When you're made to feel stupid for asking questions

[Tradd]

I think many of you are aware of my ongoing work saga. My manager is now former manager. Got a big promotion. Anyway, there's an interim. Person is corporate officer in charge of customs stuff. Anyway, she put out some directives via email tonight on how she wants certain things done, adding we're to ask any questions we have. Some things in the directives were vague or not mentioned at all. One directive told us to do something at a certain point in our processes. That is dependent on information we have not been able to reliably get until much later. We've been fighting for years to get this info earlier (it has to come from foreign shipper), to little avail.

Anyhow, I ask a few questions on the things not mentioned or vague in directives. I know my coworkers will have these questions as well, and will come to me for clarification. The comments that come back from interim manager basically call me stupid for asking questions. Great. Just great.

I come from the position that it's much better to ask even simple, stupid seeming things, as it's the obvious things that often get overlooked and cause trouble later, in my experience.

[sweetana3]

Oh, Tradd I feel for you. This is the position I was in at my final job before retirement. At one point, my manager and I were almost in a shouting match because she told me I was stupid and had already received the information in an email from her. I already carefully checked all sources for an answer before asking her (due to her previously shown temper) and had no such email. I left her office in a huff and later she called out (not willing to face me) and said she had not sent the email to me.

Needless to say our whole relationship suffered. I was her personal management assistant.

Usually they mean you are ok to ask questions until they dont know the answer. A good manager will clarify with you or go find out what the answer is. A bad one ignores the question or sends it back with no answer.

[goldensmom]

I would try everything to find the answer to a question before going to a particular supervisor because of his demeaning behavior. His answer to my every question was 'don't you have a manual? Look it up'. Which really meant that he didn't know the answer and was unwilling to find one. I didn't feel stupid, I was frustrated and thought him stupid as did his other employees. My next supervisor was just the opposite. If he did not know the answer to a question he would not give up until he found the answer. He was very much respected by his employees

[Tradd]

Goldensmom, I normally would do that. However, these changes in procedure came from the person sending the email. There simply was no one else to ask.

[MamaM]

Keep the email. When things hit the fan, you can proved you asked and were not clear. I am sorry you are going through this. Often, when you ask questions and people are passive aggressive, it means they are intimidated by your smarts.

[CaseyMiller]

I recommend giving the person the benefit of the doubt initially. It is so easy to misinterpret the tone/intent on an email. To mitigate future such replies, I would also recommend a call to the person with a casual comment about the tone of the reply. If they get snarky on the phone, then you'll know for sure the person is an idiot and will be able to deal with it accordingly.

[iris lily]

Tradd, you may have a manager who is unable to say: I don't know.

I say that a lot any more. the work my department does is specific with steps A B C. In the early days when I was a supervisor I thought that I should have the entire process laid out and if anyone had a question, it was mine to solve. Now I don't think that, necessarily. In any process I define the points that MUST be done. The other, in-between issues are up to the individual employee.

I might say : "I don't know" and

* I'll get back to you with that because I'm currently researching how to do that
* the choices you make are fine until we clarify that step in the process
* how you do that part is up to you--and then we talk about a couple of options

But a supervisor being able to say I Don't Know is important.

[chrisgermany]

Just my interpretation:
I suppose this person has learned about your achievements and how good the GM talks about you.
So she feels challenged. But she is your manager.
Now she tries to prove that you do not know a thing to push you back in line.

Very dangerous. Document a lot.

[Gardenarian]

Tradd, you may have a manager who is unable to say: I don't know.

+1