Stunned

[MamaM]

I know, I shouldn't be but I literally turned in my badge and keys yesterday and the backstabber who had her claws into everyone while I was out on medical leave was name Director today. Um...she only qualifies by default of having worked there 11 years. I am sick to my stomach. It was lie and conspiracy to get rid of me. I am having a hard time foreseeing myself trusting anyone anymore. I know I need to get over but I put my heart and soul into my job and they KNEW they wanted me gone and this is a religious based hospital. Sick I tell you..sick. :sick:

[IshbelRobertson]

Religion. The opiate of the masses.

[redfox]

Oh yikes. Pretty explicit confirmation that this was a poisonous place. And, it is not about you! Even though it has a personal impact, it is not about you. I'd like to predict the future: in 12 months, you will look back and laugh out loud at the absurdity of it all, and thank your lucky stars & good sense that you are out of the mess.

Hugs!

[MamaM]

Thanks..I just feel stupid and naive. I wasted 9 months of my life and gave it my all..and now I have to find another job and put myself and my family through literally hades and try to make sense of even what I want to do. Thanks. :)

[SteveinMN]

Thanks..I just feel stupid and naive. I wasted 9 months of my life [snip]
I would beg to differ. Were there good ways to find out how dysfunctional the place was before you were hired? Would you have felt comfortable engaging in the kind of politics and character assassination (theirs and yours) that takes place there?

You learned a lot about yourself and about the kind of workplace in which you function best. It's a shame it took nine months, but you were paid for the time, you can walk away knowing you did all you could to improve the situation, and you have a much sharper picture of what you need to know before you accept the next job. Maybe it wasn't the way you would choose to spend another nine months of your life, but you can hold your head high in how you behaved through all this. Which is more than they can say.

[lhamo]

I feel your pain, MamaM.

In my case, I had worked at an organization whose mission was completely aligned with mine, but whose management was completely dysfunctional. I thought I was a valued and trusted employee, until they hired someone in over my head to do a job that EVERYONE I worked with knew should have been mine. Someone who had no experience or training in the sector and very minimal language skills. I was supposed to "support" him, but in reality that meant doing all the work so he could sign off on it. Then they tried to cut my salary 20%. I fought it, and won, but immediately began planning my exit.

Yeah, I'm still bitter. But in the end, it turned out to be a great gift from the universe because I escaped a dysfunctional environment that was literally making me sick (physically and mentally), and ended up in a GREAT organization with a boss who is a total mensch and where I get a lot of respect and appreciation for the work I do, which is still pretty interesting and meaningful even if it isn't 100% aligned with what I thought I wanted to do before.

Be glad you only invested 9 months of your life, and focus your energies on using this time to figure out what your next step should be. If this is the thing that showed you that healthcare was not for you, then in a few years time you too may be looking back at this painful period and seeing how it was all worth it in in the end. I hope that happens for you. I think you can make it happen.

Onward and upward!

lhamo

[razz]

Think of what you being paid to learn and use the education on your next job. Burnout will make you feel badly initially but maybe that organization has to go this route to solve its problems and you won't be struggling to work through that mess with them.

Focus on today, on the now and let all the rest of the foolishness go.

I fought tooth and nail for something that I believed in and suffered burnout as well but have no regrets with the decision that I finally made so I do hope that you find the same result.

I suspect that industry insiders will be aware of what is going on so take a needed break and then the right opening will be there for you.

[puglogic]

Think of what you being paid to learn and use the education on your next job.

Agreed here, MamaM, and with the others as well.

I am still using the skills taught to me by a toxic work environment to make a living -- for MYSELF. Talk about the best revenge....

If you had known the place was that poisonous when you went into it, you wouldn't have taken the job. You should be patting yourself on the back for having gotten out of there after only 9 months. Many people spend YEARS in toxic environments because they are afraid to leave.

Let the "Director" be queen of this toxic soup if she wants to. I know it stings, but try to see the truth of the matter.

Hugs,
pug

[creaker]

My first boss for my current job had burnt some bridges getting where he was - and the day came he was under the person he had battled on a few issues with.

He was gone 3 months later - and she moved into his office like it was some sort of trophy. Office politics are really weird. (btw - she was let go not too long after that)

You're probably better off outside a toxic environment like that.

[redfox]

I find that working in an org that is the anti-model is very enlightening. It sure helped me to see quite clearly what I did not want to be in or do, and saved me a lot of grief down the road - as well as being cautionary when I stepped into a power role.

