my friend sent a job posting

[Zoe Girl]

Not in my area or even state, but where she lives. Hmm, I looked it over. It is a leap up in managing the number of sites and the size of the budget, but I am doing all the basic things they are asking for on a smaller scale. Some of the major aspects are running out of school time programs with the school district's goals in the plan, improvement of programming, budget oversight (including grants), and then being a good collaborator and facilitator. I think some of my strengths are the 'soft' ones, and a higher management job doesn't take the skills of knowing how to run every budget program but rather a vision of how to create a team and quality through that, and a lot of little management skills as well. This would mean a larger influence I could have in areas of quality and equity, and that OST programs that are run well are one of our best opportunities to affect the achievement gap for youth. The pay is not quite double what I make now as well.

So I texted my job coach to see if she has time to talk this over. It is a big deal and I would like to at least apply. Something about keeping that energy out there to move my career along is important. Now I have not even addressed the family issue, my kids are all here. My son and his girlfriend both live with me. However everyone is an adult, they are taking care of themselves, and there are no grandchildren yet. I maybe see my girls once a month, quite less with my oldest and she does not talk on the phone. I have tried family dinner nights, asking them to do things, calling just to chat,. It has been 12 years as a single mom with a child(ren) living with me 24-7. I may just freak out and realize that the contact I do have with them is essential or I may find that long distance is fine and knowing I am capable of a good career and earning a good living is a wonderful shift for me.

Hmmmm, still thinking

[Williamsmith]

Moving to another state is a big life change accompanied by a lot of stress you need to be prepared for. Couple that with a new job environment, new job duties, adjustment to a new community, transition to a new apartment or home. For a single person easier than someone not in a relationship. But with others living with you, an additional stressor.

It sounds like the pay is tempting you. If the pay were similar to what you are getting now, would you consider it. Figure out what the difference is and see if you can justify moving and changing for that difference in pay. Decide what connections you have that you would be sacrificing.

Can you apply and go through the selection process without committing yourself. Leave a back door open. Don't paint yourself in a corner, if you decide to do it, be totally committed without any misgivings.

[rodeosweetheart]

I would definitely apply! Talk to your coach and figure out how to best do that so that you can investigate the opportunity. It may be the universe trying to send you a better job situation, and how rewarding would that be!

[sweetana3]

I would consider it carefully and apply. It is good experience and practice, whether you get the job or not. Do you have the financial ability to move without monetary assiatance? That includes lease issues and such? (I am a really practical person.)

Sounds very interesting. Wish you well whatever you decide.

[rodeosweetheart]

Just one comment about stress and moving out of state. I have done it several times now, a few times as empty nesters, and while it is a big change, I have found that sometimes it has been really de-stressing, mostly due to the positive impact on our finances. I.e., moving somewhere with a lower cost of living or less traffic has genuinely lowered our stress levels. You just have to find the right spot and the right financial mix with housing/job. I have never had the pleasure of moving somewhere for a better job, but that would seem to get rid of some stress right there.

Not that moving itself is not horrible, if that makes sense.

[razz]

Often the job application is helping to make you think about things, explore your strengths, reduce self-imposed limits and consider new possibilities, all of which are helpful. Do it for those reasons alone.

[Zoe Girl]

thank you all for the encouragement, I am INFJ so I am already thinking 10 steps ahead!! I wouldn't be considering it for the same pay, that would not make sense. Plus the job is huge and it would be insulting to do that big of a job at the same payrate. But the challenge and ability to influence large amounts of OST programming is exciting, being able to use my collaboration and facilitation skills in a way that affects a larger organization is an awesome idea. In our group in our department we did some exercises that a staff person brought back from a national conference. When we grouped ourselves into 4 types I was the only one in my group, people who know me joked that it made a lot of sense! So I asked my colleague who brought this back if it was the same at the national conference, that no one was in this category. His response was that there were more people in my grouping there and he thought it was because there were higher level leaders included. My type has to do with big vision and getting everyone on board to create something (weak on the details but willing to delegate and manage that). Right now so much of how my job is evaluated is on details and my big vision projects are okay but not really seen as my work as much as something that happened. (example a summer camp with survey results showing 33% of families changed a behavior based on what their child learned at camp, and none of my staff had experience in these areas so I got them on board with the vision).

People in my family do move for jobs, my parents several times, my aunt and I moved for my ex's job. However this would be the first time someone, single or family, moved for a woman's job. That is very important to me to show my girls. It will likely be an exercise in applying and putting myself out there because it is a job managing many sites and levels of an organization and I am currently managing one site, have managed up to 4. Our programs however are well known and I think recognized nationally so that is a plus.

Whew, talking to job coach this evening.

edited to add, the pay is about $25K more.

[catherine]

I would also put the feelers out--what's the harm? Find out more, go on the interviews and then trust your gut. The money increase is great, but make sure the job itself will be an "upgrade" in challenge and fulfillment, because money alone won't make it worth it, especially when you will be making many sacrifices (i.e. moving farther from family)

[pinkytoe]

However this would be the first time someone, single or family, moved for a woman's job. That is very important to me to show my girls.
I think this is very admirable of you to even consider that aspect. If it were me, I would apply and see how things unfold.

[iris lilies]

Having a fair amount of experience as a woman moving across states for my career :) (I moved 3 times and interviewed even more in states I ultimately did not work in) one practical thing you have to think about is: are you willing to pay expenses to interview there? And then if you get the job, are you willing to pay moving expenses?

I don't know for sure, but my impression is that educational institutions aren't friendly to paying any of these expenses.

Of course you would carefully assess the cost of living in the new place.

Decades ago I made the first cut for a job in the most expensive city in Europe, only I didn't know it was the most expensive city in Europe so I thought the salary was Wow! But it wasn't.This was for Vienna.

[Zoe Girl]

Thank you all, I did think a little about the moving cost. When my ex got a job back in Colorado we had to pay for our own move since it was something he asked for. I would check that out before I made a decision, I have 5 antiques, a bed, a table and basic household things (I would just buy a new couch and give this one to my kids). The cost of living is lower, I know I look at jobs in California and the salaries have to be a lot higher to make anything there worth it!

Today I struggled a bit with thinking about family. I am in general thinking I need to have a meeting/dinner with my kids to just connect and talk to them about considering bigger jobs and possible moves, basically where I am at. I want to get a feel for their perspective, like it is so important that I am down the street even if they don't spend time with me, or if they are okay with me living anywhere as long as we stay in contact and visit.

[Teacher Terry]

When I was job hunting nationally with states they could not pay for flights for job interviews. However, everyone of them was willing to interview & hire by phone for professional positions. One state said that they would want to have the candidate chosen fly out once the choice was narrowed to 1 person to make sure it was a good fit. I would definitely explore the option. I moved across the country when my kids were grown & 1 by 1 they all joined me here.

[Zoe Girl]

Thank you TT, good point. I do much of my work by phone or now Fuze meetings. I would be willing to fly out if I pretty much knew that I had the job, especially with a higher salary. And the kids joining you, that gives me some encouragement as well. When I get to grandbabies I would want to be closer but we are looking at 10 years I would guess.

My job coach had an emergency tonight and that gives me some time to process my day, which was intense. I am more mentally present when we meet on a Saturday.