View Full Version : If only I had been this frugal across the board
Well, continuing the DS/DDIL living with us saga, I have converted my DD's bedroom into an upstairs TV room, so that they have a little more room to themselves. Since we only have one TV in the house, we had to get another one.
We decided to actually upgrade our downstairs TV, and give them our current one--a 32" flat screen which actually the TV DS gave to us last year--he had gotten it for free from a friend who was moving, and he wanted to help us out in the TV department since we were, at the time, using an ancient big tube TV that was perched on a piano bench.
So, we've been researching and debating pros and cons of different features. We definitely did not want to spend $500 for a TV.
But then we got to thinking: we spent well under $100 for a *black-and-white* TV when we got married. No one had B&W tv's back then, but you could still buy them. We didn't want to spend the money on a color one, when we felt black and white served the purpose.
MIL felt sorry for us and felt we should have a better TV so she bought us our first color TV years later.
When that one went, DH got a really good deal on a floor model when he was working as a seasonal electronics salesman in Macy's. I think it was $90. That was about 15 years ago.
That one finally went two years ago, and that's when DH dragged out one of his old TV monitors that he uses for his video production business. It was an ugly monster, but it was fine with us, and that's when DS let us have his friend's old TV.
Bottom line: in 37 years of marriage, we have paid probably under $300 for TVs. Until about two hours ago when we paid $369 for a 39" Toshiba, so that brings it still under $700. That's $18.90 a year. Not bad. Similar to our refrigerator-buying habits--$50 for our first one, $75 for our second, and then two years ago we splurged and bought a floor model in Lowe's for $679.
The real bottom line: I really, really wish we had been frugal in every area of our lives to the same degree. While we really didn't have much money at all for a long time, DH is a really big entertainment spender. My non-frugals are family vacations, impulses to help family members out, Christmas gifts, and inattention to general "leaks" in the budget.
What are your frugal inconsistencies? Where do you HATE to spend money, and where does money seem to flow too quickly out the door?
I have a hard time spending money on clothes. I'm happy to receive it as a gift, and -- at least until recently -- I was fine with checking out the racks at thrift stores. If I need something (like daily-wear shoes several years back), I'll spend for U.S.-made items, but it's gotta last me a while.
I still check out thrift stores if I happen to need something and happen to be near one. But a few years ago I just kind of quit them -- too much cr@p. Time was I had little trouble finding shirts in my size that still had the pins and cardboard in them, not a mark. Now so much of it is very much out of style, some of it is stained or worn, ... It's just not a productive use of my time anymore.
We used to be big spenders on eating out. That stopped when I retired and started cooking at home. But even with the two of us not eating steak and fancy seafood and convenience foods, it seems I spend a lot of time in grocery stores and it's one of our bigger monthly budget items. I'd be much more frugal about it if I didn't care about eating. :~)
Other than my now grown adult children and 2 cats, I have a hard time spending money on anything. And I am very frugal when it comes to even them.... Of course, my income has dropped tremendously in the past couple years and I am fully responsible for myself financially after the divorce, and now living on SS disability only due to my MS complicates money matters even more.
rodeosweetheart
1-24-14, 7:08am
My biggest spending categories are taking care of family and friends, not finding one place to live and sticking with it (so moving and buying houses, albeit very cheap houses), and education. Two years have spent over 10% of income going to funerals and 1 very expensive wedding of friends, for example.
I did the ROI calculation on our last fridge - a 1994 model... I could not justify purchasing a new one at $1000+ when the old one still worked... Well, two times she let me down - items spoiled. (the first time I thought it was the food, not the fridge). I then realized I stood to lose $1000 in stored food if it really died, so last year spent big money on a new fridge. I got a top of the line french door with ice and water from a local small business at about a 50% discount . As much as I love this new fridge, and it saves us money in electricity (so they say) and bottled water since we drink the filtered water while at home, the ten year cost is still high, IMHO. I don't expect a fridge to live much beyond that these days. I am a cynic and believe in planned obsolescence.
