meetup fail

[Zoe Girl]

So I started a meetup for mindfulness in education, it has had almost no one except 2 women I met through the training I took. I went the day that there was a snow storm the day before and no one showed up, I waited 30 minutes and then left. I wasn't going to have another one until before school started because it seemed timing was off and I knew I needed to do a lot more promotion. That is not something I have time for right now honestly.

Today it was supposed to be at 1, I had no RSVP's on meetup and the 2 other women were feeling sick. I also got no emails from the teachers I reached out to or the facebook pages I had posted it on. So I didn't go, announced on the meetup site that it was cancelled. I just got a call from the library that one man showed up, D** it. I don't feel too bad because I had no feedback that anyone was coming, so I told the librarian to have the guy message me and I would follow up. I was rather bummed but we were going to do a workshop format and I need to know people are going to be there.

This is not the only time I have tried to host things and had very little to no people show up. I am trying REALLY hard to build community with our sangha and in the mindfulness community but I cannot do this myself. Plus it is crappy to keep putting yourself out there. I get feedback from some people that it is difficult or that I can't really expect things from other people, great, I guess I would just like a nice warm hug in life right now for trying and putting myself out there. I do know of a meditation tonight so I am going and being around some people, and we have our nun visiting at regular Monday meditation tomorrow so it will get better.

[razz]

That is tough and discouraging when it keeps happening. Hope that a fresh idea or approach comes to mind or through a suggestion from another.

[Zoe Girl]

I did get a message from him so I could explain what happened. I also got an email from someone who will be returning to the area in the next month or so. That was encouraging and helped my mood. I know that no one wants to be around a downer, but I do think that people take for granted when I host something that they can not make a commitment to show up or not. It has been a long year getting the meditation group to grow in members so we pretty much always have 4 people, 6 months ago we had some meetings with no one, just the facilitator. So I can't take it personally, but I do need to make changes as it goes.

[ApatheticNoMore]

Is this meetup.com? If so it seems a very narrowcast meetup - you have to be both into mindfulness and in education. No doubt other people like that exists, but I'm not sure it's really how people use meetup.com where people try to find general interest things to do, not so highly specialized.

I think the way to do this is to start a meeting with teachers by advertising whereever that would make sense, but I don't think meetup is really it as it's just the general public, not just teachers (and only those that use meetup - which is probably a less busy section of the public - that is often but not necessarily single, probably not raising kids right now, not completely overwhelmed by work right now etc.). And they are seeing what is going on locally when they have nothing to do basically (and occasionally people become regulars in groups after that). And the teachers could just be tired and not want to do anything work related in their free time.

Or start a meetup group on something more broad. Or if you are really just looking for likeminded people maybe hang out with those women one on one - to discuss plans for mindfulness in education or just to be friends whatever seems to make sense (of course the former - working together on personal projects - often leads to the latter but whatever makes sense).

I certainly wouldn't generalize that you can't expect things from other people (the other women may have really been sick afterall). Now the truth is most people are busy, busyness almost feels like being slammed against a wall sometimes to me (and yea I try to do stuff, make my own food, see people I know, take a class etc. - but it's just so exhausting). So the business and exhaustion of people's lives can make some of them unreliable and flaky for generalized meetup groups (pretty low on most peoples priority lists most of the time frankly). And it's really not cool to be a flake. But I'm not sure that is what is going on here so much as the other stuff I mentioned. The odds are lower for a narrowcast group but one of course never knows for certain if a meetup group will take off until one tries for enough time to draw a conclusion. So you are trying.

[Ultralight]

Meet-up is amazeballs! I use it all the time for so many of my social activities!

[Zoe Girl]

Yeah I think the timing is off for the intended audience, teachers and parents. I was frustrated but also did not have 3 hours. Funny cuz I went to meditation later, that was organized and led by other people and all I had to do was show up.

I think my idea of restarting in August when I start to get people talking about it will really be good. And maybe a free location that is very consistent. The library is cheap but also I couldn't get it on Saturday like previous meetings. I don't like changing anything about it so that people can count on us. I know the other ladies were sick, and I am totally overwhelmed, originally I had not wanted to do one in May due to teacher schedules but I got talked into it. Lesson learned. And really big promotion! That is going to be key. As far as knowing how many people will show, that is always a crap shoot isn't it.

[Ultralight]

Mindfulness seems to still be all the rage.

What I really wish is for people to just meditate. Spend 10 or 12 minutes a day and just meditate. This is the practice.

But what I have noticed -- in my own meditation circles and others I have observed and/or heard about -- is that people really like talking about mindfulness and coming up with great ways to apply it to this or that context or life situation or what-have-you or just learning about all the benefits of mindfulness mediation.

Though few people actually sit down on a frequent and regular basis and do it -- actually meditate mindfully.

[Zoe Girl]

I agree, mindfulness is used as a term in schools and other areas to make a separation from religion. That is important since already some areas are shutting down programs due to parent concerns about religion. One yoga teacher in the schools used the word namaste and that was a big issue. I am cringing because I have actual training and it is very clear that in these settings you stick to certain vocabulary, although I know the teachers from my program are Buddhist from other connections.

A big part of our meetup is a 20 minute sit, and the focus is more on being a mindful teacher than teaching mindfulness. However to get people in and start them sitting we need to offer something they want which is how to work with the kids. I have recommended to all the teachers in my school a specific training program they can do on-line and the requirement is that teachers either take a basic mindfulness course or have an established practice. That makes me feel MUCH better. I have wanted a mindfulness in the morning for teachers program but that is almost impossible to get teachers to come early and not have 20 things to do before the bell rings.

It is my strong belief that it is almost impossible to be mindful in all these activities without the support of regular practice, so we agree there.

[Ultralight]

Don't just do something! Sit there!