View Full Version : My dear husband is in Pallative Care with days to weeks to live...
Please send us all of your good thoughts and prayers that he can go without too much pain and be as peaceful as possible for him, myself and family.
He was admitted to hospital under Pallative Care on Wed and we had been doing it at home for the previous six weeks with help for from Family Doctor and Community Nurse, but he was starting to lose his balance and I was too afraid for him.
Story was diagnosed with Stage 4, Grade 4, Kidney Cancer Aug 2010,
surgery Nov 4, 2010 and then a chemo drug starting Jan 4, 2011. The CT scan
April 2011 showed he had skrinkage and things looked promising, but by end of June 2011 the drug had stopped working and the cancer had spread very aggressively to the plureal (sp?) around the left lung and a spot on the spine. This past summer has had 4 trip to emerg with two admissions, serveral procedures and one surgery to try and remove fluid none of which worked. Also, a second chemo drug that just caused a lot of side effects and did not help at all. A third hospital stay 7 weeks ago when the good kidney failed, hemogolin low and other issues. They settled all that down the then made the move to palliative care. So hard to be told this and feel so helpless except to keep him as comfortable as possible. This is a very loved man of 67 who was so well, fit and still helping in his club, community, friends and family. My only comfort at this time is how much our wonderful son, daugther and dil, all other family and friends have been here for us.
I know I will be okay in time but right now it is really difficult to see that.
Thank you for letting me share this with you all...
Sending my deepest strength to you and your husband. Take care of yourself.
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers...hoping for a peaceful and painless passing for your husband! God bless you.
I'm so sorry Danna. We just lost my MIL to lung cancer a few weeks back so I have an inkling of what you're going through. I'm praying for you all.
Danna, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope your husband passes peacefully and painlessly. May God console you in this time of difficulty.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death (or through the darkest valley),
I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.--the 23nrd Psalm.
my deepest condolences to you, your husband and family as you want through this bardo and into the next (in buddhism, a bardo is a phase of death, and there are several phases -- the first as coming toward death). I will also pray for a peaceful passing into the next bardo, and likewise for your family as you move into the more subtle layers of grief from the loss.
blessings on you all.
chrisgermany
11-7-11, 4:28am
I am so sorry for you and your family. Sending good wishes to make the best of the days to come.
Heartfelt condolences to you, danna. Best wishes to you and your family as you bear this time of sadness and coming loss.
danna thank you for allowing us to share this burden...I hope it is just a little bit lighter. Please know that this community of strangers who are now friends are sending positive energy to you. As my mother was dying all my efforts went into keeping "grace & dignity" in her passage.
Sending thoughts of loving support to you and your family at this time.
My thoughts are with you and your family, danna, at this challenging time.
I'm so sorry, Danna. Prayers of peace, healing and comfort are coming to you, your husband, and your loved ones.
Oh Danna! I was just wondering about you the other day. I am so sorry to hear about your husband. I will keep both of you in my prayers. I wish there was more we could do to support you in this difficult time.
Danna, I'm so sorry to hear that this is happening. My thoughts are with you and all who are involved. My heart goes out to you.
domestic goddess
11-7-11, 8:35am
danna, I am so sorry to hear that all this is happening. It is a difficult road, and a somewhat lonely one. Even though you are with your family and friends, there are some parts you just have to walk alone. Always remember then that you have help from whatever Divine Being you believe in. You, your dh and your family will be in my prayers.
I'm so sorry Danna. My thoughts are with you in this sad time.
jennipurrr
11-7-11, 9:08am
I am so sorry to read this Danna. I will be thinking of you and your family.
Bastelmutti
11-7-11, 9:22am
I'm sorry to hear that Danna. Sending positive thoughts to you and your husband.
(((danna and family))) Many prayers and good thoughts are being sent your way!
Danna, prayers of comfort and an easy passing for your husband. I'm so sorry this journey of your lives together has taken this rough road and I pray you have been blessed with good conversations and times together these last few months. i'm so glad you have family near to walk with you.
Your husband and you and all your family are in my prayers. I pray the time you have left with him is the best it can possibly be.
