View Full Version : When do you let a pet go?
As I mentioned on a different thread my cat likely has cancer in his nose/sinuses and is not likely to live for too much longer. He's an old guy, 15 1/2 years old, so he's had a good life. He seems to be holding steady for now. Sneezes a lot. Doesn't do much other than sleep and get up to eat/drink water/use the litter box. Still loves to be held, purrs relentlessly when I pick him up and hold him. And even lets me use a wet towel to bathe him since he gets covered in snot on a daily basis.
But at what point do I say "enough is enough" and make the appointment to go Dr. Kevorkian on him? I don't want to rush things, but I don't want to force him to be miserable just because I don't want to let him go. He doesn't seem to be in a lot of pain, but he is also not going to get better.
It was so much easier with my last cat. He hid his illness well and then went downhill quickly. No decision had to be made. With this guy it's different. If I let him he may well drag this out for a long time.
3013
iris lilies
11-9-19, 10:46pm
When he stops eating is probably the time. But you can discuss this with your vet.
The eating thing is not 100% indicator but it’s good in many cases. My very first bulldog had cancer and was getting open sores on her body but because she was on steroids she still ate like a fiend. Her skin was going to rot off her bones, So we had to euthanize her when she was bright eyed. That was hard.
I always go by "quality of life" these days, and try not to be selfish about "well, maybe another day."
:-(
pinkytoe
11-10-19, 12:14am
I only know that with my dear old Siamese, Cyrano, I waited too long and it is something I will always feel bad about. I kept thinking he would go on his own but cats hang on and don't show their pain. I think the not eating thing is a good indicator.
When he stops eating is probably the time. But you can discuss this with your vet.
The eating thing is not 100% indicator but it’s good in many cases. My very first bulldog had cancer and was getting open sores on her body but because she was on steroids she still ate like a fiend. Her skin was going to rot off her bones, So we had to euthanize her when she was bright eyed. That was hard.
Ugggh. THe steroids he's doing now have made him eat more. Lots more. He'd dropped 2 pounds, but has since regained most of that, presumably because of the steroids.
I'm leaving tomorrow for a few days in DC for work. I guess I'll re access once I get home.
Teacher Terry
11-10-19, 12:09pm
None of my animals ever quit eating. I keep track of good versus bad days. I also look for pain indicators. We have lost 5 dogs in 2 years. It’s hard and I think it’s actually cruel to wait for a animal to die on it’s own. 4 were old and one was only 3 and died at the animal hospital.
iris lilies
11-10-19, 12:24pm
None of my animals ever quit eating. I keep track of good versus bad days. I also look for pain indicators. We have lost 5 dogs in 2 years. It’s hard and I think it’s actually cruel to wait for a animal to die on it’s own. 4 were old and one was only 3 and died at the animal hospital.
that is true. The no eating thing worked for our last three cats tho.
JP, you are definitely in the zone of time to put your cat down. I believe there is a period that begins with discomfort and ends with pain and death on their own. This is the window for euthanasia and there is no one single right day. But the fact that he is sleeping all of his time away is an indicator of discomfort and not a great life.
On the other hand, I don’t know how he normally is.I have a 17-year-old cat who sleeps her life away. She has always been lazy, fat, and she sleeps all day. She is inactive, incurious, and not very bright, although always affectionate. If she starts losing weight I will know we are in the zone of time to go to kitty heaven.
I am so sorry you are going through this; it's a terrible place to be. I was so lucky that Millie died naturally on her own, with life left in her, if that makes sense. It was in keeping with her incredibly kind nature.
iris lilies
11-10-19, 12:54pm
It was just a year ago that we had one of the best pet deaths ever. Our bulldog had a heart attack right in front of us. She had been trotting around normally, she ate dinner 20 minutes before her heart attack. Then she had a massive heart attack and died. That is the way to go
Millie took a giant stretch, you know the way cats do when they are relaxing, and died mid stretch--we found her that way in the morning.
You know your cat best. When the usual happy behavior changes enough to make you worried, that's when you euthanize. Cats don't "aim to please" like dogs, so IMO it is easier to tell. (Cats all my life).
Teacher Terry
11-10-19, 6:38pm
I have only had 2 cats when I was younger. I have become extremely allergic to them so no more kitties for me. They are much different than dogs.
Went to the vet this morning. She agreed that it is definitely time. She's coming by after the clinic closes to take care of it. They don't know it but he and his brother are spending their last afternoon together.
