Aging and remaining open-minded

[Eric]

As I get older, I find there is a tendency for my perspective becoming increasingly focused and narrow based on past experiences and knowledge. What things do people here do to help with remaining open-minded to new experiences, new ways of thinking, new ways of doing things, etc., as they age?

[iris lilies]

Excellent question!

A small thing for me is to visit a new place. And I don’t mean it has to be across the state across the country or across the world. I mean just a new place in my town. Take an afternoon and do some thing different, see an historical site or an art museum or a new town.

Routine is an intellect killer.

I just read an article in “the American Gardener” magazine about how garden clubs need to change and grow with modern times. Good basic article about the general state of garden clubs and plant societies. It didn’t say anything new, but it summarized the problems in attracting new and younger audiences. Old routines and ways of doing things kill interest in the organization.

I think of one plant society I belong to that, while the national organization has its act together with digital communications and digital products, the regionals and the locals are just flailing about because they’re paper dependent.

That is too bad because they have such a good model at the national level as to what they should be doing.

This reminds me that I have a question to ask about zoom meetings, so I’ll go off on a different thread to ask it.

[Teacher Terry]

My mom was always the first to try new things, etc. I am trying to do the same.

[KayLR]

It is hard to filter out all your past experience and wisdom to open yourself to new thoughts. I choose not to discard it altogether, but in the interest of cooperation and desire for tolerance across the board, I am willing to listen to new ideas...hoping that my experience will also be respected. I'm not willing to become set in my ways yet, but at the same time, not willing to be canceled just because I'm older. Times change and processes update. We need to adapt or get out of the way. That said, collective wisdom of past experience has a place in the discussion.

As for "trying new things"...I'm always up for that.

[JaneV2.0]

I'm kind of limited lately in the adventure department, but my interests are all over the place--not static, so I'm not worried about getting too focused. Too much focus has never been my problem anyway.:D

[catherine]

I try not to engage in discussions about "the good old days" and to remind myself that the world belongs to the younger generations. I'm just in the sidecar at this point in my life.

But, like others, I try to approach all things with "beginner's mind"--even those things I've done forever.

[Yppej]

I have changed some of my political beliefs completely in the last 2 1/2 years, so I think I'm openminded. Sometimes I worry though it will be too hard for me to move and adust to a new place and it will never happen. Still I signed up for a New Hampshire open house weekend next month.

[JaneV2.0]

I have changed some of my political beliefs completely in the last 2 1/2 years, so I think I'm openminded. Sometimes I worry though it will be too hard for me to move and adust to a new place and it will never happen. Still I signed up for a New Hampshire open house weekend next month.

I bet it will be a lot easier than you think. Once you settle on a potential community, rent a motel room for a week and explore. I'd been to Seattle several times before we crossed the bridge into Bellevue, and I'd found my place. It was nearly immediate. You might take longer.

[pinkytoe]

Remain curious about everything and get excited about possibilities. Try really hard to see the other side of things. Hang out with younger people and children sometimes. It has been very interesting to have spent most of my adult life in a very progressive city and the last five in somewhat the opposite environment. It feels like a time warp as attitudes here are often stuck in some other era. Old people (I'm one too) fussing about things like restricted lawn watering or electric cars.

[Rogar]

Some of the big things don't matter nearly as much as they did and I find there are smaller things make me happy or are especially interesting.

I think as a generality among again people I am familiar with there is a tendency to be less tolerant and more critical. It does seem like a bit of a trap to avoid. I don't have any magic suggestions to help with that, but when you realize you're not going to live to be a hundred and there's not a lot of sense to being angry or bored between now and then, it makes a difference.

I'm not sure how important being open-minded is, as much as life is a learning experience.

[EasyLivingMe]

Routine is an intellect killer.


My mom was always the first to try new things, etc.


Remain curious about everything and get excited about possibilities.

I think all of the above are important, and have to do with something called neuroplasticity, or brain plasticity. Neuroplasticity is the brain's ability to alter its connections — to re-wire itself. Without this ability a person's brain wouldn't properly develop from birth on through adulthood. It also wouldn't be able to recover (to some degree) from a brain injury.

One of the best things about neuroplasticity is that while it lessens with age, it never ends. No matter your age, you can still encourage your brain to remain "plastic." That improves memory, allows you to process information better, improves communication skills, and can even lessen anxiety and depression.

There are nutritional supplements that help with neuroplasticity. But there also simple, non-drug and non-dietary ways to keep your brain developing new pathways. Reading a book (especially fiction) helps. Don't get trapped in always sticking to routine - vary it up a bit. That challenges your brain. Continuing to learn helps. It doesn't really matter what it is you're learning - it's the process of learning, and practicing, something new that makes the brain stronger.

[Chicken lady]

I teach.

it surrounds me with some of the most interest human beings I will ever know. They challenge me to think every day.

[ApatheticNoMore]

It's ok to learn new things and do new things, but to remain as open minded as one was in one's teens or 20s one would have to have as little knowledge of the world as one did then it seems. I mean some of what looks like closed mindedness might just be knowing something. The world of course also changes so not everything one knew might still be the case. That's the tricky part.

[rosarugosa]

It's ok to learn new things and do new things, but to remain as open minded as one was in one's teens or 20s one would have to have as little knowledge of the world as one did then it seems. I mean some of what looks like closed mindedness might just be knowing something. The world of course also changes so not everything one knew might still be the case. That's the tricky part.

