View Full Version : If a Detective Walked into Your House / Apartment...
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 2:00pm
What is the first thing they would say? :confused:
If they got to my bedroom they would say, "Why does she have all that put-it-together-yourself furniture?" :laff:
This is triggered by Domestic Goddess' comment in a previous thread: "What I really want to know is how people workiing minimum wage jobs always have really nice apartments filled with obviously expensive furniture?"
{also, thanks, Amaranth, for the real life detective links} :+1:
"Looks like we're going to have to pull-out all the stops on this one, because we're not going to find any DNA on the floors in this house"! ROTFLMAO!
What is the first thing they would say? :confused:
"Does your dog bite?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXn2QVipK2o
Where's your Green Card? or... Don't you have a job?? (I work from home, and yes, I am a medical cannabis user without the bogus "Green Card" that BS 'medical' operators in WA & CA issue for a hefty fee. I have a libertarian streak - do not tell Bae!)
This must be just a fake home used as a decoy because no one could live with so few things. Not exactly a bare room with only a phone in it but close! Well at least when I lived alone.
"Wow! Old hippies from the 70's."
This must be just a fake home used as a decoy because no one could live with so few things. Not exactly a bare room with only a phone in it but close! Well at least when I lived alone.
"Wow! Old hippies from the 70's."
Perfect.
Must be luddites. No smart phones, no streaming video, no DVR, and only one small TV? How do they live ?
Blackdog Lin
3-8-13, 8:14pm
Detective walks in and sniffs. Looks at sliding-glass door. Runs gloved hand across (any) piece of furniture, then looks down at their pants leg and starts brushing with their hand. And declares:
"Where's the dog?"
Well, considering I never answer the doorbell unless I'm informed ahead of time someone is stopping by they would walk away thinking no one was home :)
"They were obviously looking for something. They've ransacked the place."
Is this a grow-op or what?
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 9:38pm
"Looks like we're going to have to pull-out all the stops on this one, because we're not going to find any DNA on the floors in this house"! ROTFLMAO!
Mrs M - Are your floors really that spotless? You are the one to call for clean-up after any crime? ;)
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 9:39pm
BAE - Funny! :laff:
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 9:41pm
This must be just a fake home used as a decoy because no one could live with so few things. Not exactly a bare room with only a phone in it but close! Well at least when I lived alone.
Spartana - Decoy home!! :laff:
I am getting really good visuals of everyone's home on here ;)
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 9:42pm
"Wow! Old hippies from the 70's."
Let's see... macrame wall hangings and tie-dyed shirts? :)
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 9:44pm
Detective walks in and sniffs. Looks at sliding-glass door. Runs gloved hand across (any) piece of furniture, then looks down at their pants leg and starts brushing with their hand. And declares:
"Where's the dog?"
You have a shedder on your hands? ;)
Life_is_Simple
3-8-13, 9:46pm
"They were obviously looking for something. They've ransacked the place."
:laff:
Sometimes I worry about decluttering too much, making it too easy for thieves to find things ;) A little clutter might be a good thing ;)
Mrs M - Are your floors really that spotless? You are the one to call for clean-up after any crime? ;)LOL! Yes... they really truly are.
I wish a detective would walk into my house - maybe he could find my watch and my memory stick...
Blackdog Lin
3-8-13, 11:07pm
Life_is_Simple: yep. Research Schipperke's. (they're awesome dogs.) We have a schipperke mutt, but she holds to all of the breed's imperatives, one of which is shedding like mad.
What we live with: (1) schipperke's shed like crazy; and (2) they are loveable goofballs. On a day-to-day basis, I endure the shedding, and adore the loveable goofball.
Maxamillion
3-9-13, 4:03am
*looking at all the dust* "It's been awhile since anyone has been here." >8)
domestic goddess
3-9-13, 9:59am
I hate to admit this, but, "What exploded in here?"
Honestly, I"m trying to keep up with the work, but I don't seem to be able to do it.
Or, (my preference): "It sure smells good in here" (when I've been baking)
I wish a detective would walk into my house - maybe he could find my watch and my memory stick...
A lost memory stick... that phrase has hit my funny bone today -- and I could use some humor right now!
This whole thread is making me laugh.
Spartana - Decoy home!! :laff:
I am getting really good visuals of everyone's home on here ;)
Well the funny thing is that my family (and friends) would often say that I am the only one they know where robbers, if they broke into my house to rob me, would feel so bad for me that they would actually leave things instead of take anything :-)!
jennipurrr
3-12-13, 10:35pm
I used to say that if thieves broke into my house they would be sorely disappointed. We had one old tube TV and an oldish PC, no game systems, no fancy jewelry. Recently DH acquired a free almost working condition (can't be on for hours or it gets a black stripe down it) flat screen, I guess they can steal that but they better limit their screen time lest it get finicky.
In contrast to Mrs M's home, a detective would probably be frustrated with all the DNA contamination by various animals. I do my best to keep clean, but with 2 cats and 3 dogs a home is only a certain level of clean.
Speaking of nice furniture...DH bought a cheapy looking bedroom set a year before I met him in college with his student loan money. We did replace the mattress because it was in dire need, but I told him until the balance is zero we are keeping that furniture. The set is about 12 years old now...since the student loans have 30,000 still (down from 90,000 originally!) and he is just paying the minimum payment (1.5% interest rate) I may give in at some point. Hopefully not though!
BayouGirl
3-12-13, 11:04pm
It is not their thoughts on my house that I would be worried with. I fear that what they would see on my computer would astound them and and convince them that I was some kinda of sicko or budding psychopath. See, I belong to an online group of avid crime sleuths and the details of the cases and investigating them leads us to some pretty scary websites, not to mention that we also look up definitions of gory acts and details and even peruse some pretty sick websites in order to track down the facts.
So my computer history would definitely cause them to look at me quite strangely.
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