I bought a new washer / dryer set last year too.... now that is really a cost saver. I only do about three loads a week as opposed to 10 - 12 with the old machines. It saves in electric and water. I won't look back from that purchase...
My parents always bought the next lower from top of the line... something about getting what you pay for - and expecting good quality for good money... Now, with all the comparison apps available, web searches with reviews, consumer reporting, etc - I am not afraid to spend little money to get good quality.
I hate to spend money on my house or yard. Whenever I have to do a home or yard project to maintain the old place I have an inner rant about how THAT is not what I want to spend my money (or time) on. I don't want to buy gopher killer, fertilizer and grass seed and use extra water to maintain the yard. I don't want to have to buy a new screen or replace the light fixtures or buy paint or a new roof or water heater or whatever. I want to use that money for a trip or something fun! I really, really really begrudge having to spend any money (and my even more valuable time) on that kind of thing. I get practically weepy even thinking about it. Time to get an apt or condo I guess :-)!
On the other hand I have no problem spending money on budget travel and fun stuff. As long as I stay within budget then I am OK with that. It's when I have to use the money budgeted for fun to fix the leaky sink that I get upset. I also don't like buying decorating things for my house or doing upgrades just for beautification. Hate to buy appliances too or entertainment things like a computer or TV.
We have two woodstoves that don't keep smoke out of the house like they should--I can't be around when either is being used. Those were big expenses--we got them because they have windows through which you can watch the fire. We should have gotten the most energy-efficient ones instead. Or better yet, realized how polluting they are--someone years ago, maybe Spartana, pointed that out to me here.
OTOH, we now put about $3,000 a month into savings/emergency fund now that DH lost his job. He is 70 and not real full of energy and am not in good enough health to take on new work, so this is it for us. Of course I wish we had been saving all our lives.
My biggest stress is our mortgage--owing money just about give me hives. There is probably no way we can pay off our mortgage ever, but in my dreams that's what we're saving for, to stop paying that $804/month. I believe I would feel a lot more secure without that debt, even though there are many other things to feel insecure about.
Teacher Terry
1-25-14, 3:34pm
I hate to spend $ on cars. It seems like such a waste yet if you want to take car trips you must have a reliable car. My 14 yo Volvo just died & I had to buy another car. Ended up with a 2010 Honda Accord that hopefully I will be able to drive for the next 15 years. Although, I got a good deal it still was hard. We plan to take a driving trip this summer with our 3 small dogs. I know people who buy cars every 5 years or so. On Mr MM Forum people are always telling others to sell their cars and buy a junker which is fine depending on where you live, work etc but you can overspend on car repairs which is not frugal either. We really did that with my Volvo because I was determined that is was going to last a long time, etc. I thought about adding up what i spent on car repairs last 6 years but changed my mind-it would be depressing. I don't mind spending $ on my home to make it nicer since I spend a lot of time there. The trips I have taken have also been well worth the $.
On Mr MM Forum people are always telling others to sell their cars and buy a junker which is fine depending on where you live, work etc but you can overspend on car repairs which is not frugal either.
One reason I've never really gotten into the MMM forums is because the "conventional wisdom" there often seems to minimize or even ignore that not everyone has even a modicum of technical ability or interest in a particular subject Speaking specifically of cars, many people are uncomfortable with running on the edge of being stranded by their car -- at odd hours, or on less-traveled roads, or with no one to call and pick them up and/or fix the car, and even losing money because they're not getting to their work. For some people, peace of mind in transportation is worth money even if it cannot be quantified and even if, in retrospect, it seems like money wasted.
ApatheticNoMore
1-26-14, 1:06am
If I was just using a car for car trips, I'd just rent a car, saves putting mileage on the car as well. But a reliable car for daily commuting and the like yea. There comes a point to get rid of the junker but I don't believe well built and maintained cars that haven't been in major accidents automatically "go bad" at 100k miles or something. However I once had a car that got salvaged in a major accident (rear ended) - THAT was not worth fixing the way I did.
