Regifting. Your thoughts?

[bunnys]

I know that the standard is that regifting is just fine provided the person to whom you regift is not the original gifter of the gift to you.

But I've been paying attention to my ever-increasing pile of gifts to be regifted and I have realized that the vast majority of these gifts I'll never give to anyone else. Why? Because most of them don't apply to anyone I'd want to give a gift to or are such crap to begin with that I'd never feel comfortable pushing any of it off to someone else. Anyone I'd feel deserved the gift isn't on my gift list to begin with.

An example. The other day a coworker/friend gave me a Christmas gift that obviously was badly regifted. Or at least it sure appeared to be a regift. It was just the cheap version of something that people give as a kind of neutral gift to someone they don't really want to give a gift to but feel they have to. Maybe I'm being ungrateful but I generally am of the camp that if it looks like an afterthought, it probably was.

I opened it and thought guess I'll regift this. But I know I won't. It will just be added to the pile.

Today I was doing a little decluttering of my clothing and I have a big box of stuff. I'm going to put all the dust-collecting regifts in the box and give it to Goodwill.

How do others feel about this?

[Mighty Frugal]

Generally, when I receive a gift I know I will never use I ask people I know if they want it and tell them it was a gift from someone-I don't 'regift' but rather 'give away with full disclosure'. Eg a mom I know gave me a bottle of white wine, I only drink red so I'll give the white to my sister who likes white-but I'll tell her where it came from

For kid's gifts I know they won't like I give it to those toy drives they have

[goldensmom]

Back when we had cats, on Christmas morning after we opened presents we would regift our boxes and wadded up wrapping to them. I see nothing wrong with regifting if done tastefully, a gift is a gift and there are no rules as to where the gift orginated.

[pony mom]

I have no problem with regifting if it will suit the receiver. I've received a few gifts that were definitely regifted and they didn't follow my guideline. In some cases I'll tell someone that I received this ...whatever from someone else and thought it would be perfect for them.

I usually don't participate in grab bags because I always end up with something I don't want. However, I enjoy the "bad gift" grab bags, where everyone brings in a bad gift to get rid of. Lots of fun if you do the Yankee Trader version, so if you see something you like, you can claim it. I once reclaimed a gift for a regular grab bag that I brought because I knew I had grabbed lottery tickets; I preferred my own gift.

[HappyHiker]

I wholeheartedly re-gift when suitable as said above. I also buy gently used books through-out the year that are perfect for a friend and lovingly bestow them with a personalized note to friends who are readers...always popular when the title/topic fits them like a glove.

My neighbors, who have just retired, are getting a used book about retirement with a couple on the cover driving in a VW convertible. My neighbors just bought a vintage VW convertible! I had to get it for them.

Another couple who will soon be building an energy-efficient home are getting a great used book on building energy-efficient houses...I think she'll love it!

[Jilly]

I regularly re-gift items that I cannot use and that I know will most likely be interesting or useful to others. Sometimes I share that it was a gift I received, other times not. I expect that the people to whom I give things do the same. That does not bother me a bit. What is not suited to someone else goes almost directly to one of the charity shops. It is not that I am a minimalist, but I aspire to something close to it. Maybe.

I attended a get-together on Monday, gave and received gifts. We have known one another for years, but this time of year brings out the gifter-giver-sharer in us and whilst we do not spend much and try to keep the stuff useful in some way, and most of the women give the same thing to everyone, it really is just all so much stuff. So, most of what I was given has already been passed on to other people, all of it very appropriate for the recipients, and that pleases me. Less stuff here. I did keep some holiday tissues to keep in the car, a nice notepad and a cool cover for my sewing machine. :) Oh, and I always keep alcohol gifts. If I do not like it, guests very well may.

[Simplemind]

I regift and people know I do. I try not to pass along anything that I know wouldn't be a good fit. I regift gift cards etc. If something isn't a good fit for anybody it goes in the yearly garage sale.

[fidgiegirl]

Interesting about the alcohol. We always used to regift wine when it would very rarely come our way, but now I find I can tolerate it again - turns out it never was alcohol that was making me sick, it was the gluten in certain beverages - so now we keep those for exactly the same reasons, to have with our own guests.

