Zoe Girl
3-28-16, 4:36pm
Whew, well I feel better but still a little sensitive overall. Part of the deal after a talk like this.
Last week we were talking about what days we were working this week because it is Spring Break and we only have to work 2 days. She put her finger up in a way that felt like it was in my face. So that has been bugging me and I wanted to also check in with how it is going this year. Last year part of my end of year review really blindsided me, I misjudged the tone of how my work was being received and I really don't want to be at that place again. We have focused a lot on giving and receiving feedback this year so it felt like something the sups had been asking for.
So my sup did not intend to point in my face or give a negative vibe at all, she even used the s-word (sorry), not sure I have ever heard that before from her in 5+ years. I used that as a launch to just check in about how she felt this year, what was her impression in general. It sounded much more positive, a lot of this comes down to numbers. I am the only site out of 49 that is not always on a wait list for programming. Since my numbers have gone up this year that makes me look a lot better. I shared that I thought I had misjudged last year and a few things that I thought were positives were negative enough to end up on my review as a negative. One thing we talked through a little, I told her I understood better now but I honestly believed I had done everything I needed to in order to have permission and inform my sup what I was doing. What was the worst was I was so proud of the work I had done, and it wasn't ignored or but actually written down as a negative. I still think I did a great job on that project, Some things I had no clue were a problem until I was at the end of the year and had a very negative review. It feels good to have a safe enough work environment this year that I could share that, and I am giving myself credit for doing all my own stuff to get ready to handle this positively.
One thing that was interesting was that this sup said she knew that people left the meetings and talked about them and the meeting. I was able to say very honestly that I don't, I don't consider it part of a good work environment to participate in negative gossip. And then I said I might not have too many friends that way, but it was important for me to share that I go to her with issues instead of chatting with co-workers. (yes this is why I post here more often) I also got my time off in August approved. She did tell me that she would share this with my direct sup which felt good, since I am not feeling like diving into that headfirst. Some of the tiredness of this is feeling the heaviness of having to be the one to address things in such a skilled way. It would be much easier to just b** to a dozen people and make her the bad guy,
Last week we were talking about what days we were working this week because it is Spring Break and we only have to work 2 days. She put her finger up in a way that felt like it was in my face. So that has been bugging me and I wanted to also check in with how it is going this year. Last year part of my end of year review really blindsided me, I misjudged the tone of how my work was being received and I really don't want to be at that place again. We have focused a lot on giving and receiving feedback this year so it felt like something the sups had been asking for.
So my sup did not intend to point in my face or give a negative vibe at all, she even used the s-word (sorry), not sure I have ever heard that before from her in 5+ years. I used that as a launch to just check in about how she felt this year, what was her impression in general. It sounded much more positive, a lot of this comes down to numbers. I am the only site out of 49 that is not always on a wait list for programming. Since my numbers have gone up this year that makes me look a lot better. I shared that I thought I had misjudged last year and a few things that I thought were positives were negative enough to end up on my review as a negative. One thing we talked through a little, I told her I understood better now but I honestly believed I had done everything I needed to in order to have permission and inform my sup what I was doing. What was the worst was I was so proud of the work I had done, and it wasn't ignored or but actually written down as a negative. I still think I did a great job on that project, Some things I had no clue were a problem until I was at the end of the year and had a very negative review. It feels good to have a safe enough work environment this year that I could share that, and I am giving myself credit for doing all my own stuff to get ready to handle this positively.
One thing that was interesting was that this sup said she knew that people left the meetings and talked about them and the meeting. I was able to say very honestly that I don't, I don't consider it part of a good work environment to participate in negative gossip. And then I said I might not have too many friends that way, but it was important for me to share that I go to her with issues instead of chatting with co-workers. (yes this is why I post here more often) I also got my time off in August approved. She did tell me that she would share this with my direct sup which felt good, since I am not feeling like diving into that headfirst. Some of the tiredness of this is feeling the heaviness of having to be the one to address things in such a skilled way. It would be much easier to just b** to a dozen people and make her the bad guy,