SiouzQ.
4-20-12, 9:06pm
I am happy to report that I have completed three of five days of the work week and have managed to turn my mood and attitude around pretty well. Nothing on the work front has changed (still no job leads) but I decided to give myself a break from the obsessive worrying about the future which was really ruining my days off. I also had an epiphany the other day and realized what is is I am always searching for...I think at this time in my life I am supposed to take care of my spiritual self, which is sorely lacking in any sort of foundation. I am not a religious person by any means and was not brought up that way; in fact, in my family spirituality was never, ever discussed, and religious people were actually kind of scoffed at. But I realize now my usual methods of coping and modes of thinking are kind of faulty at this point and it is ending up hurting me; it just isn't working anymore and I am tired of myself.
That being said, I asked a co-worker, who is a Buddhist, how one learns about Buddhism and how can I see if it might help me move on in my life. So I am now going to go to a lecture on Sunday morning with a couple of co-workers. This is good because I had made a vow earlier in the month that I was going to try one new thing that was completely out of my comfort zone. Also good is that I'll meet more people and maybe develop a new social group as well. For a long time I have realized hanging out in the bars and doing the music thing has gotten pretty old; I just don't enjoy it the way I used to.
AS far as the work thing, I am trying to accept it for what it is and not let it bug me so much. I also have a better idea of how to fill out those da** applications so I don't sound so desperate. I am filling out these stupid things with a cloud of negativity and panic over me, when I should be doing a better job of selling my skills. I'm still going to need to work on that front but I think I won't spend both my days off doing it so intensely. I gotta have a break sometime to relax and recharge too.
So, I am hanging in there and am looking forward to another cozy night of Mad Men, Season 4, Disc 1.
Thanks to everyone who responded earlier in the week and offered their .02. It really helps that you took the time and I appreciate it.
That being said, I asked a co-worker, who is a Buddhist, how one learns about Buddhism and how can I see if it might help me move on in my life. So I am now going to go to a lecture on Sunday morning with a couple of co-workers. This is good because I had made a vow earlier in the month that I was going to try one new thing that was completely out of my comfort zone. Also good is that I'll meet more people and maybe develop a new social group as well. For a long time I have realized hanging out in the bars and doing the music thing has gotten pretty old; I just don't enjoy it the way I used to.
AS far as the work thing, I am trying to accept it for what it is and not let it bug me so much. I also have a better idea of how to fill out those da** applications so I don't sound so desperate. I am filling out these stupid things with a cloud of negativity and panic over me, when I should be doing a better job of selling my skills. I'm still going to need to work on that front but I think I won't spend both my days off doing it so intensely. I gotta have a break sometime to relax and recharge too.
So, I am hanging in there and am looking forward to another cozy night of Mad Men, Season 4, Disc 1.
Thanks to everyone who responded earlier in the week and offered their .02. It really helps that you took the time and I appreciate it.