"Nutritionism" and the Kitchen Table [Archive]

catherine

2-20-12, 7:24pm

I'm wondering how many folks have issues with melding the desire to eat together as a family with the recent phenomenon that Michael Pollan calls "nutritionism"--or an obsession with all things food.

So some people won't eat this and others won't eat that, and one family member is on this diet and another is on that diet. It is making the act of putting togehter a simple family meal so complex!!

For example, I became "mostly" vegetarian about 15 years ago, and my DH is a dyed-in-the-wool carnivore, having been raised on Scottish fare. It actually worked fine for us--I'd simply do a meat replacement and we were still kind of flexible.
Since New Year's he's been on an eating plan, which is wonderful for his health. It's moderate, it makes sense, it's very healthy, and I'm thrilled about it in every way. But now we have to each schedule our cooking times! I'm eating one thing, and he's eating another, just because we're both slightly rigid in our food preferences. And they're both good meals! (Tonight he's having turkey burgers with cottage cheese and salad with low-fat dressing; I'm having whole wheat angel hair pasta with roasted zucchini/red pepper/mushrooms in a spicy tomato based sauce).

Kind of crazy, right?? Two people, two different meals... does anyone else run into multiple menus at dinner time?? Am I the only one??

razz

2-20-12, 7:27pm

I got to the point that I resented food due to dietary efforts. Finally, we both decided to go lower-carb to make portion control the focus and I now add lots of variety to make life and eating fun again.

reader99

2-20-12, 8:07pm

I have a lot of food limitations, and my late DH ate mainly kid food - hot dogs, pbj... I cooked two dinners most days for a decade or more

edited to add, we ate together, just ate different food

Rosemary

2-20-12, 8:14pm

It may be kind of crazy, but it's that way in our house, too. I keep a lot of different foods prepped and on hand so that it's not a big deal at any given meal, though. For instance, tonight we're having a spinach-red pepper frittata. DH and I will have steamed broccoli with it. DD doesn't like steamed broccoli, so she'll have sliced, raw brussels sprouts with honey mustard dip. Yesterday when I had some free time I sliced up enough brussels sprouts for a few days - they keep quite well. Tonight while prepping dinner I sliced up a whole red pepper, and now I have some of that ready for salad tomorrow. Also I sauteed the rest of the fresh spinach we had so there's some extra spinach in the fridge for another use. I keep on top of all the containers of food so it doesn't result in waste.

In general, DH and DD eat a lot more carbs and meat than I do. I usually make myself a big salad and put small amounts of those things on it.
In the case of your meal above, I would simply cook enough for a couple of meals each and call it a day. Cooking 2 meals for 2 days works out to be the same amount of time as if you cooked one of those meals on each separate night.

treehugger

2-20-12, 8:19pm

My husband had some severe food restrictions for about 4 years (to control the progression of kidney disease). Since I do most of the cooking (due to our skills- and preference-based division of labor), I dealt with that by creating menus around what he could eat. I did not want to cook 2 different meals, so we just made do with a limited diet for those years, and I got my fix of restricted items (basically, foods with lots of potassium and phosphorus) in easy to fix snacks, or when dining out.

We ate (and still eat) dinner together most nights a week, food restrictions be damned. Our situation was very different than multiple competing dietary preferences at one family or group though. That is definitely getting harder and harder. People need to be willing to compromise if they want to eat together.

Kara

peggy

2-20-12, 8:27pm

My daughter is celiac, and my husband won't eat bread or breaded products most of the time, although he will eat what I call 'purposeful' bread, i.e. pizza, or a piece of cornbread with beans, that sort of thing. But he doesn't want just a hunk of bread with every meal. This is the way he grew up and he found he does much better when he doesn't eat that way. We just adapt, and most meals are shared, so it's all good. I think it helps that I cook most every meal, including lunches, although my husband and daughter have a standing lunch date on Fridays, and that's usually sushi. (<- yuck!) I think the key is to find the things y'all do both enjoy and build your menus around that.

herbgeek

2-20-12, 8:52pm

Hubby eats whatever I make him, but I do accomodate his preferences like not putting mushrooms in things for him. He doesn't have any real health issues that need to be accomodated (other than ahem intestinal sluggishness ;)) Over the years, our diet has changed somewhat to be more from scratch cooking, less processed food and more fruits and veggies. He's gotten me interested in juicing, I've gotten him into some raw food.
s

Anne Lee

2-20-12, 9:51pm

I'm just on the verge of the empty nest. Unless one of the boys was sick, there was no way I would accommodate different meals otherwise I would be cooking for hours every evening.