One reason I've never really gotten into the MMM forums is because the "conventional wisdom" there often seems to minimize or even ignore that not everyone has even a modicum of technical ability or interest in a particular subject Speaking specifically of cars, many people are uncomfortable with running on the edge of being stranded by their car -- at odd hours, or on less-traveled roads, or with no one to call and pick them up and/or fix the car, and even losing money because they're not getting to their work. For some people, peace of mind in transportation is worth money even if it cannot be quantified and even if, in retrospect, it seems like money wasted.
That is my philosophy, too, Steve. There's a safety aspect here as well, if you're a single female usually driving alone.
ApatheticNoMore
1-26-14, 3:06pm
Guess I figure there is no reason to consider a car unreliable unless it's actually becoming unreliable not just because it's x years old or has x thousand mileage on it and occasionally needs minor repairs - and btw depending on where you go even these minor repairs can be *EXPENSIVE* - I could have just put over $1000, so that's a major NON FRUGAL (and yea I'm like $1000 in a ten year old car!), if I got every repair they recommended (some I can postpone and take it elsewhere cheaper) and this for a car that has never once had anything wrong that I noticed and never had anything major needing repair. It's just when you take it to the mechanic for maintenance it's like going to the doctor, you're perfectly fine and by the time you leave they're pushing 10 prescriptions on you or something (I do regret not going to the honest to a fault mechanic).
Teacher Terry
1-26-14, 8:00pm
I have a great mechanic who said get a newer car because although I love taking your money I don't feel right about it. Once my car is out of warranty we will return to him. Also I did not want a car payment but we have one for a few years. Although our home is paid for we could not pay cash for the car. Both DR & Mr. MM say I can't afford it then but we are 60 & have the $ to see family & friends this summer & I feel like there are times when we need to do what we want to do if we can afford it versus waiting till the car has been paid off. I have learned the hard way that life can be short for even young people.
If I was just using a car for car trips, I'd just rent a car, saves putting mileage on the car as well. . I also hate putting more money into my already old truck (2001 Ford Ranger) so renting is what I usually do now - even if it's for a month or more (I have a CC that covers a month of the damage collision wavier so don't have to buy all that extra insurance coverage and always get rental cars with unlimited mileage). My truck has a lot of mileage on it and is a gas guzzler (big V-6 extra cab with a shell and racks), so renting a newer compact car actually saves me a lot of money on both fuel as well as having to do more repairs and maintenance on my old truck. Around town I ride my bike or just drive short distances (maybe 20 miles or so) so rarely need to do much of the expensive maintenance on my truck I'd have to do if I drove it a lot or took it on long road trips. For instance this fall I rented a couple of different vehicle (well 4 in total) over a 3 month time period to go on long trips. The total cost for the rentals was $1200 for 3 months. I put some serious miles on the cars and probably saved more than $1200 in fuel costs alone by not driving my truck - not even counting the potential repair costs if my truck had (likely) broke down! And it was nice to have a safe car that I knew wouldn't leave me stranded on some back woods road.
We do buy older cars because Zach can fix them. I don't think I have ever bought a TV. I just take what people are getting rid of. We did splurge with some Christmas money from my mom and buy a projector and movie screen for movie nights, but technically, that was a gift. We just decided what to use it on.
We spend money on home upgrades and repairs (nothing super fancy. We replaced the pink paneling and built a closet in the family room, replaced the old rotting deck, put in adequate lighting, finished the basement, put in an egress window, replaced the roof. We are hoping to do new flooring and patio doors this year) but we don't have a mortgage payment, so it kind of balances out. We have a multigenerational family of nine people living in a four bedroom house, so these are shared expenses and they make the house livable for this many people.
It's easy for me to spend money on educational stuff. We homeschool and we have been really focusing on setting up our learning environment to be what we want it to be. Most of what we buy for the older kids will be usable for the little kids someday, and with six children, what we spend is still far, far, far less than we would spend putting our kids through a private school.