Thinking of you and your husband, Danna. I'm so sorry.
You are in my thoughts and prayers, Danna.
happy with less
11-7-11, 12:09pm
Danna, I am thinking of you, your husband and your family this morning, and I am including all of you in my daily prayers.
crunchycon
11-7-11, 12:33pm
Danna - I've often thought about you since the early days of your husband's illness. I wish the news were better, but please know you and yours are in my thoughts and prayers.
loosechickens
11-7-11, 2:48pm
We are all so sorry to hear this, Danna, and are sending warm thoughts, prayers and hopes to you, your husband and your family.
rosarugosa
11-7-11, 3:02pm
Danna, Sending you and your family wishes for the best during this difficult time.
Simpler at Fifty
11-7-11, 4:11pm
I am so sorry to hear about this Danna. I remember when you first posted about DHs Cancer. May his passing be very peaceful for all of you.
Dear Danna, We are all holding you and your family close to our hearts as you walk through this valley.
early morning
11-7-11, 5:54pm
(((Danna and family))) I am so sorry to hear this news - thinking of you, hoping for peace and solace for you all...
fidgiegirl
11-7-11, 6:08pm
Danna, I hope your DH is free of pain in his last weeks, and that you have much love between you. I am sorry to hear of this bad turn since I thought I remembered that the last I had read things were looking up. Thinking of you. ((((danna))))
goldensmom
11-7-11, 6:09pm
Praying for peace and comfort, Danna and family.
I'm so sorry. Wishing the entire family peace and strength. 67 is far too young.
Mighty Frugal
11-7-11, 8:33pm
deepest sympathy and prayers for a pain free journey
Hugs and strength to you, Danna. You're a wonderful partner.
Thank you all so much for the hugs, prayers and good thoughts....I sure can use then right now.
Despite how long and hard the summer has been in some ways it was very good...we were closer then we had ever been he knows he has been loved.
I think a while back on posts about long marriages (47 years) I had said ours had many wonderful years, many good years, a few really not so good years (and we both contributed to the making of all of them). We have loved each other deeply, our core values were always on the same page.
But we really could get on each others nerves some times..lol..but we were never bored. I guess I will need to learn to continue on knowing I had all of that. Also, produced two great kids and three grandsons.
Thinking of you. (((((((( danna)))))))))
I am so sorry for you and your family. Sending good wishes to make the best of the days to come.
=1
Danna, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
leslieann
11-8-11, 10:56am
Danna, thanks for posting about this so we can share with you. How good to read that during the summer you were closer than ever before, and that you are confident in his awareness of being loved. Lovely that your family can gather around, too, and I hope that they bring you and your husband light and peace during this season of the year, and season of life. I'll be thinking of you as I light my morning candle.
I'm so sorry to hear this, danna. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. May God extend you an abundance of peace and comfort during this difficult time.
A very tough time, but it sounds like you can take some comfort in your friends and family. That is something we all wish for when we have come to the end of our days.
I'm so sorry Danna, but it's good that you have such wonderful family around you. My thoughts are with you.
Prayers and hope for comfort and peace Danna. Take good care of yourself, too, the rest of your family needs you.
Gardenarian
11-9-11, 5:54pm
Blessings Danna, to you and your family. You sound so strong.
Take good care of yourself during this difficult time, danna. We are here to support you whenever you need us. Sometimes it helps to have a place where you can be honest about what you are feeling and thinking. HOpe we can be that for you.
lhamo
beckyliz
11-10-11, 11:30am
Danna, I am late to this thread, but just want to add that I am thinking of you and your dearest husband at this time. I pray that he goes without pain and in peace.
I'm very sorry, Danna. You and your family will be in my thoughts.
I am so sorry. Bless you and your family.
Like so many others in this community, I am so sorry to hear this, and am keeping you and your husband and family in my prayers, Danna. As difficult as this time is, please come to the forum for support after his passing, also. You will also find support here for that part of your journey....
2:42 a.m. Tuesday November 8th 2011 my beloved husband past away...I now know he is pain free and at peace..
