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View Full Version : That heavy feeling in your legs after discovering a mistake, a huge one (rant)



Juicifer
12-22-11, 9:14am
Let me start by making an apology to you, I don't post a lot, I know I should but it's probably hard to imagine how incredible busy a non profit (like the one I work for) can be.

I am assistant executive director. I started as volunteer in this non profit and was then hired. I love grant proposal writing a lot, I love the research and I love it when cheques come in the mail, it gives me a good feeling to help. So, when other organizations asked me if I could help them too, I did.
In the city where we live there is a big United Way chapter, the United Way receives money from corporate giving and disburses that to its member agency. Our organization is a United Way member agency.

I helped the United Way with grant proposal writing as well.
I made the huge mistake to apply for a grant with a big funder for the United Way as well as our own organization (so two separate proposals with the same funder). I received an email from the United Way executive office last Monday that they had received a cheque for a big amount of money. I looked up the proposal I had written and I had requested a lot less, leaving me wondering what had happened.

This morning my executive director complained that we still hadn't heard from that funder and this eerie feeling crept on to me that United Way got our money. There is no way in hell United Way is going to give that money to us. I explained this to my executive just to come clean that I helped them as well and she had a hard time trying to cover her disappointment.

I can't continue my volunteer work for the United Way this way. Above all I feel like a big naive idiot that I hadn't thought about that mixing of interest before. Well now I know.

Float On
12-22-11, 9:28am
Well, I know nothing about grant writing but it sounds like you do a very good job of it. I'd chalk this one up to a learning experience and continue to do a good job of getting grants written for the one that pays you.

iris lily
12-22-11, 9:55am
That's interesting that you get that feeling in your legs. I get it in my stomach. That cliche "sinking feeling" is really what happens to me when an "oh crap--I screwed up!" situation occurs.

This will be a learning experience. You will use it to change and grow. That's what comes out of these experiences. I wish you well!

catherine
12-22-11, 9:59am
Definitely stop beating yourself up! I know how you feel, we've all done those kinds of innocent mistakes. You sound like a conscientious and honest person. I'm sure you'll win a lot more grant money to make up for it!

Mrs-M
12-22-11, 11:08am
Ditto, the advice given. Continue forth and treat this experience as a lesson in education. Instead of being good at your job, you will now be excellent!

By the way, I really like your avatar, Juicifer!

leslieann
12-22-11, 11:16am
No, no! There was an error and the United Way is taking money in excess of the proposal that was submitted! This is NOT OKAY.

They may be happy but they are also not naive enough to believe that funders add dollars to proposals just because they LIKE you. You submitted a proposal from your agency and the FUNDER made an error in disbursement.

This HAS to be fixable. United Way doesn't have to give YOU the money, but they have to give it BACK to the funding agency so that the funder can disburse it properly to you OR send you a rejection letter.

If this is really what happened, it is an error and you are not the person who made it.

And by the way, I get the feeling in my gut, too, not my legs, but I sure know what you mean.

Only after you have exhausted the ways that you could reverse this situation do you give up on it. EVERYONE makes mistakes, and often we make doozies...I know that I have.....but it sounds like the error maybe wasn't yours or not entirely yours. Don't let your shame about making a mistake keep you from correcting things where possible.

kally
12-22-11, 12:36pm
I have found myself in this situation a few times. In my eagerness to help or prove myself I have dropped myself in it a few times. Just take your lumps, apologize, learn from it, and then move on. I mean it, move on.... You are not the first person to make an error like this and you aren't the last.

The big error here though is how you handle it. You have done what you can. Now you need to learn from it, see where you went wrong and drop it. You can be even more useful to your organization in future with this kind of experience under your belt.

Mrs-M
12-22-11, 12:42pm
Leslieann. I wholeheartedly agree. I struggled with understanding the OP entry upon my first read, but what you say makes total sense.

WorldFoodie
12-22-11, 8:50pm
I don't know grant writing/funding so I may be off base with my thoughts. It seems as if the funder may be going with the big "sure" names, since the quality of writing should be the same. Is there any way you could go to them to discretely ask their funding allocation criteria? In doing so you may find perhaps there was an error (either in their office or UW used white out on your proposal). Or it may assist you in future writings to make your group appealing based on the grantor's vision. The "ohhh nooo, uhh ooh" feeling speaks highly of your values. Please don't beat yourself up.

Rogar
12-22-11, 9:46pm
I suppose the bright side of things is that it was your proposal that brought in the funds. If there is no way for the issue to be resolved, at least the money that United Way will keep will go out to other beneficial non-profits. So the money will likely be well used and help those in need.

Bastelmutti
12-26-11, 8:26pm
I agree with leslieann. A relative of mine works in this field and has told me (who does not, but tried to help DD's school with grants once) that with most grants you have account in detail for the way you have spent the money - what happens when United Way reports spending much more money than was in the grant proposal? Wouldn't the funder be annoyed (or more) that they were not notified of the mistake when it happened?