We happily dispatched our second car the moment we could. I was working from home, and now that I work downtown (except today; home with a nasty cold), I take transit. I get a pre-tax transit pass for $90/month, and it is good all the time, on three different kinds of transit in three counties. So much cheaper than a car! And faster. And no parking fees. And someone else does the driving!!
I love all the walking I am doing as a happy side benefit. I'm getting between 6-10,000 steps a day, just doing my regular commute route. I am so much stronger than I was pre-surgery last April. More income, less expense, much better health insurance & with the same provider network I've been with for 20+ years (cancer patients tend to glom onto our good providers and want the reassurance of sticking with them), lots of walking, being downtown which I love, and my job is becoming more fun now that the salary issue has been remedied. I actually am sad to not be there today...
Our biggest debt is my student loans. Since I cannot change the past, we'll whittle away at them over time. I am happy to have an affordable for Seattle mortgage ($2,000/mo) at a phenomenal interest rate, as we re-fi'ed at a perfect time. Our house is lovely, insulated, and comfy. We're committed to being here for many more years. My medical debt also is what it is, and is on a no interest payment plan. Our CC debt is quite low, and will be gone by years end. :)
Now, the other big gap is no retirement fund, as I had to use that to pay for a portion of my treatment. So, save for retirement is our big savings goal. Like the debt, it is what it is. It bums me out occasionally, but truthfully, after cancer treatment, I am a whole lot calmer about life. We'll make it work; we always do.
ApatheticNoMore
1-27-14, 3:45pm
So much cheaper than a car! And faster. And no parking fees. And someone else does the driving!!
driving takes me an hour commuting each way (yes I spend nearly 2 hours a day commuting), whereas transit was taking an hour and a half each way. I feel guilty about it sure and periodically vow I will do more public transit out of great guilt, but 3 hours a day commuting ..... it's not all fun and relaxing commuting of course, it's often crowded like sardines, there are shady characters, etc.. - but the MAIN thing really is the time commitment, I could put up with the shady and being a sardine if it wasn't eating up all my free time.
I spend money on food truthfully, but I love food :)
Gardenarian
1-27-14, 5:14pm
I think food is the area where I am most inconsistent. I have an inner battle between buying the cheapest (dried beans at the Mexican market) and buying the best (organic from the health food store.)
I am also a sucker for when dd says "she's starving!" and we're out. I try to always carry snacks with us, but she has a way of talking me into getting a burrito...I really dislike restaurants myself, so have never had a problem with that, but dd loves eating out.
We happily dispatched our second car the moment we could. I was working from home, and now that I work downtown (except today; home with a nasty cold), I take transit. I get a pre-tax transit pass for $90/month, and it is good all the time, on three different kinds of transit in three counties. So much cheaper than a car! And faster. And no parking fees. And someone else does the driving!!
I love all the walking I am doing as a happy side benefit. I'm getting between 6-10,000 steps a day, just doing my regular commute route. I am so much stronger than I was pre-surgery last April. More income, less expense, much better health insurance & with the same provider network I've been with for 20+ years (cancer patients tend to glom onto our good providers and want the reassurance of sticking with them), lots of walking, being downtown which I love, and my job is becoming more fun now that the salary issue has been remedied. I actually am sad to not be there today...
Our biggest debt is my student loans. Since I cannot change the past, we'll whittle away at them over time. I am happy to have an affordable for Seattle mortgage ($2,000/mo) at a phenomenal interest rate, as we re-fi'ed at a perfect time. Our house is lovely, insulated, and comfy. We're committed to being here for many more years. My medical debt also is what it is, and is on a no interest payment plan. Our CC debt is quite low, and will be gone by years end. :)
Now, the other big gap is no retirement fund, as I had to use that to pay for a portion of my treatment. So, save for retirement is our big savings goal. Like the debt, it is what it is. It bums me out occasionally, but truthfully, after cancer treatment, I am a whole lot calmer about life. We'll make it work; we always do.
