The new girl [Archive] - Simple Living Forums

klunick

1-8-20, 4:24am

Hi! I am Kelly. I have always been happy with not having a lot of stuff. Never knew there was a name for it until I came across a YouTube video the other day about minimalism. That is me!!

The last week of my Christmas vacation was spent decluttering my house. I thought it already was until I went looking for stuff to get rid of. I am sure our trash service was cursing me as they were throwing bag after bag after bag onto the truck. I still have a little bit left to purge but I can tell the difference already. Seeing what I have and only having what I need is great!

As far as me, I am a wife and mom to two boys. I work at a Police Department as a civilian employee which is why I am up at this ungodly hour! I went from being a City girl to living in the boonies about 23 years ago and I love it. Suits my "simple life" attitude so much better!!

I am looking forward to getting to know all of you and learning your tricks to living a more simple life. Maybe I can even get my husband and oldest son on board. They like to accumulate stuff!!

Yppej

1-8-20, 6:26am

Welcome. With 23+ years living the simple life I look forward to your contributions.

rosarugosa

1-8-20, 6:36am

Welcome, Kelly. It must be extra challenging to live a simple life with a couple of kids. What part of the country are you in? Glad to have you with us.

klunick

1-8-20, 6:41am

Welcome. With 23+ years living the simple life I look forward to your contributions.

Did not have much of a choice. Husband's company moved us to the country. We were both happy about it though but it did take some adjusting. Lots of wide open spaces. The "nearest" grocery store was so far away, I had to bring a cooler with me so nothing would melt on the way home!

klunick

1-8-20, 6:43am

Welcome, Kelly. It must be extra challenging to live a simple life with a couple of kids. What part of the country are you in? Glad to have you with us.

Kids have grown up living that way so it's not too bad. 19 year old is a clothes/shoes person but it's his money and he can spend it how he wants. I don't touch his room. Youngest is more like me and can survive with less stuff. I live in Southern MD/Solomons Island area.

Teacher Terry

1-8-20, 12:31pm

Welcome Kelly! Yes kids tend to accumulate stuff. I would routinely get rid of things as the youngest outgrew toys and clothes.

bae

1-8-20, 12:43pm

Welcome!

klunick

1-8-20, 1:05pm

Welcome Kelly! Yes kids tend to accumulate stuff. I would routinely get rid of things as the youngest outgrew toys and clothes.

My 19 year old is the shopaholic. He has sooo many clothes and shoes! It is ridiculous. But... he bought them with his own money from his job so I leave it alone. I do encourage him to "donate" clothes/shoes to his younger brother periodically. Only problem is that my youngest (16) is so not into clothes or shoes. He literally wears the same seven outfits each week!

Teacher Terry

1-8-20, 1:08pm

I totally agree once they are adults you can’t touch their stuff unless you are married to them:))

klunick

1-8-20, 1:11pm

I totally agree once they are adults you can’t touch their stuff unless you are married to them:))
Husband is so clueless about all the stuff I have gotten rid of that belonged to him. He even had notebooks/textbooks from college.... and he is in his 50's!! When I was going through stuff in our closet, I found camping stuff that he bought when we first got married in 1997 with the intention of going camping. We have never gone camping!!

Teacher Terry

1-8-20, 1:21pm

That’s funny! My husband doesn’t like to throw anything away so when he goes out of town I take advantage.

iris lilies

1-8-20, 1:24pm

Husband is so clueless about all the stuff I have gotten rid of that belonged to him. He even had notebooks/textbooks from college.... and he is in his 50's!! When I was going through stuff in our closet, I found camping stuff that he bought when we first got married in 1997 with the intention of going camping. We have never gone camping!!

uhhhh, 30+ years here of marriage and his college textbooks live on in our attic.

The only way I can stay sane is to draw boundaries around areas of our real estate where he may not place “stuff.”

For our Hermann house, i have told him the entire basement is his. The first floor is mine. We will probably compromise on the 2nd floor. Seems fair to me.oh, and he will get the entire double +garage less 10% and at least one storage shed.

Also, he will be entirely responsible for cleaning out and moving it all when we change houses. I wont be exerting myself on old crap.

Teacher Terry

1-8-20, 1:25pm

I also do zones like IL. His are his office, huge shed and garage. However, I have gotten rid of stuff from all of them.

klunick

1-8-20, 1:45pm

uhhhh, 30+ years here of marriage and his college textbooks live on in our attic.

The only way I can stay sane is to draw boundaries around areas of our real estate where he may not place “stuff.”

For our Hermann house, i have told him the entire basement is his. The first floor is mine. We will probably compromise on the 2nd floor. Seems fair to me.oh, and he will get the entire double +garage less 10% and at least one storage shed.

Also, he will be entirely responsible for cleaning out and moving it all when we change houses. I wont be exerting myself on old crap.

I also do zones like IL. His are his office, huge shed and garage. However, I have gotten rid of stuff from all of them.

Before our detached garage was built, we had various car parts all over the house. As soon as the last nail was hammered in, I started putting everything outside. Because my husband snores, he got banished to the basement to sleep. He pretty much lives down there now because the computer is down there too and he plays some online train computer game all the time. He still has stuff on the table down there that was placed there Christmas Day 2018!!! Never been touched/used. Drives me nuts!!!

