I give up

[TxZen]

Something happened this week that I totally fessed up too and even joked around with my SIL about it. She agree what I did was right until she turned into a shark and went after me. I was floored and completely blind sided by her actions. It was something she agreed was the right thing to do until something was said about her by someone who has nothing really to do with our family other than being the "girlfriend' of our BIL who passed away earlier this year and I use that term loosely. The girlfriend has been nothing but trouble. Well, SIL turned a FB post the girlfriend posted...I will wait until y'all roll your eyes....against ME, as if I have said it. Seriously? I give up. We have very little family left that is decent and at this point, even hubby agrees SIL is a spoiled drama queen. We decided to back out gracefully and just do our thing. Beside loving Texas, it's one HUGE reason we live here because we both have major drama on both sides of our families. I give up- I am going to focus on our little family and I am D O N E. I guess if you don't bend over for them, we are not good enough. She is one of those people you can't say something too because you might offend her but she can go off on a tangent. Never understood a person like this. If you constantly hide the truth from them, then they become dramatic at the littlest thing.

So I a give up. Moving on. I have to keep my FB page because it is linked to my business online. Otherwise, I would not have it. But I am done posting other than business related. UGH!!!

[pony mom]

You did the adult, mature thing by backing out gracefully. If members of your family know how this gf really is, the truth will come out somehow.

[ToomuchStuff]

Drop, block or whatever it is called the family from the page. Work and home should NOT be linked on those things.

[Blackdog Lin]

I am sorry for your trouble GreenMama and wish you success on staying off Facebook.

Though it brings me to writing my own little personal Thanksgiving prayer:

Thank you powers-that-be that I am not on Facebook.
Thank you for the lack of drama from not being on Facebook. And that no one can get their feelings hurt by silly words posted thoughtlessly online.
Thank you that none of my family is on Facebook.
Thank you again that none of us interact in any way on Facebook. We are stuck with interacting phone-to-phone, or face-to-face. For this I am eternally grateful.

[jp1]

Facebook can be fine or it can be gawdawful. It totally depends on who you have Facebook friended. The OP's experience sounds awful, but I'd bet in person interaction is not particularly better with her SIL. My Facebook experience is nothing like hers. It's all cat pics and food pics and vacation pics all the time. But I've spent most of my 47 years strenuously avoiding friendships with 'dramamatic' people and my newsfeed reflects the fact that I've been successful at it.

[Aqua Blue]

Facebook can be fine or it can be gawdawful. It totally depends on who you have Facebook friended. The OP's experience sounds awful, but I'd bet in person interaction is not particularly better with her SIL. My Facebook experience is nothing like hers. It's all cat pics and food pics and vacation pics all the time. But I've spent most of my 47 years strenuously avoiding friendships with 'dramamatic' people and my newsfeed reflects the fact that I've been successful at it.

That been my experience too, although my group tends to be me dog people. haha.

[iris lilies]

That been my experience too, although my group tends to be me dog people. haha.

For a while, the only Facebook friends I had were actual dogs. Their people set up their Facebook account and wrote their entries for them.

Now it's just a handful of people on my friend list and all of them either relatives or doggie people and so dog photos are the topic in my feed.

[JaneV2.0]

I solved the problem by not having Facebook friends, so it's cats and news and LC/GF recipes. I avoid drama at all costs (why is it always the "people person" starting this stuff, anyway?)

[ApatheticNoMore]

I solved the problem by not having Facebook friends, so it's cats and news and LC/GF recipes

that also avoids the vacation pics. Who really wants to see the "pics from my 3 weeks in Jamaica" when you've just spent another day slaving away at the office.

[JaneV2.0]

that also avoids the vacation pics. Who really wants to see the "pics from my 3 weeks in Jamaica" when you've just spent another day slaving away at the office.

A variation on the dreaded holiday letter...>:(

[TxZen]

Ya'll have me laughing. She is still angry and so be it. I did separate my work and home page and all that is left on my home page are maybe 20 people who I actually interact with on a daily basis?

My relationship with my SIL has been great for 10 years. We don't chat a lot but never an issue but from what I am understanding from various people, she is very dramatic and turns every little thing into a big thing. They are well known in the town they grew up and still live in to be a bit of a bully type family- lived there their whole life, now have money, think everyone is beneath them and treat people so. She only posts her expensive gifts and makes sure to tell people how much they spent and the brand. I could care less about that stuff because material items mean nothing to me.

So whatever it is, it is. I am enjoying my week with my hubby and son, decorating and doing our Christmas shopping, going to see lights and eating some holiday favorites. I just keep saying a prayer of gratefulness and for being happy every morning and move on.

Here is the great part. I have started writing again and I came up with a great character based on her actions and how she is. Should be interesting no? :)

[iris lilies]

A variation on the dreaded holiday letter...>:(

Now I like those holiday letters, if they are done correctly, because I view them as my executive summary of that family's news. It's a 1 page summary.

I don't have to actually, umm you know, talk to them over the year to get this info. I can learn simple facts like

Steven is teaching in Korea

Michael moved back to the Twin Cities


Two simple sentences and I know everything I want to know, avoiding family gatherings and long emails and phone calls. Pretty sweet, the executive summary.:laff::devil:

[iris lilies]

..
Here is the great part. I have started writing again and I came up with a great character based on her actions and how she is. Should be interesting no? :)

Badnick characters are more interesting than goody goody ones, if you flesh them out and present them in some depth. So yeah, way to go!

[Songbird]

There was a lot of family drama on my FB account with relatives I rarely see, so I had no problem closing mine well over a year ago. Haven't missed it at all! If I were you I would keep your FB account for business only...

[catherine]

Now I like those holiday letters, if they are done correctly, because I view them as my executive summary of that family's news. It's a 1 page summary.

I don't have to actually, umm you know, talk to them over the year to get this info. I can learn simple facts like

Steven is teaching in Korea

Michael moved back to the Twin Cities


Two simple sentences and I know everything I want to know, avoiding family gatherings and long emails and phone calls. Pretty sweet, the executive summary.:laff::devil:

I agree--I enjoy the executive summaries, IL! I never have time to write them. Some years I've written them and reread them and they sounded lame, so I never sent them. I have one friend that I've known since we worked together at NBC in the mid-seventies. She became a published author and a jet-setting coordinator for the Today Show. I opted out of corporate life and started raising a family, and, yes, I admit, it was pretty annoying getting those "well, I just had my first book signing, and i went to Russia to coordinate the Carter/Brezhnev interview. But enough about work, I also got my first solo, singing O Holy Night with the Village Light Opera! Put together Mom and Dad's 25th wedding anniversary, and we all had a wonderful week at the Four Seasons Scottsdale Resort."

Then she'd add a handwritten note, "Hope your year was great!" and I'd think, "Great year! Changed 1237 diapers. I think I qualify for a Guiness Book of World Records for the fewest hours of sleep a person could run a household on! But enough about motherhood. Highlight of the year was that Luke and Laura wedding! What about that! And Phil Donohue has certainly kept my mind active, which is so important given my vocabulary is rivaling that of our 2 year old baby these days. Happy New Year! My resolution is to get to the movie theatre for two hours of solitude."

[Teacher Terry]

Catherine-I hate those holiday letters too!thumbsup!. I really laughed when I read your story above.

[JaneV2.0]

Perfect recap of the Holiday Letter, Catherine. A genuinely informative and entertaining one is a rare and delightful treat.