I think in a lot of ways I have become more open-minded than when I was younger. I have more insight into knowing how much I do not know, and I don't tend to see things in such black and white terms.

[Tybee]

Eric, my experience has been so different. As I have passed 65,I have noticed so many things changing, have so many new challenges, have seen so much of end of life issues that I knew nothing about--I feel actually that the opposite is true, and that constant critical thinking just to cope with reality is required. It seems I am constantly reevaluated my life, people in general, ways of being, and consciousness itself--so getting older has been something of a mind trip and a roller coaster.

[frugal-one]

I agree Tybee. This may be unrelated but…. today’s discussion of the most recent mass shooting killer said they described themselves as nonbinary. Had to read what exactly does this mean?? It seems so unreal to me to think a person does not necessarily associate themselves with either gender. huh? It does not compute to me. One place listed 4 different genders….. It is hard to comprehend.

[Alan]

One place listed 4 different genders….. It is hard to comprehend.
Another place listed 74. What Are the 72 Other Genders? Gender Identity List & Child Awareness (medicinenet.com) (https://www.medicinenet.com/what_are_the_72_other_genders/article.htm)

[iris lilies]

I agree Tybee. This may be unrelated but…. today’s discussion of the most recent mass shooting killer said they described themselves as nonbinary. Had to read what exactly does this mean?? It seems so unreal to me to think a person does not necessarily associate themselves with either gender. huh? It does not compute to me. One place listed 4 different genders….. It is hard to comprehend.
Careful there, borderline “hate” speech (And I deliberately am using hate in quotes.)

One thought in this issue is that perhaps there are not 74 genders, or even 4 genders.

Also I’m reading that kids have moved on from being trans and now non-binary is the most common non-cis gender which seems logical to me.

[frugal-one]

borderline hate speech because I don’t comprehend? As you would say…. “I am old” and this is not in my wheelhouse.

[frugal-one]

Another place listed 74. What Are the 72 Other Genders? Gender Identity List & Child Awareness (medicinenet.com) (https://www.medicinenet.com/what_are_the_72_other_genders/article.htm)

Read through a few definitions and, to me, does not seem like definitions of gender but sometimes feelings we all experience (and no, I didn’t make a list or remember which ones). Seems a bit over the top. I don’t get it.

[JaneV2.0]

I agree Tybee. This may be unrelated but…. today’s discussion of the most recent mass shooting killer said they described themselves as nonbinary. Had to read what exactly does this mean?? It seems so unreal to me to think a person does not necessarily associate themselves with either gender. huh? It does not compute to me. One place listed 4 different genders….. It is hard to comprehend.

When you consider intersex conditions (endocrine or otherwise)--and the influence of persistent environmental factors, it's not surprising we have more variety than the usual binary choices.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5017538/

I have a friend who identifies as "genderqueer," and even after consulting Google, I'm not entirely sure what that means.

[catherine]

This may be unrelated but…. today’s discussion of the most recent mass shooting killer said they described themselves as nonbinary.

A great example of a non-binary person is Asia Kate Dillon and the character they played on the episodic series Billions. Their character was so compelling to me and from it, I came to understand that they simply choose to not identify as male or female. Here they are explaining what it means to be non-binary:

https://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/billions-actor-asia-kate-dillon-explains-means-binary/story?id=52317585

[happystuff]

A great example of a non-binary person is Asia Kate Dillon and the character she played on the episodic series Billions. Her character was so compelling to me and from it, I came to understand that they simply choose to not identify as male or female. Here they are explaining what it means to be non-binary:

https://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/billions-actor-asia-kate-dillon-explains-means-binary/story?id=52317585

This explanation gave me a light bulb moment... i.e. "female" is an assigned sex while "non-binary" is a gender identity. These are not mutually exclusive!

[iris lilies]

A great example of a non-binary person is Asia Kate Dillon and the character they played on the episodic series Billions. Their character was so compelling to me and from it, I came to understand that they simply choose to not identify as male or female. Here they are explaining what it means to be non-binary:

https://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/billions-actor-asia-kate-dillon-explains-means-binary/story?id=52317585

Fiction can provide good insight into human thoughts, feelings, and emotions. I know that I have developed deeper understanding of some behaviors based on reading about fictional characters.

I do not understand WHY people seem to be so married to ideas of rigid sex roles. Didnt Second Wave feminism free us from those black and white ideas? Why are so many youth seemingly mired in pre-1965 ideas? Get with the program, kids!

To counter the actor from Billions quoted in catherine’s article,, here is actor Hunter Shafer’s words about themselves:

“…And as I’ve learned more about my community and come to understand gender as a spectrum, and the gender binary as something that’s nonexistent and a construct and a product of colonialism, I have sort of let go of the idea that I need to do the one or the other—and just let myself be."

[iris lilies]

My brother visited us over Thanksgiving and as we always do when we get together, we talked about a person from our tiny home town who showed us, 50 years ago, classic trans identity. Teri Toye was her name, her birth name was the same name she has had throughout her life, handy because it is a forename not tied to one sex.

Teri went on from our tiny town to run with the Andy Warhol/Debbie Harry/Halston/Stephen Sprague New York City crowd. She pioneered trans runway modeling and was famous for her languid, pouty style.

https://www.gettyimages.com/photos/teri-toye