3023
They are so beautifuy, jp1. My heart is so sad for you. You are doing the right thing.
Teacher Terry
11-15-19, 6:50pm
So very sorry.
Aw, I am so sorry....it's so hard to say goodbye. I feel for you.
Went to the vet this morning. She agreed that it is definitely time. She's coming by after the clinic closes to take care of it. They don't know it but he and his brother are spending their last afternoon together.
3023.
Hugs to you and the brother.
catherine
11-15-19, 7:36pm
So, so sorry, jp.
rosarugosa
11-15-19, 7:40pm
I'm so sorry JP. It's the right thing to do, but it certainly isn't easy. That's great that your vet will come to your home. Those are two beautiful boys.
Sorry that it has come to this stage. Brother is going to need lots of extra cuddling to be able cope without his buddy.
I'm sorry. He will be with his family, and in his home, and that is a wonderful gift you can give him.
I am so sorry. I have a thing for orange cats and their pink toes - mellowest cats around; I had to put mine down many years ago.
So sorry you're going through this.
To make this easier on his brother, could you bring him along? Sometimes knowing where their friend went and what happened to them makes it better for them.
iris lilies
11-15-19, 10:03pm
Awww, jp and bro, so sorry.
Thank you for all your kind words. I’m heartbroken but also glad that he’s no longer suffering. And glad that we have a wonderful vet who made this as least awful as was possible.
Sad Eyed Lady
11-16-19, 10:03am
It is always so hard to say goodbye to those little companions who love us unconditionally, trust and depend on us. May your heart heal with time and your sweet memories stay strong.
SteveinMN
11-16-19, 12:26pm
I'm so sorry, jp1.
happystuff
11-16-19, 5:31pm
I'm so sorry. I have an older yellow cat as well and this thread is making me think of what may come. Condolences.
And today we had to put down Chris's brother Everett. We'd been to the vet just last week and learned that he had high blood pressure and his hyperthyroid was out of control again, so he had multiple problems. He was acting fine yesterday but this morning I got up and found him lying on the floor panting, crying, and clearly in distress. Although the shock and loss are horrible I'm glad he didn't have to suffer long. And I'm glad that we didn't have to agonize over "is it the right time" the way we did with Chris. And despite covid we were able to be there with him to the end. He was truly bonded with SO.
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Awww, I’m so sorry about your kitty. That’s a sweet photo. :(
Teacher Terry
9-9-20, 11:16pm
What a sweet kitty. I am so very sorry.
rosarugosa
9-10-20, 6:18am
Oh no. I'm so sorry, JP.
Heartwrenching...I'm so sorry jp... my sincere sympathies to you and SO. Yes, it's at least good that his pain was short-lived and that you were there with him.
And today we had to put down Chris's brother Everett. We'd been to the vet just last week and learned that he had high blood pressure and his hyperthyroid was out of control again, so he had multiple problems. He was acting fine yesterday but this morning I got up and found him lying on the floor panting, crying, and clearly in distress. Although the shock and loss are horrible I'm glad he didn't have to suffer long. And I'm glad that we didn't have to agonize over "is it the right time" the way we did with Chris. And despite covid we were able to be there with him to the end. He was truly bonded with SO.
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Sorry that your other cat has also passed but what a beautiful photo! I always count my blessings when I have to give up a beloved pet - these wonderful creatures are a cherished part of my life and we shared an experience that is always very precious.
happystuff
9-10-20, 9:36am
I'm so sorry, jp.
I am so sorry about your kitties, Jp1. I still miss my little orange cat, who showed up at about two months on our farm, abandoned probably, and shook for the first three days. From then on, she was confidence incarnate.
iris lilies
9-10-20, 10:28am
Jp, so sorry about your kitty-man.
iris lilies
9-10-20, 11:13am
The head butting picture is so sweet. Cats and their head butts. I miss that.
early morning
9-10-20, 11:34am
Oh, jp, I am so sorry - it's SO hard to lose a fur-baby...
frugal-one
9-10-20, 11:42am
I'm sorry for your loss......
Thank you to everyone for your kind words. It's especially sad that we're in the process of moving so I'm doing stuff like running the food bowls through the dishwasher so they can be packed. I'm sure we'll get some new animals at some point after we're settled in the new place but right now we're both just kind of heart broken. He was such an awesome little dude.
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