He was very loved and honoured as a lovely, gentle man always there for others...he will be missed forever by all who knew him.
Myself, our son and daughter and three grandson are trying to come to terms, but I am sure it will take a very long time.
We are here for each other and taking support from everyone that is there for us.. Thank you all for being here and offering your support to me.
My deepest condolences to you and you're family. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I will continue to pray for you, (((hugs)))
My sincere sympathy to you and family.
loosechickens
11-13-11, 11:34pm
warm hugs to you and your family, danna........so sorry.
Thank you for letting us know. I wish you every comfort in this time of grief.
So sorry, danna. Glad you have your family close at this difficult time. Take care and reach out to your friends here when you need support. We're here for you.
lhamo
chrisgermany
11-14-11, 4:42am
I am so sorry for your loss.
Danna, I am so sorry to hear this. We send our support and condolences.
Danna I am so sorry for your loss! You and your family are in my prayers!
My sincere condolences to you and your family, Danna. May your dear husband rest in peace. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I am so sorry Danna. Prayers for your family.
So sorry to hear of your loss, danna. I am glad to hear you are surrounded by your family during this difficult time. Thinking of you...
(((danna)))
I am so sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you and your family.
leslieann
11-14-11, 11:35am
Hugs from me, too.....((((((danna))))))).
madgeylou
11-14-11, 12:33pm
i'm so sorry, danna. hold each other tight. <3
My deepest sympathy, Danna. You will be in my prayers.
crunchycon
11-16-11, 7:30pm
Sincerest condolences, Danna. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Gardenarian
11-16-11, 7:46pm
Danna - I'm so sorry to hear about your husband passing. He sounds like a beautiful person.
My sincerest condolences. Yes, it does take a long time, but how wonderful that he knew how loved he was. Take care of yourself.
My sincerest condolences as well, Danna. Gather strength from those around you, and peace be with you and your extended family throughout this transition.
fidgiegirl
11-16-11, 10:14pm
Oh, danna. I am so sorry . . . ((((((danna)))))))
early morning
11-16-11, 11:06pm
So sorry to learn of your husband's passing - thinking of you all, wishing you peace - ((((danna))))
My sincere condolences for your loss Danna. Thinking of you. (((((danna)))))
So soryy to hear about your husband's passing. Wishing you peace and comfort.
thinkgreen
11-17-11, 12:04am
Danna. My deepest sympathies for your loss. You are in my prayers.
Sending sympathies. I'm sorry for your loss.
I had been keeping track of this post, but must have missed your DH's passing. I'm so sorry. Losing someone is such a hard thing.
Like has been said, I'm so glad this past summer was good for you both. I wish the very best to you and your family in dealing with
this great loss.
((((hugs))))
I too missed the news of your husband's passing. I'm so sorry for you and your entire family. If there is anything we can do, let us know. ((((hugs))))
My deepest sympathies, Danna. Saying a prayer for you in hopes of it providing you with the strength, the wisdom, and the courage to move forward with healing.
I am very sorry for your loss, danna. I have been off the 'net for a few days and just found out. Blessings to you and your family.
You have my deepest sympathy for your loss Danna.
frugal-one
11-17-11, 3:07pm
Sincerest condolences danna!!!
Oh Danna, I'm so terribly sorry. I'm sending you all lots of love in this challenging time. May you be surrounded and comforted by your dear friends and family.
Simpler at Fifty
11-17-11, 5:04pm
Danna and family- my sincere sympathy to all of you.
dado potato
11-17-11, 10:11pm
Adding my hugs and condolences to everyone else's...
My condolences. I am so sorry for your loss.
Danna, sending you sincere condolences at this time of tremendous loss.
So sorry, Danna. Gone too soon. Praying peace, strength, and comfort.
Thank you all so much, knowing there is support in ever area of ones life does help at this time. I am just taking it day by day, hour by hour
most are okay, some really are not...I do know I will never forget him or our life together, but hopefully it will all get easier, I am told by so many who have had
to face this it does get easier.
Again thank you all....
dado potato
11-21-11, 6:04pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2ipcBMCXfY
hugs
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