[MamaM]

I am just really confused right now. I don't know what I want or where or who...I am all over the place and I don't like feeling out of control.

[redfox]

I am just really confused right now. I don't know what I want or where or who...I am all over the place and I don't like feeling out of control.

Ummm.... I get this. May I encourage you to just let it be for a bit? You've been upended, and it's disorienting. The illusion of control has been shattered, which is a powerful moment. If this fits, may I suggest that you read this book: Start Where You Are - a Guide to Compassionate Living, by Pema Chodron. And please, this is a very important time to practice self-care.

[MamaM]

Thank you..I will check it out. :)

[SiouzQ.]

+ What everyone said before me! It'll probably take a little bit of time to get over the indignation of it, but you WILL. I left an extremely toxic environment last June and it was such a relief to be DONE with it! My period of confusion lasted over a year at that place trying to figure out what to do with my life because I was afraid to leave and re-enter the job market. I finally had to put a time limit on my exit from that place (job or no job) and the universe lined up in just the right way for me at the right time and I had a new job to go to! Gave two weeks notice and it was the biggest weight off my shoulders!
Let yourself absorb and sort through the feelings, and don't beat yourself up over it. A better situation will come along. How exciting, really!

[MamaM]

Thanks to all of you..it's just really hard to believe anything right now. And of course, I am worried but I am trying to execute a plan to find something I will love.

[iris lily]

I know, I shouldn't be but I literally turned in my badge and keys yesterday and the backstabber who had her claws into everyone while I was out on medical leave was name Director today. Um...she only qualifies by default of having worked there 11 years. I am sick to my stomach. It was lie and conspiracy to get rid of me. I am having a hard time foreseeing myself trusting anyone anymore. I know I need to get over but I put my heart and soul into my job and they KNEW they wanted me gone and this is a religious based hospital. Sick I tell you..sick. :sick:

This is awful. You know, I had some questions about how her getting rid of you gives a leg up on her getting a CEO job, but really, it doesn't matter. You are a rational and sane person on this website so I can only assume your conclusion is correct: rampant craziness there.

I like your avatar, too, and it's a good thing to remember in this situation.

[gimmethesimplelife]

I echo what has been said here, namely be grateful to be out of the cesspool of insanity and stress and stand tall for behaving well and wisely and decently. At least you were in health care so I'm thinking (?) that there will be an appropriate opening for you somewhere. But I agree - give yourself some time to let it go and I bet that in one year you will look back, realize what you have gained/learned from this, and feel strong in yourself and your basic decency. Keep on keeping on and I wish you the best! Rob

[MamaM]

Thanks for trusting I am sane and rational. ;)

Seriously though, I have never experienced this before. On paper, minus the 11 years of working for the company, she does not meet the criteria for the position. No formal education, no ability to lead, no ability to deal with patients, one on one, especially being sensitive to them when rounding on them on the floors, lack of ability to get along with any other leadership other than her cronies...that is just the surface.

She was hostile from the start because she interviewed for the position and didn't get it, I did. And I gave my boss ample opportunity, especially at my 90 day, to make sure I was the right person for the job. He NEVER had a problem with me until I was out on medical issue. No back bone. He didn't even come by my office to say goodbye. This is a CFO, a highly regarded leadership position.

I guess I never really thought someone could be that coniving and vindictive. Just hard to wrap my mind around that.

[iris lily]

Thanks for trusting I am sane and rational. ;)

Seriously though, I have never experienced this before. On paper, minus the 11 years of working for the company, she does not meet the criteria for the position. No formal education, no ability to lead, no ability to deal with patients, one on one, especially being sensitive to them when rounding on them on the floors, lack of ability to get along with any other leadership other than her cronies...that is just the surface.

She was hostile from the start because she interviewed for the position and didn't get it, I did. And I gave my boss ample opportunity, especially at my 90 day, to make sure I was the right person for the job. He NEVER had a problem with me until I was out on medical issue. No back bone. He didn't even come by my office to say goodbye. This is a CFO, a highly regarded leadership position.

I guess I never really thought someone could be that coniving and vindictive. Just hard to wrap my mind around that.

So that I'm clear, she got YOUR job?

[MamaM]

Yes Ma'am...my seat wasn't even cold yet.

[redfox]

That gutless CFO will get exactly what he deserves with her. Too bad patients will suffer.

You have no control over any of this... I hope you can take a week of down time, or more, to let your system recalibrate, and practice dropping the story lines you're running in your head over & over... Your mental health is waaay more valuable than sussing out that mess.