View Full Version : People approaching you at gas stations
A lot of people I know have been approached in recent months by questionable individuals while at gas stations. I had an incident yesterday. There are some good lessons in it.
Ever since the video came out last year of the Cook County Sheriff's Deputy who shot the guy who was trying to rob him at a gas station, I've been very wary of anyone who approaches me while I'm at the pump. I stand behind my car, so I'm not boxed in between pump and car. My pistol is always with me. On the occasions I purse carry, my purse is on me when I'm gassing up.
Anyway, lately I must be a magnet for people, as I've been approached 4-5 times in the past month while I'm getting gas. Today was the worst of the encounters. I went to visit friends in southern WI yesterday and stopped for gas a bit into IL on my way back. It was about 6pm, still daylight. A pudgy, seedy looking white guy approached me just as I was done. I barked my usual, "No. Get away." Guy kept approaching so I held my left hand out and moved back a couple of steps to go around my car and get in. I can't run anymore due to my bum knee, but I scooted as quick as I could back into my car. Guy was yelling something about only wanting directions. My window was cracked and he was at window before I could pull away. I yelled,"What part of no don't you understand?" and took off.
I always lock my car when I'm filling up. Purse stays in the car, except for the odd occasion when I'm carrying my pistol in my purse. I get out of car with just my keys and credit card in hand. I always use the little level that allows the pump nozzle to stay open, gas flowing, without my hand on it, when getting gas.
The gas station where this happened was not in a bad area. It was a busy location, with a lot of traffic, just off the freeway in a good area. The lesson is this sort of thing can happen anywhere. I'm lucky it didn't escalate. I'm very glad I didn't have to draw my pistol. This is why I always carry and pretty much refuse to go to states where I can't. WI honors the IL CCL, which is how I was able to legally carry where.
Some people have called me paranoid, but I lived for too many years in Chicago, taking public transit and dealing with very aggressive panhandlers. I learned you have to shut them down from the get go. Women alone have to be careful. Guy refusing to take a very clear "no" for an answer and following me around my car? Big red flags waving and warning bells going off.
This is the video of the Cook County deputy's encounter with the bad guys.
http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2014/02/11/police-off-duty-sheriffs-officer-kills-robber-at-gas-station/
iris lilies
8-23-15, 5:50pm
There is never any good reason for someone to approach you at a gas station.
No justification needed, drive on.
No one has ever approached me at a gas station, except the attendant when I lived in Oregon. So I've never felt under siege when I'm gassing up. Without a sidearm. ;)
goldensmom
8-23-15, 9:21pm
I've never been approached at a gas station but it's been years since I've traveled far from home. I think you handled it well. My question would be why would someone approach you at the gas pumps to ask for directions when he doesn't know where you are from and the attendant, who presumably is local, would best answer questions about directions. Ever thought about carrying a taser that could be visible to anyone approaching you?
ApatheticNoMore
8-23-15, 9:30pm
I could imagine a homeless begger person approaching, but that can happen anywhere not just a gas station (and it really seldom happens at gas stations, happens much more at the parking lot of the grocery store). They are mostly utterly harmless at least around here. I've been approached by homeless many times and they are no threat, though I suppose one always could be as they aren't all mentally right.
There was one in my apartment parking lot (it's not enclosed or anything) the other day, that one I was very polite to as I initial thought was a resident and then gave a more serious "no" when it was pretty clear it was a vagrant wanting to talk - probably about money of course. Homeless wandering around in my apartment parking lot I admit is new and slightly alarming. But we do have a massive homeless population lately, and it's not a bad neighborhood at all, but they are literally everywhere in in southern California now, so I guess this is the new normal.
One day I didn't go anywhere but the gas station and the Goodwill, and I lost my wallet which I knew I had originally. I retraced all my steps, notified the Goodwill etc., no luck. It was mailed back to me I think missing some cash but they paid a significant sum to mail it first class (I doubt the person mailing it was the same person who took the cash IOW). Family member says no way customers at the gas station would be nice enough to mail a wallet back, it must have been someone at the Goodwill. I didn't know going to the Goodwill made you nice but ok ...
I've never been approached at a gas station but it's been years since I've traveled far from home. I think you handled it well. My question would be why would someone approach you at the gas pumps to ask for directions when he doesn't know where you are from and the attendant, who presumably is local, would best answer questions about directions. Ever thought about carrying a taser that could be visible to anyone approaching you?
That's what made me think the guy was up to no good, especially when he followed me as I went to get into my car.
I'd have to check into the legalities of tasers in IL. After all, this is the People's Republic of Illinois and concealed carry was forced on the state by a federal appeals court. Even if tasers were legal to carry, not sure on open carry.
Some of our gas stations are well known for being traps where people beg from everyone doing business there. Circle K is well known for not dealing with this and just letting them rule their parking lots. Other companies have strong policies and security on site.
iris lilies
8-23-15, 10:49pm
No one has ever approached me at a gas station, except the attendant when I lived in Oregon. So I've never felt under siege when I'm gassing up. Without a sidearm. ;)
A regular happening here. Usually they are panhandlers. I don't want to know who they are if they aren't panhandlers, they do not intend good things for me.
