View Full Version : Simplicity as a means to provide more options for life
This was inspired by a thread started by Acorn in another forum, but I didn't want to run away with that thread.
This may sound heretical on this board, but I do not equate simplicity with frugality. Gasp! :~) I'm attracted to simplicity because I want to live intentionally, and simplicity provides me with options. Frugality has been the means, but never the goal. I spend plenty on things I want, but I find ways to do without or cut corners on the things that are less important to me in order to do that.
I was in my 20's still when I made the decision to live differently. I was a yuppie wannabe, with an engineering degree and going to grad school at night for my MBA. I had the leather briefcase, and the pumps and suits and thought I was all that. Meanwhile, I had a string of jobs that left me frustrated: I didn't understand the politics of life at all, and I often had to deal with people who's sole power and joy in life was in making life miserable for their underlings etc.
I wanted to have more options over my work life, I wanted to be able to more easily walk away when I wasn't being treated with respect or when the work was no longer rewarding. While I was making a reasonable salary for a young person, it wasn't a lot, and my husband made much less than me. The only way I could see that middle class people who didn't play the lottery were going to be able to have options later in life was to not buy so much stuff, and not be in any debt.
Fast forward 25 years. I have a modest house which is paid for, and we drive modest cars (also paid for) and I'm sure some people write me off as not being "successful" (I know my conspicuous consumption neighbor across the street has, and my mom once made a remark about her friend's kids having "big, beautiful houses"). However, we have a financial cushion that would be surprising to most. I still am intentional about purchases, and put a great deal of thought and research into what I buy, even when I could afford to just go ahead and purchase a gadget at the first retail outlet I see. Its not about the money, its about the value I think I will obtain in exchange for the money (what features am I buying, and what's the best option for getting these features).
Having a cushion has enabled me to take some risks at work that I needed to for personal growth, as well as enable me to try out starting my own business, and weather current economic storms without a steady job. I have so much more flexibility than I would have had with a traditional consumerist/yuppie lifestyle.
There are downsides to being in a comfortable financial space to be sure- my unwillingness to put up with much BS is probably the biggest one, but I am grateful for having stumbled upon Your Money or Your Life many years ago, before I even got fully entrenched in a yuppie lifestyle.
I'm never going to be a visionary, saving the world with a product or a service. I'm never going to be an important company mucky muck. I'm never going to be one of those dreaded Rich People that are vilified today. But I am content, have a low stress life, have the luxury of time that many don't have and am (mostly) at peace with where I am. And I'm ok with that.
Originally posted by Herbgeek.
This may sound heretical on this board, but I do not equate simplicity with frugality.I don't either per se, but I personally enjoy (and live for) combining the two together. So complimentary of one another they are... Not to mention, I enjoy the fun-ness of it all, too. But that's just me........
P.S. your type, is the epitome of, the poster-child of (if you don't mind me using that analogy to define this), and the true definition of what I admire, respect, and yearn to be like, and so far so good! When the hammer fell in 2009 and everyone was walking around with glum faces and filled with doom and gloom, DH and I carried on, without concern or worry. No big mortgage payment, no car payment(s), no payments (period). We slept at night, comfortably.
One thing I'm learning the older I get, is that there are a lot of things available to us (you and I and others, who are financially secure and comfortable), yet that doesn't necessarily mean that just because we can do it, or have it, we have to follow through with those thoughts or ideas and dig ourselves in.
I'm still confused as to why nearly everyone DH and I know, all have to play the part and act like someone they aren't. I ask myself daily (sometimes), "whatever happened to the days when families lived in the same home for an entire generation, or drove the same comfortable reliable vehicle for years and years, and just enjoyed the things made available to them right on their very doorstep".
Definitely don't want to sound-off, or come across as some sort of cheap guru of sorts, casting my opinions and affirmations anyone's way, but I congratulate you on your success and simplicity, Herbgeek! Like I mean a job really well done!!! Doing things right (and living happy and right) is like a balanced wheel on a bicycle. No friction, and it turns and turns, effortlessly. (So efficient). Just like simplicity and frugality, efficiency at it's best!