I was going to pull quotes to respond to with a "Yay!" but I think the whole post is a "yay!"
So, Yay, redfox!
I love eating at good restaurants, which do not need to be expensive, just high quality. DH & I prioritize really good, organic, local food; it's a major part of our budget, and we cook at home daily. We get prescription food for the cats, which has prevented expensive UTI's & hospitalizations, after we went through three of them at $600 apiece. Ouch! We also just spent quite a bit on our new W/D, but I got a hot deal -- Best Buy was advertising what we wanted at $200 less per machine than the lowest local price at Home Depot, so I just showed them the ad & they met the price! $1400 total. It better last... we got the LG basic model, largest size. Pretty cool machines.
We don't spend on fancy clothes & jewelry (Goodwill for everything except shoes, sox & unders), hair salons, travel, (we go local & uber cheap), expensive cars (basic Toyota Yaris, manual everything), e-toys like TV's, etc. (we have one TV bought from a friend; super low cost). He also prioritizes camera gear for his nascent business, and I did spend some coin on a rug loom -- but sold my smaller floor loom for more that I spent, so that was a plus. I get most of my yarn & weaving materials from the GW too.
We do all our home repair and remodel, as DH is a builder, and has both the tools & skills. We've made significant upgrades to both inside & outside, for our own joy & lifestyle, and for eventual sale, if we go that way. He's built a 5 sided, insulated cedar garden house (with a vintage copper chandelier we found for a song), beautiful curvilinear garden walls within which we've landscaped edible and ornamental gardens, finished off the garage as an art studio, installed a woodstove, and is about to build a custom, classic craftsman staircase out of CG fir & cherry. It's so gratifying removing the contractor grade finishes & replacing them with beautiful materials. We've replaced almost all the light fixtures with cool ones from GW or Second Use (www.seconduse.org). And we paint all the time! I just painted the laundry room with paint we already had, and installed super efficient shelving. It's finally organized. We prioritize beauty & comfort, as long as it's DIY and affordable!
We do all our home repair and remodel, as DH is a builder, and has both the tools & skills. We've made significant upgrades to both inside & outside, for our own joy & lifestyle, and for eventual sale, if we go that way. He's built a 5 sided, insulated cedar garden house (with a vintage copper chandelier we found for a song), beautiful curvilinear garden walls within which we've landscaped edible and ornamental gardens, finished off the garage as an art studio, installed a woodstove, and is about to build a custom, classic craftsman staircase out of CG fir & cherry. It's so gratifying removing the contractor grade finishes & replacing them with beautiful materials. We've replaced almost all the light fixtures with cool ones from GW or Second Use (www.seconduse.org). And we paint all the time! I just painted the laundry room with paint we already had, and installed super efficient shelving. It's finally organized. We prioritize beauty & comfort, as long as it's DIY and affordable!
Forget yay. OMG.. that sounds so awesome. I may offer you rent for the cedar garden house...
Regarding finally being organized. I've been on a decluttering mission for practical reasons (DS moved back in with DDIL and soon-to-be DGS). I was going through a bunch of clippings I've had for 30 years!! Clippings I've saved over the years that represented my vision of my home once I got around to redoing it.
Well, I felt comfortable throwing out all those clippings, because with our last improvements on the flooring and in the kitchen and powder room, we've gone through the whole house and we are happy with it.
I did keep the garden clippings, because now my mission is to "permaculture-ize" my yard. First up: A new raised bed, two rain barrels, a rain garden which includes a japanese deer chaser I bought last year.
Back atcha! Permaculturing is awesome! Please keep us up on your progress. And, the GH is only 64 sf... but does serve as guest space, with a folding double futon in it (which pretty much takes up 80% of the floor space when opened). It's the changing room for the hot tub, and my meditation space. We also have housed two different friends during their separation & divorce proceedings. It was their safe space to get away from a difficult time... one lived there for four months, and shared our kitchen & guest bathroom. It was so fun to have him here, and he even brought his little people over. They LOVED the GH. It's very Hobbit like.
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