Portrayals of Real Relationship in the Media

[Geila]

Recently, a friend and I were talking about how unrealistic many of the relationships depicted in movies and shows are, and how that skewed view can really screw up a young person - ie, Twilight. Just like Harlequin Romance novels screwed up some of us back in the day! :|(

And I started trying to come up with examples of realistic relationships on the screen, and couldn't come up with many. Of course, realistic is subjective, but it left me wondering.

What strikes you as realistic or representative of genuine relationship? I'm thinking of relationship in the broad sense, not just romantic. This could be in any form of media - books, tv, movies, etc....

The ones that come to my mind are:
King of the Hill - I like how the show depicts everyday life, everyday problems, and relationships. No one is SPECIAL.
Seinfield - I like how the show depicts friendships, and the separation of adult child from parent. The one quibble would be how available everyone is to each other all the time. In real life, people have to work, clean house, etc...
Malcolm in the Middle - I don't have kids, but I imagine that if I did, life would be something like this.
Arrested Development - I found this show hilarious!
Crossing to Safety - I like how Stegner writes about relationships in this book.

One of the interesting things is that many of the shows I like get described as portraying a dysfunctional family - like Malcolm in the Middle. And I'm thinking..."Really?" That seems a lot more normal to me than most of the episodes on Modern Family. This probably says a lot about me. What, I don't know. >8)

How about you? What says "genuine relationship"* to you?

*I confess that perhaps my idea of what I would like a genuine relationship to be, and what it is in real life, might be blurred. I imagine that we confuse "ideal" with "real" more often than we realize. Perhaps that's what I'm really trying to tease out. This time of year always seems to bring up that contradiction.

[Ultralight]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBt3XoWxvOo

Here is one for ya!

[Geila]

Ah... I don't have cable!

Tell me why you like it.

[kib]

Aziz Ansari's "Master of Nothing" seems like skits that capture the essence of how normal people behave toward each other, and what the realistic expectations of 30-somethings, at least in a big city, might be. Perhaps uncomfortably well.

[ApatheticNoMore]

Here is one for ya!

well it's pessimistic, but is that much pessimism actually realistic either, or just as unrealistic as a harlequin romance only in a different way. Although I suppose a Hollywood show about living in L.A. is kinda going to be horrible and unrealistic of course.

[kally]

Roseanne comes to mind.

[rodeosweetheart]

I loved Laura Dern's series Enlightened for the complexity of relationships, and enjoyed Grace and Frankie for the parent-child relationships.

[Chicken lady]

Anyone old enough to remember dharma and Greg? After the pilot aired, half our friends called to tell us we were on tv.

Now, my daughter says I'm Frankie. She refers to our addition as "Frankie's yurt". Except dh isn't frankie's ex.

[JaneV2.0]

Cagney and Lacey might qualify. I enjoyed it, but it tended to descend into bathos.

[awakenedsoul]

How about Everybody Loves Raymond? That mother in law cracked me up.

I really liked the old shows like Mary Tyler Moore, Bob Newhart, and Carol Burnett. All in the Family and The Jeffersons I found funny, too. They showed a lot of the cracks in relationships. I'm dating myself...

Oh, and Frasier. Some of those female characters really made me laugh. The agent, and the woman Frasier dated that would start screaming "Put your brother on the phone!" in a menopausal rage. I thought those were pretty realistic.

[JaneV2.0]

How about Everybody Loves Raymond? That mother in law cracked me up.

I really liked the old shows like Mary Tyler Moore, Bob Newhart, and Carol Burnett. All in the Family and The Jeffersons I found funny, too. They showed a lot of the cracks in relationships. I'm dating myself...

Oh, and Frasier. Some of those female characters really made me laugh. The agent, and the woman Frasier dated that would start screaming "Put your brother on the phone!" in a menopausal rage. I thought those were pretty realistic.

Frasier spoiled me for subsequent comedy. At its peak, no show did farce better. Roz had some pretty good lines, too. Once she was lamenting a blemish that had appeared on her face just in time for some event. Frasier reassured her that no one would notice, you could hardly see it. "Hardly see it from where? The Space Shuttle?"

[TVRodriguez]

Aziz Ansari's "Master of Nothing" seems like skits that capture the essence of how normal people behave toward each other, and what the realistic expectations of 30-somethings, at least in a big city, might be. Perhaps uncomfortably well.

I really enjoyed that show ("Master of None," btw). There's plenty of dialogue that I found at least somewhat realistic, especially with the parents.

[kib]

oops, yes, master of none.

[ctg492]

I have not watched TV in years so can't add to which is best now portraying life relationships. However that is exactly my thoughts on all the tidbits of "news" daily on the assorted News sites that are about the People of the moment in the Entertainment World. I wonder how I could possibly feel good about myself if I was 15 or so with all these mostly non everyday real life issue in my face daily.
I loved really loved my Rock Stars of the 70s, I read everything I could get my hands on at the time, but it was not there daily or by the minute updates as today. So it was easier to separate from really life. I do not think it is comparable to today.

[margene]

I think king of queens was an excellent portrayal of real life characters. Loved Malcolm in the Middle. I like Modern Family. It doesn't show everyone in a perfect light or one dimensional but it show a family bond.

'

[Ultralight]

My mom, for all her problems, told me this numerous times when I was a kid:

"You don't need role models. Be your own role model!"

So transposing that here: There are real relationships being portrayed among our real families, real friends, and real neighbors. Why not observe them? haha

[Zoe Girl]

So transposing that here: There are real relationships being portrayed among our real families, real friends, and real neighbors. Why not observe them? haha

I always wanted that special type of mirror they use in police interrogation rooms to watch my family from a safe distance.