Herbgeek I do not equate the frugality with simplicity either. I think for most of us frugality is important because it limits our choices, and limiting choices can help us focus on our priorities. Becoming a sahm really helped me prioritize and unless I was frugal I couldn't stay at home. I think it is really difficult to find a level of contentment when we are constantly bombarded by external influences telling us otherwise.
Mrs-M, I feel the same confusion when I see the constant consumption that happens all around. It's really alienating. Most of us have everything we need, but we just can't see it.
Frugality to me is both a means to and end (early retirement so I can do what I want each day) as well as just my natural way of being. I prefer things that are inexpensive or free so I gravitate to those things irregardless of if I'm trying to save a buck or two. Most things I enjoy in life just happen to be free anyways. I also am frugal because I'm a natural minimalist and can't stand "stuff" as well as I am an environmental whacko and want to have the lightest possible footprint on the planet as I can. Not buying stuff, reusing, recycling and not spending alot of money seem to go hand in hand with environmentalism for me.
Acorn. Oh boy, do I ever agree with you on the alienating part. I've gone through steps and stages Re: my feelings related to comfort and discomfort perpetuated through my desire to practice practical living, however after much pondering, I came to the assumption that everything I do related to simplicity and frugality, pleases me, makes me happy, rewards me, and provides me with utmost contentment, and suddenly, realizing all the good and benefits that come my way as a result of my personal choices and defining decisions I make in life and how I choose to live my life, there it was, the whole alienation thing vaporized.
Now when I do things simply and frugally, I feel like a trailblazer, a pioneer, a trendsetter! I just love the feeling I get from setting myself apart from the ordinary :)
Mrs-M, I feel the same confusion when I see the constant consumption that happens all around. It's really alienating. Most of us have everything we need, but we just can't see it.
Me too. Sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with me, when I look at the rest of the world. Its not that I don't desire the SHINY gadgets, its that I realize what I'm trading away in order to do so. Sometimes its worth it to me (my iTouch) to spend the money, but most times it isn't.
Being long term unemployed, I have a lot of time on my hands to really consider my blessings. And every day there is something, and often times a lot to be grateful for. I am overcome with joy sometimes just thinking about having my health, having a very happy marriage, not having significant money worries, having my family close by, the new grand niece, really yummy meals now that I have time to fix them etc. It makes me want to slap the heck out of people who constantly complain that they don't have enough, when to me, it seems like they already have an excess and don't appreciate what they have.
Its like those kids who are overloaded at Christmas- there are so many presents to open, the kid yawns and just wants whatever is next. Whereas the kid who only has a couple of things that they really wanted Santa to bring is content and enjoys them.
I do appreciate these boards more than I can really articulate- I really do feel like odd person out most of the time when I'm out in public and look around at what I see.
loosechickens
10-6-11, 3:24pm
I agree completely, herbgeek.......the frugality has never been an end in itself for us, but merely because we could see that being frugal where it wasn't all that important to us to spend meant that money would accumulate that we could spend freely for what we DID want to do or have.
Many of those who have observed our way of life, are mightily surprised when we up and write a check for some huge amount for something, but it's that habit of frugality much of the time that has allowed us to be in a position to spend when we really do want to.
It's all about quality of life for us......frugality is just one of the tools we use to ensure more choices and more freedom in our lives. Not interested in just "cheeseparing" for it's own sake, at all.
You all have touched on so many things I relate to, which reaffirms to me that I belong here, and that us SL minded folk tend to think the same and act the same. One area where I have seen and noticed change related to my simple living and frugal ways, is that I blank most everything around me (newfangled products and consumerism things/stuff). Unless I actually need something and/or am specifically looking for something in particular, none of it registers. I simply make my way to each section I require goods from, select what I'm after, then away I go. Simple as that! No looking, no wondering, no curiosity whatsoever.
