1 and display it there.
If someone wished me a Merry Christmas and I didn't want to hear it, I could always respond, "May you experience the Peace of Christmas"
I still can't say I totally understand, but I am working with it. I don't hear people in real life every tell me they are treated badly about saying Merry Christmas and the only 'rules' tend to be with working communication. There is just this idea about it not being okay. And culturally it has shifted so maybe that is true. For as many buttons as it pushes for the Merry Christmas crowd it does push buttons on the other side as well.
Overall it doesn't affect my life except I remembered why I brought this up, people in my family who I will see at the holidays posted this. People who know that I am not Christian. People I exchange gifts with and listen to prayers at common meals with and am a confidant of. This is not some random stranger who brought it up. It makes me wonder, and at the core we want and need to belong to our groups, families and tribes. There are a few other things that make me feel like I need to step back and not be so close because I am the 'other' in ways to them. On a total side note I went to a funeral with this branch of the family and the funeral sermon included stuff that basically said I was going to hell as a heathen. I thought it was simply a mistake and the priest used the funeral for his own platform. But maybe not. Maybe the person who confides in me really does believe this way. I have a little sadness here,
I have a little sadness here,
I'm sorry for this.
My diatribe was the whole general War on Christmas theme, not about these personal matters.
Oh no worries, I am fine on this and just remembered why it prompted me to post about it since I pretty much am fine with the varying holiday stuff. I have a lot of the same joys around holidays as you do. Some of my fondest memories are also spending time with my best friend's family who are Jewish. I got all the good stuff. So for me saying Happy Holidays is really about honoring that for almost my entire life I have been celebrating multiple holidays with people I care for. I think that is the same spirit that other people have when they give greetings.
And I didn't mean to bring the conversation down into the dumps.
...
Sometimes I say Merry Christmas, sometimes I say Happy Holidays. Whatever seems the most apt for the scenario I'm in.
If I know someone is Jewish and practicing their religion, I say, 'Have a wonderful Hanukkah'.
This is a manufactured problem to sell Ad Time on Fox News and Far Right Conservative Radio Stations.
Period. End of Story.
I couldn't agree more. There's enough angst around the holidays without inserting politics into the mix.
ToomuchStuff
9-30-14, 12:57pm
There are a few other things that make me feel like I need to step back and not be so close because I am the 'other' in ways to them. On a total side note I went to a funeral with this branch of the family and the funeral sermon included stuff that basically said I was going to hell as a heathen. I thought it was simply a mistake and the priest used the funeral for his own platform. But maybe not. Maybe the person who confides in me really does believe this way. I have a little sadness here,
Sounds all to familiar.
So it is earlier every year, I haven't even had my favorite holiday yet (Halloween) and already there are comments and posts about how we 'can't' say Merry Christmas anymore. These are dear friends and family on facebook, I get a lot out of keeping in touch this way so I am not bothered enough to cut this communication out. However I already have 2 people who posted that the US is a CHRISTIAN country and it is horrible that we cannot say Merry Christmas.
Here is what I don't understand, they are reasonably close to me and therefore know I am Buddhist. They also know many people who are not Christian. I grew up without everyone I knew being Christian and I am 47. I have never lived in a 100% Christian community, and they have not either. So do they just blank out the people who are up front not Christian? When I was Christian as a child I loved saying Happy Holidays because it included my friends.
Also I don't get this 'not allowed' deal. I don't take any offense if someone wishes me Merry Christmas, but I am going to say Happy Holidays. I also don't refer to the time off school in December as Christmas Break, but rather winter break. However people are 'allowed' to speak, unless it is a work rule and then you have your perrsonal life you can speak as you wish. Could it be that they are just uncomfortable with not being in a homongenous group? I dont' understand but I would like to.
Now I just don't feel good about posting anything on facebook on this topic. I pretty much use it to see pictures of relative's kids and keep in touch with my Buddhist groups that communicate there. It seems inflammatory to post even something very positive about the reason I feel good about saying happy holidays. However if anyone has a beautiful and respectful link or wording to say something on this topic I would love to hear it.
Somebody said it on Fox News and people have been repeating it ever since as if it were true.
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