I simply state firmly "I don't have anything you want tonight, stay back." Works about 90% of the time.
If he persists, I escalate the tone and language of my statements, while making sure I'm not being flanked or surrounded by an accomplice. Works about 90% of the time.
If he breaks a certain distance and is still intent on closing, I draw my firearm to the Sul close retention position. This seems to always work.
the only weapon i have is my attitude and i have been living in a rough area of town for a few years. i see about 10 homeless people a day on street corners and gas stations and bus stops are also common places to see people who are homeless, functionally homeless, rough around the edges. no one has tried to approach me while i was pumping gas and i also tend to lock, but going in and out of stores i used to get more attempts. i put on this attitude, the same one that i have when i go to a punk show back in the day, and don't make eye contact, stand a little taller and puff myself up a little. i have used this when dealing with adults about ready to brawl as well. basically i am not following social norms around coming across as a 'nice female' with soft body language, eye contact and smiling for everyone. i honestly don't know if it would 100% stop or prevent an attack but i have never been hassled.
goldensmom
8-24-15, 7:12am
This makes me think of a similar situation. Although I've never been approached at a gas station, it make me nervous when there is a walk-up to a drive through ATM. I was by myself in the car at a drive thru ATM waiting behind another car early on day last week and there was a man standing at the side of the driveway. When it was my turn, I watched him, kept my car in drive with foot on brake, looked in my rear view mirror and could not see him. When I left I noticed that he was right behind me at the ATM machine. Apparently he was just waiting to use the machine but it made me a bit nervous.
Another time I was at the ATM when the person in in the car in front of me got out and walked back to my car. It turned out to be a person I knew (small town) and he was telling me that the ATM was not working. Just the two of us, early morning, not light yet. In that case I could have got away if foul play was intended.
Wow, I do a lot of traveling and fueling up at many different types of stations (always during the day) and I honestly have never felt threatened by anyone. Maybe I have my head in the sand or don't have my guard up or whatever but I hate to think of living that way, always being on the defensive...however, my gut is the first thing that tells me something doesn't feel right, literally. It clenches up as I get that rush of adrenaline that tells me something is not right. And I can count maybe on one hand the times when that's happened.
Before I go on my epic road trips, I do always wonder about my personal safety and what I would do if I was attacked or kidnapped. I meant to get some pepper spray before the last trip but forgot, and have idly thought in the past about learning how to use a fire arm and then carrying one but have never seriously gotten around to doing it. In a weird way, I actually feel safer as I get older because who would want to mess with an older, graying lady? I carry myself as someone strong and capable, and probably have a "don't mess with me" sort of attitude as well. It seems to work so far. And I do pay close attention to my surroundings, stay within sight of groups while hiking, have my cell phone (though service can still be spotty out west), carry my large heavy key chain in my hand, ready to inflict damage if I feel the need.
One thing I do get paranoid about are highway rest stops. One time I was watching this hitchhiker-slasher-serial killer movie and these two ladies picked up a seemingly nice business man who had car trouble and it turned out that he was maniacal pyscho-killer dude and slashed the woman to death in the isolated highway rest stop bathroom...it was so scary! So now I NEVER stop in those rest areas; I pretty much do not even drive after the sun goes down either, when I am on a long road trip.
I do admit though I need to get a more proactive plan of action in case something ever did come up. You just never know...
I have never felt threatened either but grew up in a time when people were more trusting of each other and I haven't quite accepted the fearful way the world seems to be going. Panhandlers occasionally but I tell them the truth - I don't carry cash. The only time I feel a twinge of paranoia is when using public restrooms but I don't really know why.
frugalone
8-24-15, 11:05am
Both my spouse and I have had people approach us at gas stations and ask for money so they can get "back home to New York" or wherever. It hasn't happened in a while, but it's obviously a con because we have heard almost the exact same words from more than one person.
Another thing that has happened is some kid will ask us to go buy cigarettes for him. No way. The last time it happened, the kid asked me "why not?" And I told him I had quit in 1997 and wasn't about to enable somebody else's habit.
catherine
8-24-15, 11:13am
I have never been approached at gas stations, but as Jane alluded to, I'm sure it's because I am usually surrounded by gas station attendants, and they have never harassed me (except for that one time I mentioned in the Wedding Ring thread).
Many Jerseyans complain about not having self-service, but I really like it. I'm lazy, and I hate getting out of the car in the winter. It comes up in the legislature now and then, but gets shot down quickly (probably due to good lobbyists--I think they already use public safety as a rationale for full service, but not sure if they've considered it from the angle of strangers accosting customers).
frugalone
8-24-15, 11:19am
I would really love it if we had attendants. They are far and few between here in Pa.
I don't like pumping my own gas; I think Oregon has it right. We need all the jobs we can get, and it doesn't affect the price of fuel, as far as I can tell. In fact, I need to run some errands and I'm putting it off because I'm overdue for my bi-monthly :~) fillup.
iris lilies
8-24-15, 1:04pm
I liked the scam a few years ago that was for a specific amount, something like $23.17, and they needed it for a car part to get their car, on the side of the road, running. We had several guys hit us up in a row, but they were performing their shtick by our house.
