Confession Time...

[jschmidt]

This isn't just a post for confession, but also for an emotional dumping of what has been going on lately. After being mega stressed from work a few years ago, I have "coasted" for the past year and a half. It has been great, and doable because of no debt, and semi-frugal living. Not anything compared to many of you, but we get by at around $3,000 a month for a family of 3. I think that is fairly frugal living. I am known as the resident cheapskate in our circle of friends.

A few months ago, we hit the big $200k mark in savings (yeah!!!) Since then, however (this month especially) I feel like we have been on a spending BINGE and it is driving me nuts. Here is what we have bought:

$9,000+ worth of collectible merchandise - most of which will be sold throughout this year, which will give us around $3,000 profit. Not crazy profitable, but a fun way to stay in the hobby I enjoy, and make a little extra scratch.

$400 on an impromptu trip out of town as a mini vacation for my family

$400 a tablet and gaming controller (gifts for me!)

$1,000 for a projector and 3d glasses (gifts for my family)

$500 on miscellaneous things like gifts, etc.

I'm sure there is more, too. I don't ever really do this kind of thing, so it is driving me a little batty. I will say this though - the projector/3d glasses, game controller and tablet is something I don't think I could be more excited about. We have an OLD boxy tv that people have made fun of us for having for years. My wife has been wanting one for a long time, but I could never see myself spending that kind of money, and I figured that Christmas time would be as good as any. Conversely, since I know I'm getting some really cool things for Christmas, this is the first time in years and years that I'm excited about Christmas day :) I never ask for anything, because we are just so incredibly blessed as it is. But unfortunately, each time Christmas comes, when I don't get anything, I feel let down inside. It is my fault for not asking for anything, but this year is different ... can't wait!

Part of me feels like we are going main stream in doing all this though, too. The last thing I want to be is stupid with our money, so I'm trying hard to enjoy all this without the anxiety part ... but I don't want to slip into enjoying it so much that this becomes a routine.

Anyway, so that is my confession. I cringe a little bit (not as much anymore) every time I hear that we purchased something like a $15 pair of christmas reindeer antlers for our car, or $15 for bones for the dog, or $20 for a shirt for a party ... it drives me nuts and has been happening a lot this past month.

[Teacher Terry]

I think 3,000/month for 3 people is frugal living. It seems like you have spent the most $ on things you will sell & make a profit so not such a big deal. Sometimes we have to buy things that will bring us enjoyment. WE limped along with a TV that the sound went up & down, lines running thru & would disappear etc for 2 years. One day I said that is it-I am getting a new TV. I researched and got a good deal but had it with the problem one. I also think experiences like a trip are worthwhile & it did not cost a lot. I think it is fine as long as it does not become a new way of life:~)

[JaneV2.0]

I don't know about any of the other stuff, but $15 for dog bones is money well spent.

It's fun to be able to wait with happy anticipation for Christmas again. You can batten down the financial hatches after the New Year.

[SteveinMN]

December has not been a frugal month for us, either, though in addition to Christmahanukwanzaakah we celebrate four birthdays during the month.

I look at it as money we're spending -- for the very most part -- consciously. The grocery bill is a little higher for holiday treats we're sharing with family and friends; we are exchanging modest gifts with people we care about; there are some non-profit organizations we support this month (to varying degrees depending on budget); ... It's not all mindless spending. Nor is it geared to impressing other folks or cutting loose after 11 months of spending carefully. It's also money we know we spend (at some level) every December. So I think we tend to consider that in "budgeting" during the other months of the year.

I believe we very often tend to conflate frugality with simplicity and we tend to internalize the idea that spending money on anything but bare necessities is optional. Sometimes simplicity is anything but frugal. And I prefer to think the idea of living simply is to put the most important things in life way up front, be it time spent with the family watching movies, or spending money on food and travel to visit and celebrate with people because they can disappear in a blink of an eye. No "confession" needed for me.

[jschmidt]

SteveinMN - that is some great insight. Perhaps I should adopt some of your views in that way as well! Thanks for posting.