What to send for funeral instead of flowers?

[CathyA]

I have a 10 year long cyber friend. We're very close, even though we've never met. We both love nature and spend alot of time in it. I did send a woodland flower arrangement to her dad's funeral a couple years ago. Her mom died the other day, and I was getting ready to send another woodland arrangement, when I thought maybe it would be better to send her (my friend) something more lasting. I think she likes windchimes. I could send a really nice windchime to her.......and when she would hear it, she'd think of her mom??
Any other ideas like that? What do you think?
(And please, nobody tell me how much you hate windchimes........she lives in the country and others probably can't hear them) :~)

[Azure]

When my best friends mother died I sent her a honey crisp apple tree to plant in her little orchard. She really appreciated it and loved that I remembered that she loved honey crisps. I think wind chimes sound like a lovely idea.

[Tussiemussies]

Think the wind chimes are a really nice idea...

[CathyA]

Thanks Azure and Tussiemussies!

[leslieann]

i love windchimes, Cathy, and love the idea that when you hear them, they can remind you of someone you loved.

[goldensmom]

When my mom died a friend gave me a small spruce tree which I planted and now it is over 10' tall. We now refer to the tree by my mother's first name. I sent a gift certificate to a local nursery to the family in memory of a friend's mother (who lived some distance away) so they could choose whatever living memorial plant/tree they wished.

[Wildflower]

CathyA, I think that's a wonderful idea. I love windchimes myself, and I think that would be a lovely thing to send your friend in remembrance of her Mom.

[Blackdog Lin]

I agree that the windchime idea is a lovely one - assuming she really does love windchimes. I can imagine someone listening to the chiming, and remembering their loved one.

I also adore the idea of a "living" memorial, i.e. something planted. In our yard we have the Joe E Blow Memorial Red Maple tree (red maples were Daddy's favorite), and the Brother Joe memorial rose bush (just something someone sent, but we named it for bro and enjoy it as such), and on the dining room table is Mom's philodendrum; again, something that someone sent, that we remember and associate with Mom's memory.

Me, I'm too pragmatic and practical-thinking. For "distance" funeral offerings, I just send stamps. I think of stamps as something anyone will use in their time of grieving.....

Cathy - you are a good friend to be thinking of what is the perfect and suitable thing to send.....

[iris lily]

Windchimes is a very cool idea if she really does like them.

I won't tell my story again about the memorial rose bush but suffice to say, I did not like getting a rose bush for --was it DH's mother's death? I think so. It was a PITA.

[ToomuchStuff]

Are you going to buy or make the wind chimes? Could you have her mothers name placed on them? (the knocker or on the chimes)

[goldensmom]

Me, I'm too pragmatic and practical-thinking. For "distance" funeral offerings, I just send stamps. I think of stamps as something anyone will use in their time of grieving.....


Stamps, yes. I am a very practical person and when my father died a neighbor gave us a plant and stamps. I thought, how unusual but then when I started to do the thank you notes it was so helpful and I was thankful. That has been 20+ years ago and when ever I see the neighbor I think of the stamps and am thankful all over again. Any acknowledgment that says ‘I thought of you’ and is an on-going remembrance will be appreciated.

[CathyA]

ToomuchStuff.......I know some windchime companies let you engrave something on the sail. I was thinking of doing that, but I'm a little conflicted about that. She didn't have the closest relationship with her mom, and I don't know if she wants something like that on the sail. Initially I thought of having "Thinking of you mom" on it, but now I'm not sure if I should put anything on it.

[decemberlov]

I also love the wind chime idea! Very thoughtful!
When my friends brother passed I gave his mom a journal, a keepsake box, a mug and some tea.
I think it's nice to have something other than flowers.