[iris lilies]

Romantic relationships on tv after the chase and catch are pretty boring.

But others are interesting. What about Raylan and Boyd? Edwina and Patsy? Tony and Pauly? Will and Grace? All interesting, but hardly role models. :)

[Geila]

I remember being young and watching family shows on tv and seeing that they bore no resemblance to my family life whatsoever. For a young person that can be quite problematic. It creates a sort of cognitive dissonance.

So I'm not looking for role models, but rather a closer version to my own reality. Something that resonates with what my own experience has been of close relationships.

Now, back to the shows... :)

I really liked Frasier, especially the family dynamics. I'd forgotten about that one. It was a great show.

On a different note, has anyone seen Netflix's Bloodline? Talk about intense family dynamics there. Really good show, painfully so.

My goal is to someday have a sense of humor about my own family dysfunction - perhaps that's why I'm drawn to particular shows. They don't avoid the dysfunction but they laugh at it.

[Ultralight]

Married with Children?

[iris lilies]

I remember being young and watching family shows on tv and seeing that they bore no resemblance to my family life whatsoever. For a young person that can be quite problematic. It creates a sort of cognitive dissonance.

So I'm not looking for role models, but rather a closer version to my own reality. Something that resonates with what my own experience has been of close relationships.

Now, back to the shows... :)

I really liked Frasier, especially the family dynamics. I'd forgotten about that one. It was a great show.

On a different note, has anyone seen Netflix's Bloodline? Talk about intense family dynamics there. Really good show, painfully so.

My goal is to someday have a sense of humor about my own family dysfunction - perhaps that's why I'm drawn to particular shows. They don't avoid the dysfunction but they laugh at it.

Bloodline's featured family drinks copious amount of alcohol. That's gotta play into their dysfunction.
Its a good drama with decent script and outstanding performances. The actor who plays the badnick brother is mesmerizing, the way he plays the hurt black sheep as well as the menacing older brother.

The actor who plays the younger brother who owns the boat yard is from St. Louis (my town) and has won a Tony for his Broadway work. I hadn't heard of him until this tv show.

[Geila]

The actor who plays the badnick brother is mesmerizing, the way he plays the hurt black sheep as well as the menacing older brother.
.

Yes. He's amazing, and is definitely my favorite actor on the show.

It would be interesting to know if the alcohol is the source of the dysfunction or merely a coping mechanism for it. Or both, I guess.

[LDAHL]

Married with Children?

Yes. And sometimes Game of Thrones.

[rodeosweetheart]

Iris Lilies brilliantly points out the relationship between Patsy and Eddie. And how about Eddie and Saffie? Nuanced, gritty, subtle, and hilarious. But yeah, Patsy and Eddie--there's a bond like a long-term, extremely strange marriage--watch the looks on Patsy's face when she things Eddie is moving on without her. . .

[awakenedsoul]

The thing about sitcoms is they tend to have a formula. The story has to be told in a short time. Part of that half hour is commercials. My sense is that a lot of the shows now are written by gay men. So, I don't think you're really going to find material you relate to as a couple or a family. I don't mean that as a judgement, I work in theater. It's just something I've observed.

Two and a Half Men made me laugh. It got kind of dark for me, though. I did like that Rose character. I thought the guys were funny, too.

[pony mom]

I always thought The Office reflected real life relationships, especially since many people spend more time with coworkers than family. And so many things that happened were true to office life, like the mad dash for a free pretzel on Free Pretzel day, fighting over petty things, dealing with the weird ones.

[kally]

Frasier spoiled me for subsequent comedy. At its peak, no show did farce better. Roz had some pretty good lines, too. Once she was lamenting a blemish that had appeared on her face just in time for some event. Frasier reassured her that no one would notice, you could hardly see it. "Hardly see it from where? The Space Shuttle?"

my dh and I are re-watching Frasier on Youtube from the very beginning. What great writing. And what a magnificently flawed character he is.

[awakenedsoul]

I loved all the characters. Niles used his eyes so well. He could just stand there and I would be howling at his reactions. I loved Daphne, too. They were all such talented actors.

Boy, television sure was different before reality t.v. entered the picture.

When all of that talent comes together: the writers, director, actors, costumes, set designers, etc...the results are pretty incredible.

[ToomuchStuff]

Don't recognize a lot of these posted. All in the Family, definitely had an effect on me growing up (taught me to see their are multiple sides to an issue, not always right/wrong). But I thought the basis of probably all these shows, involved taking some instance that someone knew about, and them blowing it out of proportion. Traditionally, the best humor has some truth in it, or it is based on.
Then you have the reality type tv, where they pay people to go overboard, and only take the best moments. Or the Jerry Springer type of moments (where a neighbor of mine supposedly made his goal to be on an episode, after actually killing his cousin)
Then you have the portrayals in an interview style, where you wish something didn't happen to someone.
Life is strange enough, I don't need to look to an entertainment tool, known as the boob tube, for parenting/relationship advice.

[JaneV2.0]

Hmmm. I never thought of watching Frasier for relationship advice. I'd probably be Lilith. Must re-watch.

[Zoe Girl]

I always thought The Office reflected real life relationships, especially since many people spend more time with coworkers than family. And so many things that happened were true to office life, like the mad dash for a free pretzel on Free Pretzel day, fighting over petty things, dealing with the weird ones.

Oh yeah, the Michael Scott character often made me laugh or cringe, so much like my ex!

[Ultralight]

Oh yeah, the Michael Scott character often made me laugh or cringe, so much like my ex!

Your ex was a lot like Michael Scott? Oh bless your heart! How did you ever cope with that? haha