I used to keep a supply of gifts on hand like you, bunnys, sometimes regifts, sometimes things I'd picked up on clearance that were cute, but I discontinued the practice. I just found I would go to my "present box" and never have anything I'd want myself, and so I couldn't imagine giving it to someone else. Now once in a great while we will regift (no disclaimer needed, we feel), but we usually just donate, resell or return. We're no longer shy about returning items. We figure the gift giver would rather have us enjoy whatever the gift is than tolerating it in our home. I'm also getting better about donating these things right away rather than hanging onto them for a while.

Kudos for parting with the pile!

[fidgiegirl]

ponymom, we did a white elephant gift exchange for work with a little game and it was a bunch of fun. We laughed our butts off. We are giving away the "gifts," though!

[ToomuchStuff]

Avoid it by asking that they don't give me "gifts". If it does happen, and I know someone who can use it, then it is just a pay it forward/put it in the correct hands thing.
I look at it this way:
I hate surprises (had too many bad ones)
If someone knows me well enough to know what I need/want >8), yeah right, and they are going to "pay it forward" fine. Otherwise, don't surprise me with something that needs to be taken back, or you require me to dispose of for you, etc.

[ctg492]

I regifted almost every gift from associates and neighbors this season. We got several baskets and candy and a few gift cards, I repackaged each one. Nothing wrong with this as they were all very nice quailty gifts. We did not need that much chocolate and cookies!
Now I do not tell people I did this. Last year a friend told me she regifted a gift of food I gave her and it went over great with the person she gave it too. SO good that she wanted to know where I got the gift so she could get more for her friend. Now that was strange to me.

[goldensmom]

. Last year a friend told me she regifted a gift of food I gave her and it went over great with the person she gave it too. SO good that she wanted to know where I got the gift so she could get more for her friend. Now that was strange to me.
I would put that in the 'tacky/untasteful' catagory. I would never tell a gifter that I re-gifted their gift to me no matter what I thought of it, it's just rude and ungrateful.

[catherine]

I would put that in the 'tacky/untasteful' catagory. I would never tell a gifter that I re-gifted their gift to me no matter what I thought of it, it's just rude and ungrateful.

I totally agree!

I rarely regift--I like the "full disclosure" idea, however, and then just passing the gift along to someone else randomly--not for a birthday or Christmas. I also like the White Elephant idea!

One time my brother came for Christmas dinner and gave me a big box of chocolate. After he left, I opened it, and the chocolate was stamped with the name of his local real estate company. I'm sure he didn't know, and DH and I had a good laugh over it.

[fidgiegirl]

One time my mom asked me where her recent gift to me had gone - a Pillsbury Dough Boy cookie jar - and I had immediately sold it on eBay. We were living in a very small house at the time and I was over my one-time Dough Boy interest. I hemmed and hawed and she pressed and pushed and finally I had to tell her I'd gotten rid of it. And then she had to know where! And how much I got for it! And once she heard that I got over $20, she was happy. It was very strange. If I had just given it away, she would have been offended, but since I got money for it, she was fine. Hmmmmmm . . . well, there are a lot of "stuff" dynamics with my mom but that was one of the weirder ones.

[jp1]

Kelli, I wonder if your mom was happy because you got more selling the cookie jar than she paid for it?

[iris lily]

I hate stuff coming to me that I have no interest in and do not want, stuff that comes to me out of the other person's sense of gifting obligation. I find that idea weak and essentially thoughtless, that "I must give a gift."

Now if the "gift" is something that I need/want, I love it and care naught for whence it came. Beside I like "used" things, shop at Goodwill all the time. Just made a trip there yesterday as a matter of fact.

Funny you say that because I just last night opened something for me that had been regifted (I know because the previous owner's name was on the box) but you see, it was PERFECT because it was something that I needed, wanted, and cannot have too many of plus it is a cool version of the practical thing. Ok, it's a wine bottle stopper. Now you would think that I have a lot of them but for some reason I'm down to one truly functional one, I NEED some good wine stoppers.

But mainly I agree with TooMuchStuff (great name for post on this thread eh?) and just discourage gift giving.