In a nutshell, simplicity not only provides a means in which to accentuate and accelerate added options in life, it actually gives life! Just think about the stress-free lifestyle most of us set ourselves up with and gear our lives towards, the health benefits of that alone. Staggering... One of my all-time favourite mantras is, "keep it simple, don't complicate things". There's a lot to be said about that.
For me, simple living and frugal living go hand in hand. But spending $$ on good quality needed items is just good sense in my book.
I have a dear friend that believes she is frugal because she clips the occasional store coupon and she still buys whatever she wants, whenever she wants to. :o)
Frugality and simplicity can most certainly be diametrically opposed in some instances, and I'll go for simple whenever I can afford to do so. I'm sure I could eventually prune and saw my way through the two overgrown juniper bushes flanking my front steps, but I'm having a tree service take care of it so I can get on with planting things that need to be planted in the fall, remodeling/redecorating a room that's been an unused eyesore for several years, and getting my shed decluttered and reorganized before winter hits. Then I can cozy down, guilt-free, and do my artwork and crafts and plan for next year's garden all winter.
In some things, however, I notice that I *have* to go for cheap in order to get simplicity, like a coffee-maker without bells and whistles and a two week learning curve. Even my bottom-of-the-line Tracphone has more features than I care to learn. My eleven year old Honda will have to be demolished in a wreck before I ever let go of it since I now know how to operate every feature, and there weren't a lot of them in Y2K. It fits me like my favorite pair of old jeans.
And yes, being as frugal and simple as possible is quite freeing. I have no debts and seldom subscribe to any services that are billed monthly unless they prove to be well worth it. I can choose to live a little more cheaply this month so I can give a few small gifts to friends, because I know how to do that without feeling deprived, and I get a great deal of joy from surprising someone with a small but thoughtful present. I've just rediscovered papercraft, which is a very inexpensive way to make any number of decorative and useful items. And on and on.
My only regret about voluntary simplicity is that I didn't start pursuing it earlier in life!
It seems like frugality has a bad image in society. It is associated with being cheap. I imagine a good portion of the population associates frugality with unhappiness/deprivation and spending money with happiness/indulgence. The idea of optional frugality is foreign to so many people and simplicity is an idea beyond that. Some people just can't see it and I often wonder what is the key to helping someone see for oneself.
It seems like frugality has a bad image in society. It is associated with being cheap. I imagine a good portion of the population associates frugality with unhappiness/deprivation and spending money with happiness/indulgence. The idea of optional frugality is foreign to so many people and simplicity is an idea beyond that. Some people just can't see it and I often wonder what is the key to helping someone see for oneself.
I learned a lot about being happy-though-poor while recovering from a back injury and living on Workers' Comp. At the urging of my P.T., who was concerned that I'd lose the "good habits" of having a job (such as being on time, doing work I might not enjoy, et cetera), I volunteered at my church's emergency food pantry. I loved it. When I wasn't helping down and out folks choose and bag their food allotment, I was at home writing grant proposals, and was thrilled when some of them were funded. While I only had a few dollars in excess of my monthly bills, I had a great time shopping the thrift stores and going to library book sales where I could get a paperback book for $.25. I learned, up close and personal, the meaning of "Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without." It actually became fun to see how far a tiny bit of money could go, and I was a lot healthier than I had been as a working stiff because I had to make nearly everything from scratch and exercising for the back pain was mandatory.
Perhaps everyone should be required, as a school project, to go through several months of low-budget living and learn the lesson that happiness is not found in having lots of money and stuff.
Originally posted by Acorn.
It seems like frugality has a bad image in society. It is associated with being cheap.So true, but I am seeing a turning of the tides, albeit slowly. We live in a small community, so I do think frugality tends to win over on a stronger level and with a stronger following in lower populated rural areas such as ours. Smaller communities like ours tend to embrace frugality with acceptance and approval.
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