. We live by 3 major highways. I'll bet this was also a popular gas station scam.
We used to get hit up as we were getting off work late at night by scammers who needed money "to get back to Tacoma." Every few weeks.
My guard is up the second I stop anywhere. Never used to be till I did all that traveling for a year and half. I trust very few that would approach me. Sadly it is the word we live in today:(
I would really love it if we had attendants. They are far and few between here in Pa.
I think the last time I saw a full service gas station was in the early 90s in northern Michigan. In the Chicago area, the only folks who are assisted are disabled folks.
Williamsmith
8-25-15, 9:48pm
So you are being approached at the gas pump by criminals. Gasoline anyone?
Well, I've never been approached at a gas station...except by someone who, you know, wanted directions and thought maybe, since I was gassing up there not 5 feet away from them they'd just ask. You know, come to think of it, I might have asked folks for directions at gas stations myself. Thank goodness I'm still alive!
Once there was this lady who approached me cause she couldn't figure out how to use the pump. I should have shot her on sight but silly me, I didn't have my simi-automatic on me at the time.
She WAS totally asking for it though!;):D
There's a lot of panhandling in Tucson. Gas stations are a "good" place for panhandlers because you're a marginally captive audience; if you're pumping gas you can't just keep walking, there's a process to go through before you can leave. You've also got your wallet out, most likely. One of the stations with the best prices right at the edge of town has what amounts to a little tent city on the premises, I've started avoiding it because I don't like the vibe at all.
I have allocated $5 a week to panhandlers - let the universe sort out who deserves what, I say, although I don't give to people who appear to have taken panhandling as their day job. When my $5 is gone, I feel fine about simply saying no.
ApatheticNoMore
8-27-15, 5:23pm
There's a lot of panhandling in Tucson. Gas stations are a "good" place for panhandlers because you're a marginally captive audience; if you're pumping gas you can't just keep walking, there's a process to go through before you can leave. You've also got your wallet out, most likely.
yea but it would seem to me a bad place to panhandle as most people pay by swiping cards, so they may have very little cash on them, probably why the grocery store is a more popular target. I pay cash and get my change, so I am a good panhandling target I suppose. It isn't a very safe place to use a card on the other hand IMO, lots of hacking.
One of the stations with the best prices right at the edge of town has what amounts to a little tent city on the premises, I've started avoiding it because I don't like the vibe at all.
there's mini tent cities now everywhere it seems (under every bridge), but the homeless are as a rule not dangerous. If you told me 10% of the population was homeless I'd almost believe it. Of course I doubt the real figures are that high, but they are visible.
I have allocated $5 a week to panhandlers - let the universe sort out who deserves what, I say
makes sense
There is a reasonable convenience store at that gas station and I think a lot of out of town people do use cash to go in and buy snacks. I don't think the tent city folks are dangerous, they seem to have a happy little community going, people and their dogs sitting on the "lawn" area playing chess and chatting. Hell, if your life is out on the streets, at least have some company. But it is a place where you will definitely be approached and observed by a group of people, not particularly comfortable.
iris lily
8-28-15, 12:11am
What I love (not) is the current method of asking for money.
"Excuse me! excuse me!" they shout at me from 15 feet away.
I look up, wonder what's up, and they start babbling about something or other and I can't understand them.
When this trick first started I would make an accommodating face, expecting them to come closer and to make it clear what they wanted in case they were, you know, like peggy's folks, asking for something reasonable like directions.
But nope, they just wanted money, each and every time. This happens in front of my house, on the sidewalk by work, at the gas station, over at my garden when I'm working there, etc.
So now when anyone shouts "Excuse me! excuse me!" I just ignore the screeching. And I suspect that they don't come closer to me because someone may have once pulled a gun on them for getting too close, and I am grateful for that.
freshstart
8-28-15, 12:52am
that's must be awful
I am just sad that often when I am approached, it is someone who appears to be on the surface nice and making a friendly comment about the day or whatever. Then when I make eye contact, they immediately switch to a request for money. One guy had a whole routine worked out.
Happens often enough that those who are truly friendly or just being nice get lost in the mess.
Edited to say: Forgot to mention that I reported the guy with the routine to store management since he was in a store and approaching customers. Noted they were right on it. It was an older teenager or young man.
Coworker of mine came into the office quite shaken up yesterday. She had been getting gas on her way to work in a Chicago neighborhood when she was accosted by two guys who boxed her in at the pump. Her phone and purse were taken. The only way they didn't get her car keys is that she always puts them in her cleavage. She's the one I mentioned in the pepper spray thread that didn't take any precautions at all. The thugs didn't show a gun although she was told they had one.
Gas stations and convenience store/Walmart parking lots are like water holes on the African savannah.
http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/exposure/content/photo/photo/1948782_at-the-watering-hole_jfxeaqbh63vorhnrwcs4oomcjqoxpy7q62c4u66siw3t6 qwph3oq_855x641.jpg
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