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Zoe Girl
8-28-13, 11:36pm
Hey this is not about my own kids! Yeah! This is a share out, maybe share how rough some kids can be.

I work with kids, more supervisory of front line staff. So I get to do some fun things, set the overall plan, and deal with behavior. A lot. Generally I am known as the one with the most patience and sometimes I actually see something great happen! So it was the 3rd day of school today, that means 6 sessions of our program (before and after school) and I suspended a kid for aggressive acts. I am actually feeling better than I thought I would, I had to leave early and fill out everything for the grandma picking up, but we talked yesterday and wrote a behavior plan. I told both child and grandma I was very concerned about how fast this had happened and I would put the needs of all the kids in the program before this child. I had a one-on-two staff for summer camp to work with him and one other child. The other child has special needs and aggression. Right now she has not been able to attend our program because I cannot find a qualified person to work one-on-one with her. Funny thing is the behavior kiddo and the special needs kiddo bonded at the end of summer camp. The special needs kiddo does not play with or form bonds with other children, her attempts at bonding become aggressive, but the behavior kiddo would actually talk to her. At our zoo field trip he was so kind about our group of 3 needing to walk slow and accommodate her. I wish I could take her but the bruises my staff got are not okay. Did you know that special education teachers can wear kevlar sleeves to protect from pinching? We all love her, she can be so sweet, but this is a rough kid.

So the super big high five win in all of this was a kiddo I will call A. Last year I suspended him 4 times I think. Unprovoked aggressive acts is pretty much why you get suspended. Each time he came back improved so I just kept working with him. Mom was super supportive. So the final straw with D (behavior kiddo) was him jumping A over a ball conflict. Last year we would have had a brawl with these kids. But A described to me how he pushed on his shoulders and rolled over and over until he was able to break free and then, drum roll, he walked away. Last year he was the one jumping other kids and saying it was their fault. He punched kids for standing too close. The rules are that I have 3 write-ups, suspension and then expulsion. I didn't do it, I kept suspending and coming back strict. I got grief from some of my staff. Now I have the evidence it CAN work.

That is one out of 4 very serious kiddos who is doing much better. The other went to a mental health day facility for school eventually.

fidgiegirl
8-29-13, 9:28am
Uff, I don't envy you dealing with this but outside of the regular school day where supports can be legally enforced and there's a lot more $$. Keep up the good work, you might be the shining light for some of these children.

Jilly
8-29-13, 11:39pm
Uff, I don't envy you dealing with this but outside of the regular school day where supports can be legally enforced and there's a lot more $$. Keep up the good work, you might be the shining light for some of these children.

That sounds very much like a given, from my perspective. Most of my clients (all adults) carry some measure of challenge, and whilst there is the occasional verbal issue, so far no one has physically attacked me, and despite the desire of some, more experienced, regular staff to fire some of them, sometimes you just have to go with your instincts and give someone extra chances.

Even so, good to know about the Kevlar sleeves.:~)

Zoe Girl
8-30-13, 7:38am
we will see how shining light I am, my staff said that grandma was pretty darn furious and we meet this morning. I couldn't do a courtesy call because it was one of the only times I could not be available. But maybe that is good, my staff did well with it after we struggled horribly last year. I am working on how to explain the suspension as a positive tool, he is at a new school and wants to make new friends but they will learn fast that he is scary and not be his friend. So he needs to get this quick, or I can put him on hold until I get the extra person hired and he will be in a class of 2. The one thing that is not going to happen is continual hurting others and coming back every day.