I understood nutritionism to mean the hyper-focus on "wonder" nutrients rather than food as a whole. Thinking about nutrition is fine. Stressing about whether one is getting enough anti-oxidants or beta-carotene or whathaveyou when one is 20, 40, 100 lbs overweight with high blood pressure is off kilter.

Blackdog Lin

2-20-12, 10:07pm

Personally, I feel very strongly about this. I will NOT cook beyond ONE meal for my family (it's just the two of now though). Never did and never will (and I really think it stood DS in good stead: he grew up learning to eat and like almost absolutely everything!). If one of us comes up with a medical condition that requires special cooking, then the other will learn to cook and eat that way too. Thank goodness we've never had to deal with the issue.

Like you herbgeek, we accomodate each other in our likes and dislikes; but if it came to a real medical necessity - say for instance DH decided he REALLY needed to address his weight, or if I became say gluten-intolerant, then the entire household would have to change recipes and menus. Meals in our house would still be basically one meal for everyone. Life is too short, and good homemade cooking takes too long, to be cooking separate meals for individuals. I am confident in our knowledge of cooking and food to be able to satisfy everyone even in a restricted diet.

But it hasn't come up, so maybe I'm blowing smoke up.....well, you know. :)

Dhiana

2-20-12, 10:36pm

Similar situation here in that I'm vegetarian and my husband is not and he competes in Ironman Triathlons.
Usually I'll make the vegetarian meal whatever that may be w/a side of meat or meat that can be added in easily after I take my portion.
For the meal you mentioned in your post, I probably would have put the roasted vegetables on top of that turkey burger and served it that way.

Somtimes I do get frustrated and want to just hand him a bag of microwave popcorn but then I remind myself this really is a First World Problem =)

catherine

2-20-12, 10:57pm

I understood nutritionism to mean the hyper-focus on "wonder" nutrients rather than food as a whole. Thinking about nutrition is fine. Stressing about whether one is getting enough anti-oxidants or beta-carotene or whathaveyou when one is 20, 40, 100 lbs overweight with high blood pressure is off kilter.

I'm sure you're right about the definition--but beliefs about this particular nutrient vs. that one and having those beliefs drive your eating do's and don'ts which clash with the other person's is kind of where I'm coming from.

Mrs-M

2-21-12, 9:36am

Originally posted by Catherine.
I'm having whole wheat angel hair pasta with roasted zucchini/red pepper/mushrooms in a spicy tomato based sauceWould really love this recipe. Please and thank you.

Thankfully, food limitations in our house don't exist, because planning, preparing, and working around meals (that take into consideration a family of eight), simply does not (realistically) hold any flexibility in the way of dovetailing in individual/personal orders and requests.

Bastelmutti

2-21-12, 9:53am

Yep, same situation here. I have written before about how I mostly try to make "modular" meals - things like lettuce wraps or burrito bowls where you can add and subtract ingredients individually. DH developed both allergies and a mild intolerance to cow's milk/cheese as an adult, so for the past 6 mos. or so, I keep milk/cheese out of his meals. He can do goat cheese but does not like "fake" cheese. DD1 is "pescatarian" - she eats fish occasionally, but is otherwise a lacto-ovo vegetarian and not a fan of meat substitutes. DD2 and I are omnivores, but since DD2 was a baby, she has had a very strong sense of smell and taste, so she prefers foods separate and plain and most veggies uncooked. I do accommodate these preferences, because I feel that they are more ingrained than "just being picky." A typical meal would be something like spaghetti and meatballs with steamed broccoli - I will have everything. DH will skip the parmesan. DD1 will skip the meatballs. DD2 will skip the sauce and have raw broccoli. It works, but does take somewhat more effort, and sometimes I do make DD2 a hot dog or DD1 a quesadilla if they really dislike the main dish.

Bastelmutti

2-21-12, 9:58am

Somtimes I do get frustrated and want to just hand him a bag of microwave popcorn but then I remind myself this really is a First World Problem =)

Yes, I try to remember we're lucky to have this "problem"!

iris lily

2-21-12, 10:13am

DH is pickier than I am and has the waistline to prove it. I love vegetables and he likes only a few of them cooked, but will eat most of them raw. He doesn't eat junk food at all, we don't buy it.

