Decluttering Regrets

[ejchase]

I read this, and it kind of brought up all my fears about decluttering. On the other hand, I wonder if the loss she describes is just the inevitable loss of the past that we can't control but just project onto objects.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/10446922/Decluttering-can-end-up-costing-you-in-the-long-run.html

Your thoughts?

It seems like a lot of the things she misses are replaceable like old books and CDs.

The only decluttering regret I have is a v-neck chocolate brown Henley shirt that I loved. I have no idea why I got rid of it. But you know, life goes on. I have other clothes I love now.

I think I'd rather miss a few old objects I got rid of than live in a house full of junk.

[catherine]

Interesting article.

I agree--I think we all believe in the Pareto Principle when it comes to our stuff: 80% of the time we only use 20% of our stuff. So we feel that we should purge the 80% of stuff. Then there's that odd occasion when we find out that we could have used this or that.

I agree that when she talked about getting rid of her CDs, I was thinking, you should have downloaded them before you got rid of them. I kind of identified when she said that she got rid of her rock T-shirts. I have kept all my kids' T-shirts that marked their growth--soccer shirts, and gradutation T-shirts with their names on the back and punk rock shirts and and the shirts that seemed to have become a second skin because they wore them so often. I've thought maybe someday I'll make each of them a quilt of these T-shirts--that would be kind of neat, but I know that will NEVER happen.

It is a very fine balancing act, deciding what to keep and what to purge, that's for sure. I tend to err on the side of keeping stuff simply because it's easier to decide you don't need something that decide you'd wished you'd kept it. And we do have the space for the stuff we have now, and I only hope that as our kids settle into homes of their own, I'll make them take and store their own shi.. stuff.

[JaneV2.0]

I just decluttered an extra coffee carafe. Then I discovered the one I was using was cracked. So I got my spare down from the cupboard and discovered it was the wrong size for my coffee maker. D'oh!:doh: Back to the thrift store. In the meantime, it's cold-brewed for me.

[kib]

Blankets. I couldn't see for the fortress of unappealing microfiber blankets surrounding us, but last night I discovered that too many definitely is better than too few - did I really get rid of All the winter blankets?? :confused:

[razz]

The article is written by someone at a much earlier stage in her life so that impacts a lot of decisions.

My decluttering is based on the consideration that I will move into a smaller space in about 3 years.

I wish so hard that DH had decluttered some of his stuff and machinery so that I would not now be struggling with the mess of multiples of almost everything. I don't want to leave such a mess for my kids to sort through and have promised them that I will get it all reduced to a manageable amount giving them first choice of anything that I don't need.

What does one do with about 15 filled photo albums, bins of yarn and fabric and the usual UFO's, cases of canning jars that used to be filled each year, etc. I finally got rid of the slide projector and all the slides on dental concerns that I used for educating staff, plus a lot of the material for horticultural education from my Master Gardener time...

A lot of stuff is more a type of evidence of a life well-lived and enjoyed at the time. However, the present is filled with so much that is new, positive and different that I cannot see hanging onto stuff from the past or regrets.

[JaneV2.0]

Blankets. I couldn't see for the fortress of unappealing microfiber blankets surrounding us, but last night I discovered that too many definitely is better than too few - did I really get rid of All the winter blankets?? :confused:

Where did you find "unappealing microfiber blankets?" Mine are so appealing they're the only non-natural-fiber blankets I own. Fluffy, lightweight--and such pretty colors! Among other things, I'll never face a blanket shortage!:)

[ejchase]

The article is written by someone at a much earlier stage in her life so that impacts a lot of decisions.

A lot of stuff is more a type of evidence of a life well-lived and enjoyed at the time. However, the present is filled with so much that is new, positive and different that I cannot see hanging onto stuff from the past or regrets.

I think this is, ultimately, my feeling about the article I posted. I was single and childless for twenty years of my adult life, and I have a lot of good memories from that time, but I don't think I need to hold on to old t-shirts and books to remind me. There are great t-shirts, books, and people and experiences (like motherhood and long-term partnership!) coming into my life right now, and if I am hoarding all that other stuff, it's harder for me to embrace the present.