[iris lily]

... I have realized that the vast majority of these gifts I'll never give to anyone else. Why? Because most of them don't apply to anyone I'd want to give a gift to or are such crap to begin with that I'd never feel comfortable pushing any of it off to someone else. ...

Yes, These stupid things are a waste of resources and everyone's time, just chuck them into the garbage. Not even worth sending to Goodwill. DH used to keep a little cache of this kind of crap thinking that he would foist them off on someone else until I put my foot down. We all know what they are: faux crystal bowls, packages of old, bad, nuts or chocolates, etc--the kind of things you find in the middle aisles at big box stores this time of year.

This reminds me, my trip to Goodwill yesterday showed that they've got a new method of tagging things. Each price tag also has the day that the item went out on the sales floor. It is cool that I snatched up a few things that had only been out on the floor for 24 or 48 hours.

I won't say, categorically, "don't give them to Goodwill" because I don't speak for Goodwill, but as a regular shopper at the Goodwills around here I bet they see tons of this crap. While it is true that one man's trash is another man's treasure, items in the useless/thoughtless/just-give-'em-something category are what rain on Goodwill each season after the holiday gifting frenzy is over. Consider giving them a break.

[iris lily]

Back when we had cats, on Christmas morning after we opened presents we would regift our boxes and wadded up wrapping to them. I see nothing wrong with regifting if done tastefully, a gift is a gift and there are no rules as to where the gift orginated.

That is cute. :laff:haha.

[sweetana3]

I would never regift supermarket type food. I have given my motherinlaw some specialty products but only because I know when and where produced and thought she would enjoy them. Did not give them to her as gifts although I am a regifter but not of food.

This year the only problematic gift were the Ghiradelli chocolate bars since I really dont need chocolate, only like certain kinds, and husband does not eat it, neither does mom. Luckily they were small ones.

This year we "won" a big basket of foods from Indiana. I "regifted" it to the leasing agent that helped us get the perfect apartment for Mom.

[fidgiegirl]

Kelli, I wonder if your mom was happy because you got more selling the cookie jar than she paid for it?

Could be. She got it at the thrift store.

[fidgiegirl]

I would never regift supermarket type food. I have given my motherinlaw some specialty products but only because I know when and where produced and thought she would enjoy them. Did not give them to her as gifts although I am a regifter but not of food.

This year the only problematic gift were the Ghiradelli chocolate bars since I really dont need chocolate, only like certain kinds, and husband does not eat it, neither does mom. Luckily they were small ones.

This year we "won" a big basket of foods from Indiana. I "regifted" it to the leasing agent that helped us get the perfect apartment for Mom.

Someone recently posted on the forums how when she was little her family had to rely on food shelves and it was a real treat when there was some "treat" food available and that they could pick a little something out. That was something I'd never thought of. Maybe your Ghiradelli chocolates could go there.

Of course, for us for food we do not like, homemade or otherwise, is the table in the workroom at work. Doesn't take more than a few minutes sometimes!

[Tradd]

I've regifted occasionally, not very often. Most of my friends/coworkers know my stance on minimalism. :) Food gifts from non-coworkers I don't like will get taken to work. They will disappear pretty quickly. Heck, even if it's from a coworker I'll put it out for the department to share. "I don't want it to all end up on my hips" is sufficient reason for not eating it myself. Or "I wanted to share." No one in my department will turn down goodies. ;-)

[jp1]

No one in my department will turn down goodies. ;-)

I've never heard of an office where free food was not popular.

In our office the receptionist sends out an email if there's been a lunch meeting or whatever that had a lot of leftovers. I've learned that if I want any of it I need to RUN to wherever the food is the instant I get the email because it will be gone in approximately 3 1/2 minutes.

[Wildflower]

I still remember the year my SIL regifted to my kids the gifts we had given her kids the year before!!>:( She apparently forgot who she had originally gotten the gifts from. We never let on, but we quit exchanging gifts with them as a family after that. Seemed ridiculous at that point to me! She has a whole basement of stuff that she regifts from apparently. She was showing it to us proudly one day right after she had moved into her brand new McMansion. I personally would just give the stuff to charity and be done with it...but I hate having too much stuff and don't have room to store it like she does. Sorry if this sounds judgemental - I don't really mean it to, just sharing.... :)