So I cook mounds of cabbage and Brussels sprouts and cauliflower and green beans for me. He'll eat peas and corn and carrots. He eats more variety of green stuff when it is fresh from his garden, but he hates, for instance, green beans from the store. He likes his own. I tend to make 2 things for dinner, a main dish an a salad. Sometimes I make a vegetable instead of a salad, and in that case, it's got to be one of the vegetables that he will eat. He'll eat most everything in a raw salad.

I sort of cook things separately to suit our tastes, sometimes, but not in a major way. Last night, for instance, we had:

soup made of lentils and bulgar wheat and ham bone

I sauteed 1/3 cabbage with onions, garlic, and carrots and DH won't eat that. Since I was cutting up carrots, I made a quick carrot salad for him--just carrots and leftover green onions plus a little dressing. He had a large portion of soup and a salad. I had the cabbage dish and a little soup.

The dogs will have the rest of the soup since this batch wasn't very good. sigh. I wish I could get proportions right on slow cooker soups. The last batch I made was good, just right with water and ingredients and seasoning.

domestic goddess

2-21-12, 10:49am

I make a meal and other can eat it or not. Often they don't, because they are more into fast food around here than I am, and that has colored all their food preferences. I really don't have time to make 6 meals a night around here, which is what it would come to if I started catering to everyone's preferences.

catherine

2-21-12, 10:49am

Would really love this recipe. Please and thank you.

Thankfully, food limitations in our house don't exist, because planning, preparing, and working around meals (that take into consideration a family of eight), simply does not (realistically) hold any flexibility in the way of dovetailing in individual/personal orders and requests.

Mrs-M,

The base recipe came from a GREAT blog I found: Cheap Healthy Good (http://cheaphealthygood.blogspot.com/2007/07/of-eggplants-and-angels.html).

BUT, I modified it to:

Substitute zucchini for eggplant. I had a zucchini, didn't have an eggplant--also, I sometimes feel the eggplant skin is a bit tough.

Added: Mushrooms and onions: Sauteed them with the garlic (actually sauteed the mushrooms after the onions/garlic). I love mushrooms!!

Substituted parmesan cheese for feta: I had parmesan, didn't have feta. Plus parm cheese is cheaper.

Finally, the tomato sauce got its kick because I couldn't find any basil in my spice cabinet (What! No basil?!). So I was afraid it would be bland. Then I remembered I had made veggie fajitas the night before and had a little of the onion/pepper mixture which contained a healthy dose of cumin. So I just took a bit of it of the leftover mixture and threw it in the pot. You wouldn't want to overdo the cumin, but it did give it a nice little kick. I guess you could just add the kind of heat you like the best if you wanted to--or just go with the basil.

Then just cook the whole wheat angel hair as directed and top with the sauce. It was pretty good, if I do say so myself!

Mrs-M

2-21-12, 10:55am

Originally posted by Iris Lily.
I sauteed 1/3 cabbage with onions, garlic, and carrotsMmmm... rubbing my tummy. I'm coming over to your house for dinner one night! :)

Mrs-M

2-21-12, 10:58am

Catherine. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I agree, egg plant skin is far to tough (to chew-into) for my liking.

pinkytoe

2-21-12, 11:13am

jania

2-21-12, 11:49am

I became a vegetarian almost 30 years ago. I never made it a topic of conversation and I never requested specific foods to be prepared for me. While living with my family I ate what was prepared and passed on what I didn't want to eat. I have wavered through the years, going vegan and at one time eating fish or chicken, but I never expect anyone to prepare meals with me in mind.

Karma

2-21-12, 10:35pm

It is funny how meal times have changed since I was a little kid. We had to eat whatever was placed in front of us. The other difference is that people didn't seem to have all the modern afflictions we have now lactose and gluten intolerance, acid reflux, etc. Or maybe they did and didn't know it? The word vegetarian was about as obsolete as the word homosexual. I wonder what has changed with our food/ourselves that food has become such an issue.

Vegetarians and homosexuals have been around for a long time, thank goodness we live on a time when gays and lesbians don't have to live in the closet. Not sure why you had to compare the two.:confused:

Bastelmutti

2-22-12, 9:59am