[kib]

Somehow I wound up with about fifteen beige microfiber throw blankets, ripe for the throwing. I'm currently managing multiple properties and I think the rest of the blankets must have migrated elsewhere, I can't imagine I actually got rid of either the wools or the two big fluffy micros. But last night, beige throws would have definitely been preferable to taking an actual slightly camel-smelling camel blanket off the wall, which is what we wound up with. Bedouins' beguine.

[JaneV2.0]

Oh. Well, then. My only beige blanket is a warm but pilly wool one that's not going anywhere. Camel sweat: snort!

[SteveinMN]

I think the writer of the article is a little too easily led and perhaps has what I call a "binary" personality: things are or they aren't. There is no in-between. Did she really buy furniture at IKEA because they told her to? Could she have kept some of her favorite CDs rather than dumping them for cheap?

Looking back, I wish we'd never sold our first house. It appreciated a lot and is in a high-demand area around here. But the prospect of moving from a townhouse to a house with a real yard and more bedrooms for prospective kids outweighed staying there at the time. Hindsight is always 20/20. And you can't move too far forward if you're always looking back.

[JaneV2.0]

I have mixed feelings about my first place, too. If I'd kept it, I'd likely have a bundle in the bank, and it was a far more livable, efficient layout than my current house. I'd be closer to friends and family. and I wouldn't have a bittersweet attachment to this little corner of paradise.

[fidgiegirl]

I've thought maybe someday I'll make each of them a quilt of these T-shirts--that would be kind of neat, but I know that will NEVER happen.

People can make those for you on Etsy . . . (http://www.etsy.com/listing/108628758/made-to-order-custom-t-shirt-blanket?ref=sr_gallery_2&sref=sr_2760e5a63931d431aa9d91dea35087cade74dbbfbe 7c0d9f9bec9fac9f4acf11_1385237667_14290899_quilt&ga_search_query=t-shirt+quilt&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=US&ga_search_type=all)this was just one of the many listings available.

[leslieann]

I had one of those Diane von Furstenburg wrap dresses, too, just as the author did but it would have looked incredibly dated any time after the seventies when I wore it. I think she was indulging in nostalgia and maybe needed to find a way to be just off a popular topic in order to get read....I wasn't actually convinced that she was suffering too much from decluttering. But maybe I'm just not very sympathetic.

[leslieann]

When I opened the thread, I hoped it was about decluttering one's regrets...or some way to get rid of regretful thinking that clutters up one's internal space....any hope of that???

[catherine]

I had one of those Diane von Furstenburg wrap dresses, too, just as the author did but it would have looked incredibly dated any time after the seventies when I wore it. I think she was indulging in nostalgia and maybe needed to find a way to be just off a popular topic in order to get read....I wasn't actually convinced that she was suffering too much from decluttering. But maybe I'm just not very sympathetic.

Yes--I had a blue and white one. I didn't buy it--DH bought it for me when we were dating. I couldn't afford it. (He couldn't afford it, either, but that never stopped him from buying anything.) I remember freaking out when I spilled soy sauce on it.

[ejchase]

When I opened the thread, I hoped it was about decluttering one's regrets...or some way to get rid of regretful thinking that clutters up one's internal space....any hope of that???

Sounds great - probably best to start a new thread so people can find it!

[Greg44]

My only decluttering regret - is that I don't have time to do more. Have worked 600+ hours of overtime this year
(yes I am salaried). I see so much I would like to go though and get rid of, stuff my wife even said she would like to get rid of! Hopefully will get more time off in the next 6 weeks to make some serious advances!

[happystuff]

Anything I've gotten rid of and then discovered I needed/wanted back (and it's only been 1 item in the last 10 years so far)... I've been lucky enough to find again on ebay, Amazon, the thrift store or... well, from somewhere.