Facing my fear...

[Ultralight]

In January of 2015 I resolved to learn to dance -- nothing fancy or classy -- just some fun, old school party dances.

I learned mostly from a program called Dancefloor Arsenal, which caters to straight white guys who have never danced. Great program, btw!

Now I know a dozen or so basic, multipurpose steps.

But I have yet to use these steps because dancing in public gives me profound social anxiety.


This weekend though -- tomorrow evening, in fact -- I am going to have to face my fear. Fitting that this is the December -- twelve months into my resolution to learn to dance.

My GF and I are going to a party with a DJ in a rented dance hall.

I think I'd be more at ease in a pit full of vipers! :(

[freshstart]

you can do it! Does your GF know you've been practicing or are you going to surprise her?

[bae]

Dude. That's hard core.

I'd rather run into a burning building than dance in public.

[Ultralight]

you can do it! Does your GF know you've been practicing or are you going to surprise her?

She knows. She has seen me two-step, do the Steve Martin, and the heel-toe and such. But only very briefly...

[Ultralight]

Dude. That's hard core.

I'd rather run into a burning building than dance in public.

I am honestly more scared than I have ever been.

[Zoe Girl]

Dude. That's hard core.

I'd rather run into a burning building than dance in public.

I was a punk kid, I don't dance for your protection.

It sounds like fun!

[rodeosweetheart]

That sounds SO FUN!!

And aren't you a good boyfriend for learning the steps--my DH will not dance, even if you pay him. He says he looks like Gomer Pyle, and he kind of does. . .

But I think you're being a great sport and try to relax and enjoy it--sounds wonderful!

[Teacher Terry]

Just focus on your beautiful GF instead of yourself. Look in her eyes & it may help you to relax. The more you do it the easier it gets:)

[Tammy]

This is what alcohol is for. Two drinks and you'll be good to go. :D

Yes - I remember you don't drink. Just bugging you.

I was raised Mennonite. Drinking dancing earrings and movies were bad. And two piece swimsuits.

So I'm still awkward with dancing. Generally don't even do it. But if social pressure prevails I can slow dance. Just move your feet and smile. :)

[Ultralight]

Just focus on your beautiful GF instead of yourself. Look in her eyes & it may help you to relax. The more you do it the easier it gets:)

My therapist calls it "exposure therapy."

Expose yourself to your fear and you can overcome it (sometimes). haha

[Ultralight]

This is what alcohol is for. Two drinks and you'll be good to go. :D

Yes - I remember you don't drink. Just bugging you.

I was raised Mennonite. Drinking dancing earrings and movies were bad. And two piece swimsuits.

So I'm still awkward with dancing. Generally don't even do it. But if social pressure prevails I can slow dance. Just move your feet and smile. :)

Haha! Thanks for the support!

[SteveinMN]

Slow dancing is far easier. I usually take the initiative to ask DW if she'd like to dance when I hear a slow song coming on. She gets to dance, I dance, and I'm excused from the Electric Slide or Chicken Dance or whatever's coming next. :)

You can do this, UA. People are not going to be watching as much as you might think.

[nswef]

Ul I remember from aerobics that no one really watches you dance. I think it's wonderful you are doing it, taking lessons to do it well, you might even have fun!

[freshstart]

Slow dancing is far easier. I usually take the initiative to ask DW if she'd like to dance when I hear a slow song coming on. She gets to dance, I dance, and I'm excused from the Electric Slide or Chicken Dance or whatever's coming next. :)
.

this is the perfect strategy for 90% of the male population, if they only knew how many points they get for taking the initiative, and get to then slide on the Electric Slide

[Alan]

I've had that same fear of dancing in public my entire adult life. The one thing I learned though is that no-one really cares how bad you are as everyone is mostly watching the good dancers.

My wife convinced me to attend once a week Zumba class with her a few years ago and I spent about 18 months dancing in the back row with all the other old guys. We really sucked, but it was fun and we all made a habit of going out for margaritas afterward. I say go out and dance like no one's watching, you'll enjoy it.

[Ultralight]

The folks at this party come from three dancing cultures...

I will certainly be the odd-man-out. haha

Here is what I learned from mostly:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBbHfdV_fj4


Though I did take a few line dance lessons as well.

[nswef]

I hope you have a great time!

[ToomuchStuff]

Where is this event? Point is, if it was an event like a friends wedding, etc, you would probably be more comfortable, as you knew the others well enough, that you had already done some stupid stuff in front of, and knew you lived through it. If this is a strangers event, then realize both you will probably never see any of them again and ALL of them once had their first dance.
Also not a drinker but I do agree that is what so many people use alcohol for, to loosen up their fears/tension.

Do you have a fear of public speaking? Maybe it isn't the dancing your worried about.

[Gardenarian]

Just smile and remember to move your feet around. Have a great time!

[Ultralight]

Fear faced.

Narrow win for UA. haha

If it was a football game my team would have won 8 to 7 with a two point conversion in the last few seconds of the 4th quarter.


I did the two-step with a couple variations, some stair-stepping, and the heel-toe. These three moves got the job done and I blended in pretty well.


Girlfriend was happy.
:cool:

[Williamsmith]

I'm pretty sure you are technologically savvy enough to have a video of some of your floor prowess.........I'm disappointed.....it's all left up to the imagination.

[Ultralight]

it's all left up to the imagination.

This is probably for the best. haha

[SteveinMN]

Congratulations for having faced and triumphed over your fear!

[Ultralight]

Congratulations for having faced and triumphed over your fear!

Thanks!

[nswef]

Yea for you!!!!!

[kib]

:cool::cool::cool::cool:

[freshstart]

color me impressed!