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View Full Version : What makes you feel loved?



gimmethesimplelife
6-12-22, 6:19pm
For me it would be unexpected thoughtful gestures. Just this past week my hours reached 45 and I was sent home due to new OT policy. So I go right home, secretly grateful as it's getting pre-monsoon nasty hot here - only to find SO in the kitchen attempting to make schnitzel from a recipe Astrid sent him.

It didn't turn out too good, much like my attempt to make chicken mole once. But that's not the point. I was so deeply touched it's like I fell in love all over again.

Gotta say - as much as I bitch and complain, in this one area I truly did win the lottery.

Rob

Yppej
6-12-22, 6:22pm
People who still want to spend time with even though we differ over public policy or politics.

iris lilies
6-12-22, 6:56pm
For me it would be unexpected thoughtful gestures. Just this past week my hours reached 45 and I was sent home due to new OT policy. So I go right home, secretly grateful as it's getting pre-monsoon nasty hot here - only to find SO in the kitchen attempting to make schnitzel from a recipe Astrid sent him.

It didn't turn out too good, much like my attempt to make chicken mole once. But that's not the point. I was so deeply touched it's like I fell in love all over again.

Gotta say - as much as I bitch and complain, in this one area I truly did win the lottery.

Rob
Awwww, that’s nice Rob.

I agree that when your spouse does some thing/ gives you something that recognizes your unique taste and values, that is extra special. I’m pretty much an Act of Service girl in the love language business.

KayLR
6-13-22, 7:23pm
When I'm feeling really down, my DH just comes over, puts his arm around me, holds my hand, and doesn't say a word.

jp1
6-13-22, 7:54pm
When I'm feeling really down, my DH just comes over, puts his arm around me, holds my hand, and doesn't say a word.

I can totally understand that. Early in sO’s and my relationship when he would complain about some work issue or something that one of his family members had done that annoyed him I tried offering suggestions. He would get more annoyed and explain why my suggestion wouldn’t work. (Now that I know the various typical situations and the personalities of many of the people involved I know that he’s right, most of these things that annoy him just are. And will never change). So now when he gripes I just listen and agree with him. It’s not in his nature to stay angry about something once he has expressed himself so once I have validated his feelings he moves on and is happy again (as he generally is).

I’m very much the same so it was an easy transition for me to stop offering advice. With a couple of my friends the dynamic is different and they do want advice so I will still offer it.

gimmethesimplelife
6-19-22, 9:11pm
When I'm feeling really down, my DH just comes over, puts his arm around me, holds my hand, and doesn't say a word.SO does this for me from time to time, too. When the first news of the atrocities done to Ukranian civilians came to light, I was unable to get up and move around and even talking was hard. For me it was horrible as here's the other side of my bloodline arrogantly acting with no regard for human life. SO just held me and didn't say a word. Very healing. I was then able to get up and go to work and deal. There is something about supportive touch that is so healing.

Rob