Teacher Terry

1-8-20, 2:56pm

klunick

1-8-20, 3:59pm

Your husband should be tested for sleep apnea. I snored horribly and was diagnosed at 57 after much nagging from my husband. The CPAP machine ended that. Untreated it destroys your major organs. When I sit in the living room I can see a little of my kitchen. When in the kitchen you can see all of the dining room so needed continuity in colors.
He was tested and just resisted getting a CPAP for so long. Finally got one and loves it. But by then, we were both enjoying sleeping in a bed by ourselves, he just stayed down there.

razz

1-8-20, 7:07pm

:welcome:

klunick

1-9-20, 4:28am

Thanks everyone for the warm welcome.:cool:

danna

1-9-20, 12:08pm

Teacher Terry

1-9-20, 12:11pm

Danna, when I get frustrated with my husband’s junk I remind myself that I would be heartbroken without him. We have so much fun together. After 2 bad marriages this one is awesome.

klunick

1-9-20, 12:25pm

Glad you have found us. Welcome from South Western ON Canada!
Been here for years and love it!
Widow who was married 47 years to the nicest "Pack Rat" anyone
ever want to meet but, still a "Pack Rat". Don't miss his stuff
(I have gotten rid of most of it) but, still miss him. Not a good trade off!

Sounds like you had yourself a good one. Mine is a self confessed jerk but I guess he is my jerk and I picked him so.... :laff: Unfortunately my oldest is my husband on steroids so I will have be constantly apologizing to his future wife for the rest of my life. :(

SiouzQ.

1-9-20, 12:31pm

I'm living in the desert southwest; I totally understand the need to take a cooler & ice for grocery shopping!
Welcome Aboard the Boards!

SteveinMN

1-9-20, 4:57pm

Hello and welcome, Kelly!

happystuff

1-9-20, 6:46pm

Hello, Kelly! Right there with you on a child who loves clothes - LOL!

kib

1-10-20, 12:06am

Before our detached garage was built, we had various car parts all over the house. As soon as the last nail was hammered in, I started putting everything outside. Because my husband snores, he got banished to the basement to sleep. He pretty much lives down there now because the computer is down there too and he plays some online train computer game all the time. He still has stuff on the table down there that was placed there Christmas Day 2018!!! Never been touched/used. Drives me nuts!!!Lol. Same here. I have fantasies of sneaking in with a Sharpie and dating everything like an archeological dig. I joke, if you want to find anything, just measure up from the flat surface. 1" = 2013. 12" = 2017. By the time one of us goes, the Stuff edifice may need structural support.

ETA: I sleep on a tempurpedic mattress on the floor of our bedroom - just far enough away from the noise and "bed rock" twitching and thrashing to sleep, still close enough to be ... there. I understand the pull between partnership and singledom, believe me.

Teacher Terry

1-10-20, 1:36am

We have a king size bed but love sleeping together.

klunick

1-11-20, 10:55am

We have a king size bed but love sleeping together.

I am sure most people enjoy sleeping together. But what is funny is that I tell people that we have our own beds and they are like, "oh I wish I could do that. My spouse snores like a jackhammer." I don't really sleep alone though. My two cats seem to think the bed is theirs and I'm just an annoying visitor that takes up space.

Alan

1-11-20, 11:14am

I am sure most people enjoy sleeping together. But what is funny is that I tell people that we have our own beds and they are like, "oh I wish I could do that. My spouse snores like a jackhammer." I don't really sleep alone though. My two cats seem to think the bed is theirs and I'm just an annoying visitor that takes up space.
I'm a snorer and several years ago my wife began getting up in the middle of the night and moving to our guest bedroom. Once that became a nightly occurrence I volunteered to simply move into the smaller room as long as we both retained spontaneous visitation rights. We both sleep wonderfully now.

klunick

1-11-20, 11:29am

I'm a snorer and several years ago my wife began getting up in the middle of the night and moving to our guest bedroom. Once that became a nightly occurrence I volunteered to simply move into the smaller room as long as we both retained spontaneous visitation rights. We both sleep wonderfully now.

I used to get up and move to the spare bedroom as well. Plus husband getting into bed would wake me up anyway. He felt bad for the snoring and the waking me up so he just decided it would be easier to just sleep in the spare bedroom so we could both get a good night sleep.

catherine

1-11-20, 11:50am

To the snorers and partners of snorers: Go for a sleep study. If you are snoring because of apnea, a CPAP is a GIFT to your partner and to yourself, if it reunites you in the same bed and reduces health risks. DH has a CPAP and never mind him--I love it.

Teacher Terry

1-11-20, 11:53am

I no longer snore with my cpap.

klunick

1-11-20, 12:31pm

klunick

1-19-20, 6:14pm

I have noticed that I am really second guessing myself about throwing certain things away because I am afraid of "going too far". For example, there was a dehumidifier and an electric heater fan thingy in the linen closet that hadn't been used in 20 years. In the pantry was several lunchboxes and cooler type things that also hadn't been used in years. No reason to keep them but I couldn't get rid of them for some reason. After debating with myself, I finally pulled the trigger and tossed them.

The more I tell myself I am at a good place with decluttering unused items, the more I worry about getting rid of too much and people seeing how little we have, they will think we are weird. :ohwell:

But I have to say seeing a shelf full of unused items go out of the house or the floor of a closet get cleared out really makes me feel happy at the end of the day. Plus I just made it that more easier on myself to clean. The time it takes to clean has decreased expediently and if people stop by unexpectedly, I am not stressed or embarrassed about how the house will look. :biggrin: